Any advice for a psycho ex?

Question

I broke up w/ my ex -girlfriend 3 months ago and she won't stop stalking me. I thought I could handle the issue myself, but found that I can't. I would classify her as obsessive/compulsive. depressed, and bi-polar. She doesn't take medication, but self-medicates with alcohol and cocaine. Recently, she has keyed my car twice ($4k in damages), broken my apartment windows, threated me at work, and much more. I filed a restraining order and was awarded restraint for 1 year from the courts, but I can't get her to leave me alone. She has been arrested twice on felony stalking charges, but she still wont quit. She is just getting better at dodging the police (ie. calling me with a private #). She comes from a well educated and affluent family who don't want to believe the truth..I know this because I have tried to ask for their help in the matter. Anyone have any advice or serious revenge tips?

I want to THANK everyone who has written me in regards to my situation. I was a bit surprised to see so many of you with similar situations, but with great advice. Thanks again!!

Answer 1

I had an x like that. He burnt my house down because I wouldn't come home after he hit me. He told me he was going to do it if I didn't come home and I thought yeah, right. BELIEVE ME, psycho people do not have rational thoughts. They some times follow through on a thought without realizing how crazy the thought is.You can't talk to them to make them understand reasoning because they lack normal understanding. Their hurt becomes anger and they just want to get back at the person that hurt them, in this case you. Beware of this person. Hide your car, have a friend w/you as much as possible. Change your phone number, hell move if it's possible. Just avoid this person at all cost. Psycho people lack patience and eventually when they see they can't upset you they get bored and move on to their next victim.

Answer 2

I had a similar problem with my ex. But my restraining order worked (kind of). I would change my number first, unlisted and don't give it to anyone that still runs with her. Second get proof of what she is doing, catch her in the act. Running helps but isn't always the answer. Get an alarm on the car. If you own your own home then try video cameras to surveillance the outside and the car, if you don't own your home then talk to your landlord and explain to him what is going on, most likely he will allow the cameras. And at work if she calls have a co-worker listen on another line so he can back up your story to the police it also helps the D.A.s case on the felony charges. If you are worried about yourself the get mace to have with you or from the sounds of it a teaser gun might be more effective. Good Luck!!!

Answer 3

When I was 18 I had a stalker ex-boyfriend. It was not fun. I can't say it got as ugly as yours has, but I know how violated and upset you must feel. It stayed with me for quite a while as I couldn't trust other men for a long time. What worked for me as I just so happened to be moving away (which was on my 19th birthday, 8 months after dumping him) that day flowers were delivered by him...ugh I get the heebeejeebies thinking about it today and this is like 15yrs. later. Anyway, I moved away and did nto have a phone number in my name for a few years and I never heard from him again. Change your email address too. Make sure no one you both know together has the new info. I'm sorry but as long as you stay in the same area - it won't get better. I know its not fair either, but she may do something worse to you yet if she has no respect for the law either. Be safe, and protect yourself.

Answer 4

keep calling the police on her and move if you have too. change that phone number. that is what most of women have to do that are in your shoes. this wont always fix the problem but it helps put some space between the problem and sometimes it sends a better message to such people with such problems that it is over. good luck. :)

GO to legal aide and find out what other sources there are to have her in jail for at least 6 months for continuing to break the restraining order. They always can give the best legal advise for free cause that is their job.

Answer 5

My best friends boyfriend actually threatened my friend that he would commit suicide if she didnt go back out with her. But this seems different.. well i think you should get as much help from the police if you can. Its sad how her family doesnt believe the truth because my best friends boyfriends mother also denies that he has a problem. I dont think you should revenge on her because it could make things worse. You should get professional help if she is that crazy. Get a lawyer or something and talk to your parents and keep talking to her parents and her friends

Answer 6

The police need to get more serious out this. I would go file complaint after complaint. Tape her phone calls, get pictures of her or video of her violating the order. Talk to a lawyer and find out your rights.

Here is a website of stalking laws by state, it may be of some help http://crime.about.com/od/women/a/stalking_laws.htm

Answer 7

revenge would not be a good idea but i would make sure that the police are fully informed of the whole situation. also, you could sure her for damages on your car, apartment, and for harrasment. u would have a good case for it 2 because of her arrests. from there, you could get another restraining order if necesary and finally, she could go to jail for breaking those laws. keep ur chin up. i had a psyco ex bf before. i understand where u r coming from. good luck.

Answer 8

Don't try to get revenge. Keep calling the police even if it is 100 times. She is dangerous. Keep yourself safe.

Answer 9

Well, I would certainly not even think of revenge with a sick person. Maybe you will have to move and find a new job......or hang in and she will eventually screw up and get thrown in jail.

Answer 10

Revenge certainly isn't the answer. What about changing your phone number?