Do I give the gift to the bride and groom at the reception, or do I ship/mail it?

Question

I was asked a question the other day about my best friend's wedding registry and how expensive the stuff listed on it is, anyways some person gave me some ideas about affordable gifts, and blah blah blah, but then they said I should never give the gift to the Bridge or Groom at the wedding or reception. Apprantly it's a big no no, and I must mail it. Is this true?

Answer 1

Every wedding reception I have been at, even mine, had a gift table.

You don't hand the present to the bride or groom (that might be awkward or a no-no), you simply place it on the table, appropriately tagged, when you get to the reception.

And the table is at the reception location, and not at the wedding -that, again, might be a no-no or at least awkward unless the two are combined for some reason.

Have fun.

Answer 2

I believe you may have been confused about which gift to send and which gift to bring. You are the best friend and as such a special gift is to be given prior to the wedding itself. But this is something done in the past and has very little baring on weddings of today. You can take a mutual gift for both bride and groom to the reception. Now if you are not attending the wedding of course you will mail the item. However if you are attending and are part of the wedding the priority gift is given to the bride before the wedding and, as I said, a mutual gift is laid on the community table of gifts. However, there are so many traditions passed down from family members to family members. Should you need more examples of bridal edict call a local wedding planner. They can help!

Answer 3

Well, I wouldn't just walk up to them and hand them a gift in the middle of the reception. That's kinda tacky.

What I would do, is once you get to the reception area, look for a gift table. Most couples will have one set up in case there were folks who couldn't attend the bridal shower, or couldn't get a gift in time for the bridal shower. If they have one, just run out to the car to get your gift. Often, the bride and groom are a little late to the reception because pictures being taken. So that would be the most oppotune time for you to place the gift at the gift table.

If they don't have a gift table, and you missed the bridal shower, then perhaps asking either the maid of honor, best man, or the parents of either bride or groom what would be most convenient.

Good Luck!

Answer 4

You can always ask the bride or groom if you're not sure. Customs are different in different areas, but most weddings I have been to had a gift table. The main time taking a gift to the reception isn't a good idea is if the bride and groom live out of town, or are moving shortly. (I went to one where they were moving to another city right after the wedding, and had asked that gifts be sent to them there.)

And hey, if you're still not sure and you're driving yourself to the wedding/reception, take the gift and leave it in the car. Then you can go in, check it out and see if anyone else is leaving gifts. If they are, just go, "Whoops, forgot the goft in the car..." and go back and get it!

Answer 5

According to any etiquette experts you will find, they ALL say it's bad manners to take the gift to the wedding (or reception). Of course there will be a table - because some people will bring their gifts anyway. The "proper" thing to do is have it shipped. ...and here's the MAIN reason - the couple will have enough to do without stopping everything to take the gift and worrying about what to do with the gifts and who is going to make sure nothing gets stolen and who will be in charge of making sure they get picked up and taken home and where they will be and how they will get them later so they can open them. The "to do" list is already long enough!

I can say that I was very grateful for the people who sent their gifts instead of bringing them. Of course, it was sweet of them to give gifts and they all got wonderful thank-you notes either way, but I really appreciated the ones that I knew I didn't have to worry about. It was one thing off my mind on a day that was VERY busy!

Answer 6

Preferably, send the gift to the bride before the wedding or to the couple soon thereafter. In some regions gifts are brought to the reception and placed on a special table. Contrary to a current rumor that you have a year to send a gift, it really should be sent right away or within three months of the wedding.

Answer 7

Usually you would bring a gift from the registry to a bridal shower. If you do not go to the shower then yes you can bring it to the wedding. In most cases the wedding gift is monetary though. I don't know if you meant a gift for their wedding alone or in addition to the $$ you will give them on the wedding day.

If you are deciding between the two I would just give money and either way it is fine to bring it to the wedding. You would probably only send it if you were not attending the wedding and/or shower.

Answer 8

Unless people from out of town were shipping us a gift, all of our guests brought the gift to the reception & put it on a table set aside for gifts. Every wedding I've ever been to has had a gift table. I've never shipped the gift unless it was to someone getting married out of town and I was not able to attend.

Answer 9

Either is acceptable nowadays, but if you know the bride and/or groom well enuf, just ask them if they have a preference.

Mailing it would be less expensive for you, and brides & grooms love to see their gift table filled up the reception (the ones I've seen anyway).

The best way to get an important question answered is to go to the source. And, if they're good people, they'll appreciate the thoughtfullness of asking on your part.

Hope this helps. Congrats & Good Luck!

Answer 10

If the gift is small, then I would say take it to the reception. If the gift is large or heavy, I would have it sent directly to the bride and groom's home just prior to the wedding.