i am dating a really great guy. we started dating and from the beginning he let me know he wanted me. he made it clear that he liked to stay with me at night and just cuddle even if we did not have sex. now he only seems to get together with me if it is clear to me that he wants to make love. i can clearly see the change in him. he will make excuses to go home, such as i have not had a shower yet after work,ect. my feelings are hurt, but i do not want to admit it. should i come clean and have a talk with him? it is embarrassing for me. maybe i shoudl tell him to hit the road? what would you do? i need advice on how to handle this.
2006-09-18 07:05:00 · 17 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
The best advise is for you to give him a chance before telling him to hit the road. If you love him then you need to get up the courage and talk to him about your feelings. If you don't have good communications skills then surely your relationships will never work. Just talk to him and come back and re-ask your question once you have talked to him if you still have any questions on how to deal with the matter.
2006-09-18 07:19:32 · answer #1 · answered by Novotny 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Are you ready to have sex? You need to talk to him about it. Tell him that you miss cuddling and you want this relationship to continue to grow. Then you need to explain what you are willing to do sexually (if anything). See what he has to say. It may be something like he respects your values so much that he doesn't want to push you into something you aren't ready to do and he feels tempted to pressure you. He also might not be that interested in you anymore or might be under a lot of stress. Talking is the only way to find out.
My bf and I went through something similar. The reason why he didn't want to stay with me was because he was tempted to do something that he might regret. Once we talked it out, things were fine, and we are going stronger than ever.
2006-09-18 14:07:45 · answer #2 · answered by emp04 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
The best thing to do in a relationship is to be open and honest with eachother. You should definately talk to him about this and let him know that it's something that has been bothering you and you needed to talk with him about it. Sometimes, it can be hard to make the first move and talk with your significant other about certain issues, but once you talk to him about it, you will feel so much better! Talking and working things out always solves the problem. Hope this helps!
2006-09-18 14:11:01 · answer #3 · answered by kristy 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
wow you have to be really careful with guys and sex. if you feel used you most likely are being used and it seems really hard to talk about these issues but if he is a good guy and he cares about you he wont get mad but if he does get mad or upset becuase you talking about how you feel then he does need to hit the road but at least give him a chance he might not even relize what he is doing make it fare to both of you and talk to him
2006-09-18 14:17:33 · answer #4 · answered by carmelfude2003 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yeah, that's right, keep on going along in order not to be along. You're half the partnership in this relationship and should have half the say as to what affects both of you. If you can't open up and speak what's on your mind, you are in for a huge surprise, when one day he leaves you. Everyone wants a challenge in their relationship (just don't take to the extreme). While you are at it, speak up for yourself; and get what you want. Remember the old cliche: "Closed mouth doesn't get feed"?
2006-09-18 14:14:51 · answer #5 · answered by Swordfish 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
YES, talk to him and in the meantime do not give him any loving.There is nothing embarassing, you did nothing wrong, he is bring a jerk.There is something up or he is just tired.Talk to him go with what your brain and intuition says. I would stop the nooky let him know that I am not his bed buddy and find out what is going on.If he gives me an answer that is balony or continues to act like that then he is not worth my time or my lovin.
2006-09-18 14:09:08 · answer #6 · answered by Amry 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to find out what he thinks about your relationship. You both need to sit down and have a nice long chat about where you think the relationship is going and how far you want to enter into it. Does he take it as seriously as you. Does he understand your feelings. All these things are need to know things if you want the relationship to work.
2006-09-18 14:14:04 · answer #7 · answered by cheery 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you feel he's using you then whats the point in talking to him ? If he doesn't seem to want to spend time with you unless your going to have sex then why even be with him ? If that's how he feels talking to him will not change that. He told you what he told you in the beginning probably to get sex.
2006-09-18 14:10:19 · answer #8 · answered by JustMe 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
its easy to stay the night without getting laid in the beginning, but after a while when you are no longer "Ms. new booty" then men need a bit more motivation to stay. he' just not that into you. sorry but its true. the times where i was really into a chick, i stayed. when i wasnt into her..i left. especially if i knew i wasnt getting any. my advice to you is if you want him to stay the night, you gotta sleep with him. is that asking too much? i think not.
2006-09-18 14:11:25 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would kick him in the balls first. I know it sounds a little violent, and overdramatic, but it gets the point across. Why tell him how hurt you feel, if guys don't normally care. Instead...let him know what it's like. kick him and say "see that's how I feel, but on the inside"
2006-09-18 14:20:49 · answer #10 · answered by JESSICA A 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋