My parents believe this and i don't. They seem to think that i'm suposed to be a mirror image of them and i don't agree with that. They've raised me well and i'm thankful to them for that, but I don't think i'm suposed to share all of the same beliefs and convictions and standards with them. They do tend to have very extreme beliefs that i could never agree with because it's so unbalanced!
2006-09-18 09:46:12 · 27 answers · asked by mountaingirl88 3 in Society & Culture ➔ Religion & Spirituality
No, I don't believe you have to have the same beliefs and convictions as your parents. You are your own person, you have your own ideas, thoughts and beliefs. They should respect that. You should have different beliefs than your parents, it shows that you can think for youself. You took what they taught you and what they believe and you turned into your own beliefs.
2006-09-18 09:51:07 · answer #1 · answered by Jessica 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
No your not. But it depends on the cultural context of your heritage as to what your parents think you should be doing. I have seen in many Asian cultures that if they don't do just what their parents think they should, there is a shame factor there. But doing what your parents want you to do,,... and them wanting you to do EXACTLY WHAT THEY DID, are different things.
Being and American of English decent I think that part of the reason parents send their children to school is to learn to think for themselves. This doesn't just include doing things that might be undesirable to your parents. You also have to remember things like creativity in solving problems and developing your own life that makes you happy.
Also your parents were raised in a different time frame than you. Unless everyone is raised in some kind of parallel universe where all standards and situations are identical... how can they expect you to think the same way that they do?
What I would tell your parents is that you are a gift to them, in the same way a good friend is a gift. You are their kin, but they don't own you. They should cherish the diversities you bring to the table. They should treat your points of view as a fresh perspective for themselves. People are constantly changing and adapting. How can your parents expect you to be just like them, when 10 years ago... they weren't the same people that they are now.
2006-09-18 09:57:29 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
You just need to believe "The Truth". I found that my parents believed a few different things than I do once I was an adult. Instead of forcing my beliefs on them - I just made sure I could back up what I believed with facts and truths from the Bible when conflicts in our beliefs arose.
Now as a mother - it isn't easy watching my children make choices I know aren't "right" for them - but I have to trust that I have shown them "The Truth" and they will be strong in that!
2006-09-18 09:52:09 · answer #3 · answered by nattie_mae 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Do they share the same convictions and standards as their parents? If not, they're being a bit hypocritical.
Of course parents want to teach their values, and if you live under their roof you have to respect those values, but eventually, you get to make your own choices. I'm sure some things they gave you will stick with you, and you can let them know about the stuff that did stick.
2006-09-18 09:48:23 · answer #4 · answered by GreenEyedLilo 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Some parents are over-caring & over-protective . They want their children to learn from them rather than doing it themselves & going thru the not always a nice way to apprehend things .
We all know its not always practically possible to do so . But what we can try is to look for a mid-way . Even if you do not agree with your parents , don't tell it straight to them . Talk to them & explain them that you as a different person have a different point of view but it doesn't mean that you are against their opinion, neither should they be against yours. Make them understand that you may not be their mirror image but nevertheless you understand their expectations .
Have your points listed, well-time your discussion & try it results in a win-win situation for all .
2006-09-18 20:12:56 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
As a parent, one of the things I most desperately hope for my children is that they are able to work out for themselves what they believe, and how they want to live their lives.
That's not to say I wouldn't be glad if they ended up sharing some of my convictions, but it would be far more rewarding if they did so because they had thought it through and reached the same conclusions as me, rather than because I had insisted they think the same way as me...
2006-09-18 09:51:21 · answer #6 · answered by shiny_monkey_boy 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
a lot of people tend to believe the exact opposite of their parents. The stronger the beliefs, the stronger the rebellion.
2006-09-18 09:48:24 · answer #7 · answered by Kenny ♣ 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Certainly not! I'm glad to hear that you're thinking for yourself. You sound like you're not far from getting out of the house. Congrats on sustaining your own beliefs!
And good luck in future.
2006-09-18 09:51:06 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
"supposed to" is nothing more than the statement of someone's ideal. When your parents tell you you're "supposed to" share their ideals, all that means is they will be dissapointed if you don't.
It's up to you to decide whether your freedom of thought outweighs their expectations of controlling your thoughts. If you suppress yourself, it will torture you every day of your life. If you don't, your parents will have to go through a brief transition period where they have to learn to accept you, and then things will be fine again.
If it were me, I would pick my own freedom.
2006-09-18 09:53:05 · answer #9 · answered by lenny 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No! Each of us is born to the earth plane to learn lessons. The more we learn and open to new ideas, the more we formulate our own convictions.
2006-09-18 09:50:28 · answer #10 · answered by jmmevolve 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋