at the moment i just recently met this guy and i dont have strong feelings towards him and he has deep feeling towards me. He constantly keeps ringing me and telling me how he wants to spend the rest of his life with me,wants to have kids and this is really starting to scare me. What shall i do?
2006-09-18 04:05:23 · 36 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Find a different guy. Obsessive guys can't be fixed they just need to be avoided altogether.
2006-09-18 04:06:38 · answer #1 · answered by live2ride 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Hi
I will admit, I used ot have this problem and it scared me a lot, so I know what you're going through. I'd suggest blocking his phone number for a start, changing your email address is another option and also confide in friends. If your friends can see what he's been sending you (Text messages, email etc) and you tell them what has been going on, they'll be there to help you and back you up no matter what you do.
I wouldn't suggest aproaching the guy about it because it will make him come on all the more to you.
If it starts to annoy you any more, then the final step is a re-straining order, but lets hope that it doesn't come down to that ;)!
Good luck!
Luv
Metia
XO
2006-09-18 04:09:21 · answer #2 · answered by metiae65 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You could marry him!!! After all what are you looking for in a guy. If he isnt what you are looking for, why are you with him. Are you just using him for sex. We are not just pieces of meat. typical double standards. Hehe ( he says with a smile ).
In all seriousness if he didnt tell you these things and almost ignored you, you would probably be more interested. There is nothing wrong in being head over heels in love with someone.
however there is also the problem if he becomes a sort of stalker type ( bunny boiler ) But ideally we al want someone that does love us, may you just arent at that stage of your life yet!!
At the end of the day it is down to you. to decide is he harmless or harmful.
2006-09-18 04:47:58 · answer #3 · answered by Fox Hunter 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell him to back off, or flat out tell him you are not interested. If you hate the phone calls, tell him to stop calling. If he continues to call, contact your phone company and tell them the situation. They will start keeping a log (paper trail) of your calls. Many phone companies also offer call block which enables you to block certain numbers, but also contact the phone company, and have them start to make a log. If worse comes to worse, go down to your local court house and file restraining order papers. Under the restraining order, also falls stalking, harassment and other various charges. If he is scaring you, start collecting a paper trail, start writing down things as they happen and don't be afraid to call the police and make police reports. If you do end up in the court of law, every piece of evidence will be needed. Good luck.... been there, done that!
2006-09-18 04:13:00 · answer #4 · answered by mixemup 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to be honest and truthful with him; it sounds like he's been telling you a lot on how HE feels, but you haven't been telling him how YOU feel.
To turn him down politely, try to tell him that YOU are not ready to move forward with a commitment like that. Make it sound like its not a problem with his obessiveness; but that you don't have the time to put forth the energy he does.
If the guy really does "love you", then he might understand where you are coming from and will back off a little bit.
2006-09-18 04:09:25 · answer #5 · answered by flyboop_2000 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Get rid. If he's this obsessive so early on it'll just get worse cos usually obsessive people at least try to attempt to hide it in the beginning. This would imply that he's a serious weirdo. If you dont even like him that much its best to get out before you fall too deep.
2006-09-18 04:08:07 · answer #6 · answered by Ella G 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Run. Same thing happened to me last year. When I told him I thought we were moving at different paces, he said he'd wait for me to catch up. But he asked if I was "there yet" on every date. We only saw each other for one month but he called me and left a crazed message on my machine when I ended it. Obsession like this can be the first sign of a real nutter.
2006-09-18 04:09:13 · answer #7 · answered by Iknowsomestuff 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
don't let it get out of control. it freaks me out when people get real deep to soon. if it's like this now you'llnot have a life later on. he may be a little insecure and needs your reassurance. talk to him and tell him you want to take things slow. if he can't handle that call it a day. i feel he may come possessive more than he is already.
but hey, it's your life, your call. hope all ends well lol
2006-09-18 04:13:26 · answer #8 · answered by SIMON T 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Break up now and if he does anything weird of dangerous, the number for the police is 9-1-1. Be safe.
2006-09-18 04:07:05 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just tell him hes a great guy but that you are focused on a million different things right now and not ready for a soulmate
2006-09-18 04:12:08 · answer #10 · answered by Nimbus 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋