OK- My best friend lives with her boyfriend, they have been together around 3 years. They are the model couple. I am close with both of them.
Today she went home, and went to go online, and a few of his IM's were left up on the computer. She read them. They were conversations with girls. One of them was extreme flirting and him saying "so do you want me to come over?" As well as other light "sex talk".Apparently, it sounded like a serious conversation, from what she read.
She confronted him about them, and he swears that he was just joking around with some old friends he hasn't talked to in a while. He does have a lot of girl FRIENDS that he is flirtatious with, but he does NOT seem the type to cheat. I know him really well.
He called me and is really upset. I think he shouldn't have been talking like that to other girls, but I don't think he is cheating, do you?
2006-09-18 09:36:38 · 16 answers · asked by misscongeniality711 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
I dont know if he's cheating but isn't sexual talk with other girls just as bad ? Isn't needing to have all these other girls around just as bad ? Does your friend want to settle for a guy who flirts and chats with other girls ? And let me tell you something, you say he doesn't seem to be the type to cheat. Did he seem the type to have sexual conversations with other girls ?
2006-09-18 09:41:06 · answer #1 · answered by JustMe 6 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Your crazy if you believe this crap. It doesn't matter how long and well you know someone. A person will cheat no matter how good of a person they treat and act towards you. Just because "You" don't think he would cheat does not make it void. This guy clearly is doing things he has no business doing. If he's so innocent why would he put up something saying that he wants another woman to come over. Do you really think that's just joking around? If you do then something is wrong with you. He got caught and he's trying to run this sad game. If he has a girlfriend he has no business whatsoever talking with other girls this way. Your friend deserves respect and I hope she finds it elsewhere. I hope your friend has more sense then you where this is concerned because if she's taking your advice by some chance then she's defintely going to find herself hurt down the road if he doesn't stop this.
2006-09-18 16:50:52 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
In this situation it really depends on the guy, both of you should know what kind of person he is. I can be completely innocent.
Although he wasn't cheating I think what he was doing was wrong and it is very disrespectful to his gf. Plus now she must be upset and uncomfortable and he caused that!So as a friend you should tell him what he did was wrong even if he didn't cheat (and don't intend to)and he should stop.
As far as his gf, she shouldn't deal with it if its bothering her and if he loves her he will stop and do it at least out of respect for her.
2006-09-18 16:45:59 · answer #3 · answered by Pudge_Monsta 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I agree I dont' think he cheating either. They've been together for so long. It's different chatting online then it is that and hook'en up with someone. BUT he should stop doing what he's doing cause he's not respecting her either. Too much talking online with other girls can lead him want to try something else and curious. So talk to him and tell him that that's not cool and he needs to kick back
2006-09-18 16:49:44 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
I think younger men - "boys" go through a period where they really think that you have to get physical in order for it to be "cheating."
Not so.
In a mature loving relationship, you are best friends with your lover. You also express yourself sexually with her exclusively. Having "light sex" talk with someone else violates that exclusivity.
It's also not nice to let down your best friend that way.
Also, consider this. Just as abusive language left unchecked ALWAYS eventually becomes physical abuse, cheating language will do the same.
So I think this "Boy" needs to reconsider the nature of his commitment to his best friend/mate, and embrace his manhood with more maturity.
When asked what was the secret to being the most publicly acclaimed romantic lover of women [on the silent movie screen,] Rudolph Valentino replied "Simple. To be an amazing lover of women you must love one woman completely."
2006-09-18 16:51:17 · answer #5 · answered by Jerry 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Not really sure because you have to think about it, people be on IM all the time, and 9 times out of 10 its nothing but flirting, cpu sex, and etc. But its harmless unless one comes in contact with the other. And also how serious the conversations are. Really I don't think he's cheating I think its harmless....
2006-09-18 16:45:53 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 2⤋
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yes it sounds to me as if he is up to no good.....old friends Pleeze. He called you, all upset, knowing you would tell your friend how upset he sounded. Its just a scam to hopefully cover his butt...he's hoping to get you on his side. I would not trust what he is saying.
2006-09-18 16:51:25 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
Fantasizing about other women is NORMAL.
Taking action is... well, that's normal too, but just not right.
A little flirting is just him satisfying his ego that he can have fun with these things. Think of it as just practicing so that he can flirt better with your best friend.
give him a break. he probably looks at pictures of other girls when he masterbates as well- doesn't mean he's cheating.
2006-09-18 16:43:34 · answer #8 · answered by Morey000 7 · 0⤊ 2⤋
He is cheating emotionally, which can be worse than actually going out with someone else.
2006-09-19 08:10:28 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I didn’t even bother reading a word of your post. All I need to know is that he’s a guy….so the answer is YES, HE IS CHEATING. All guys do honey
2006-09-18 16:55:58 · answer #10 · answered by hailyankees 2 · 1⤊ 2⤋