I noticed that my g/f has been getting text messages from her ex and the other night he im'd her and she closed the im out. She said that they are just friends and enjoys hanging out with his friends... I got pissed and didn't undersand, becasue all she use to talk about was how much of an *** he was... i don't get it. The other day i just couldn't take it anymore and read a couple messages that she had with him, and she i'md him both times, one talking about how she hates fighiting with me and that i ask her to many questions, which might be true, but i think i have the right too when i see these type of things going on. the next one was a very flirty one ending in "hey i'll be at school (college) all day give me a call, talk to you later.. i need some direction about this...
2006-09-18 04:42:19 · 42 answers · asked by Moto 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
If she wants to be friends with her ex, I say why not. However, you are her current and she should respect your feelings. She shouldn't be sneaking around behind your back. She should disclose the conversations with you. Think about this: How long have you been together? How long were they together? How long ago did they break up? Did their relationship end in a friendly manner? Do you think they are working on getting back together? Ask yourself these questions and then do the math. If two and two are not four, then hit the road and don't look back. If you really care about her and her feelings for you are mutual, then sit down and have a really nice chat. If she gets snippy, then that is not a good sign. Tell her that you need her patience and you just want to know that she is with you and not him. If she talks to him because she needs a friend to talk to, tell her that is what siblings and female friends are for, not ex-boyfriends. Especially if she is talking about you. It almost seems like she is comparing the two of you and that is not fair to you.
2006-09-18 04:52:16 · answer #1 · answered by cbencal 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't think that her contact with her ex is appropriate when she has a relationship with you now. If she keeps on talking to this guy, it will only cause more stress in your relationship soooooooo tell her to end the contact with the ex or you will break up with her. You obviously will not be happy with her talking to her ex....there will always be doubt in your mind. And, there should be! If she refuses, break it off with her. You will be saving yourself a big headache! If she can't be happy not talking to the ex, then it would never work out in the long run between you anyway. Good luck!
2006-09-18 04:49:08 · answer #2 · answered by Wendy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do not get mad, it's a lot better that you know about it, because it could happen the same, and you without knowing it.
You should be more self-confident.
Tip: The less you LOOK worried, the better, if you can control, and show her that you "don't care", even though it's not true, she will be more open to the issue, and you will realize that is not that important, neither for her, nor for you.
Later on, you sill laugh at this situation, it's all in your head.
2006-09-18 04:47:46 · answer #3 · answered by Classy 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That's a tough one. It could be innocent. I still talk to my ex's, they're my hubby's friends...but then I was never intimate with these guys. If she is the type that would go estray then I would be pissed. But really you shouldn't show jealousy to her. It is a good way to break you two up or even push her back with him. If he has a girlfriend on the other hand. I'd think it'd be okay. It's hard to say...I don't know you or her.
2006-09-18 04:45:49 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't know normally I would say let her have her friends especially if there is trust and confidence in the realtionship. Now the things she writes are as if she wants something to do with this guy again and so she makes you to be the heavy in the picture. I would question her about it and if things don't seem right, that should be it between you'll, you have nothing when you don't have trust!!!
2006-09-18 04:45:21 · answer #5 · answered by lasugarfree 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yeah, I had the same thing - a year later after we broke up after 4 years I find out she was humping him the entire time - awesome.
So no, it's not OK, believe me - I'm sure he just wants to talk?? yeah right, he's picturing in his head the stuff he used to do to her!
Break up with her, but whatever you do, don't act jealous, that just makes her want him more and she'll run back to him the first chance she gets.
Good luck brother, it's a lose lose situation.
2006-09-18 04:44:30 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Shes going to suck the sausage soon! She wants her EX back, here man, tell her this, Look Bytch! You either, stop talking to the EX or I leave your as$... Or maybe her EX is just an EX- and thats all... I mean you do have some choices, but then again she might be in for the loving, WHO KNOWS?! Is she one that can be trusted? I mean come on fruitcake, let her do her thing! If she cheats and gets back with the EX it just means that it wasn't meant to be; its not fair for you to tell her whom she can and cannot talk with. You know what I mean? Leave her the fack alone with her EX! If she wants him back, then its her choice not your;s! Good Luck.
2006-09-18 04:46:39 · answer #7 · answered by brazoian 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's OK for her to do whatever she wants! You are going to ruin it for yourself!! Get over it and get on with it!! You can't make her not talk to him! You can't control her! You can only be the best you can be and hope she like you better than others. Showing your butt like you are will not improve your situation! Jealousy is not a good thing! You have to trust her. You already have some info. that she does not like fighting with you and all the questions. Lighten up and have fun or you won't be with her at all!!
2006-09-18 04:49:40 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I do have to agree with *mostly* everyone else in saying she's definitely interested in him still. And unfortunately, some of us girls' like to put ourselves through the hellish torture of liking a guy that's a total ***-hole. Unless you guys have been dating for a few months, I'd call it quits now and find yourself a girl that'll be devoted to you and that you know you can trust. Good luck! Sorry for the bad news! Good luck!
2006-09-18 04:52:24 · answer #9 · answered by superrix83 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think that you should talk wit hyour girl about how it ticks you off when she talks to her ex and flirts with him without talking to you about the problems that she is having with you. I know from experience that the only time that a girl hangs on to their ex is when there are still feelings there for or from him. Either way I think that it is bad for a relationship for either party to be involved with an ex.
2006-09-18 04:46:40 · answer #10 · answered by twopastmidnight 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋