Im 34 year old have 36 year old girlfrend. who has 2 kids a boy aged 12 and girl of 10. We love each other. but wen i proposed her for marriage she hasitate and not able to make decision. i convinced her that i'll love and look after kids if i marry and assured her that i'll never treat them as stepchildren, hown can i convince her for marriage?
2006-09-18 03:17:36 · 12 answers · asked by Egor B 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
She is right to be wary. Even a saint's patience is tried by children and when they aren't your own..... They are approaching the teen years where the stress could take a toll on your relationship. My advice to you would be to come to a solid agreement on who will carry out the discipline and how the children will be disciplined. It's best for the biological parent to do the disciplining but you have to feel as though you have some role in the decisions.
2006-09-18 03:24:45 · answer #1 · answered by porkchop 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do the kids like u, do they want u as part of their family? She may be scared for her children or maybe she fears that u dont really love her and that it wont work out. Talk to the kids and convince them to help u convince her to marry u. Or maybe she just needs some more time. But dont worry its a big step 4 her, and if she's been hurt b/4 she might be afraid that it can happen again. Just be patient and make her feel really secure.
2006-09-18 10:28:24 · answer #2 · answered by chinaz777 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Since I am a women myself, this is how I see it. I think that she is using the fact that she has 2 kids to her advantage. Many people use there kids as a scapegoat to avoid other issues they may be concerned with. For example, was she married before? Maybe she thinks that you will leave her like her ex. Or maybe her kids had a hard time when there dad left, and doesn't want to dissapoint them again. This is just a point of view, I don't know your situation exactly, but I would talk to her and rest any insecurities she has.
2006-09-18 10:26:46 · answer #3 · answered by ce1121 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You said the right things maybe she needs to talk with her children about this bc this is a big change for them too just give her sometime and keep asuring her that you will come through on your word. It is not only a big step for you two but a big one for her children. I am sure she is only hesitant because of her children and she might be scared becasue of her other marriage failing. So just give her sometime and talk with her and find out why.
Well good luck
2006-09-18 10:24:24 · answer #4 · answered by knowssignlanguage 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Talking her into something she's not sure about is not good, especially when it has to do with marriage. This kind of relationship, where kids are involved, takes something extra special from both of you. I think you should give her time to sort this out in her own mind. Such a marriage is not easy, but it can succeed. Mine has.
2006-09-18 10:35:47 · answer #5 · answered by Dr. Dave 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
give her time. she's worried because it probably didn't work out with the father of her children and she's afraid it will go wrong now. talk to her, let her know how much you love her and her children. good luck!
2006-09-18 10:22:40 · answer #6 · answered by sea_star 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
she must have a reason...just try and know why she refused your offer then you take the next line of action. No bullet point advise to your question.
2006-09-18 10:23:51 · answer #7 · answered by zily 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
dude.. you shou,dn't have to convince her. If you need to convince she not ready and it can be a bigger mess soen the road
2006-09-18 10:24:20 · answer #8 · answered by wilfreds805 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Be patient and keep trying.
2006-09-18 10:20:20 · answer #9 · answered by Pitambri 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You want her because she has nice t*ts,don't ya,you ornery devil?
2006-09-18 10:21:19 · answer #10 · answered by Putt 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋