my girfriend told me her ex was a police officer he hancuffed her and had kinky sex whatever that is?they done anal to which i enjoy,she said she wont do it with me because it hurts but she said she enjoyed it with her ex,im confused,is it right she says she loves me,she used to keep set of cuffs by the bed when he come over she met me threw them away, she says she loves me,am i the chump shes settling down with,we are geeting married in 6 mths,help please,yes i have tryed talking,she sulks.
2006-09-17 21:29:45 · 51 answers · asked by jonas 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
may be she had a bad and painful experience
2006-09-17 21:31:43 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 2⤋
My feeling is that a lot of these answers are crap.
She told you about her ex, that's fine, have you told each other about all your relationships? If so, then she should be a little more open to talking about things instead of sulking, just be careful not to whine about it to her.
Really, it's a fine line you walk. People are allowed to want different things, when they're with different people. On the other hand, there seems to be things she enjoyed doing, that she refuses to do with the person she will supposedly spend the rest of her life with, but cannot give good reasons why. I can understand that, really, but if you keep pushing, it'll probably get worse.
The one question that would save a lot of trouble, to which we are not privy to the answer, is:
How good is your communication OUTSIDE the bedroom?
If it's bad there, it won't get any better when you bring up bondage and anal sex.
2006-09-20 16:15:15 · answer #2 · answered by zed 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
The best way to get back your ex is https://tr.im/FT7kf
Here's the hard part: Pretend she never existed, like it was all a dream, don't call her, that will make you the smaller person, be the bigger person since you deserve better, what she did to you on Valentines Day was immature, especially after dating for four years. This person wasted allot of your time and through it out the window. Go out tonight, even it it is only yourself, don't drink and call or feel sorry for yourself, this will only cause you embarrassment! I know your hurting..This will eventually will go away in time. Today is not a good day for you and your emotions are spinning all over the place.
Please, whatever you do, don't answer her calls and don't call her. If she keeps calling, which she pro bally won't, don't return her call for 5 days. Make her sweat and DO Not get back together right away if you discuss this in 5 days. Tell her since she Broke up with you, you have done allot of thinking, and had the taste of "being single again" and you would like more time being "friends" for now, so you are sure you are making the right decision. Remember "She decided she didn't want to be with you" so the door is open for you to get out and see what you have been missing for four years. You honestly need to do this for yourself.
She doesn't know, but what she did was give you the best valentines day present you will ever get! A new start and a new beginning, use it to your advantage. You will look back on this and Thank God this happened now instead of 4 more wasted years of YOUR life. Today does suck, stay Strong and I promise you your life is going to be so much more exciting and you are going to be happy. If you continue to call and call her, she will think of you as needy and won't want you. She is going to rethink what she did to you today and will be hurt, if you act like you could care less. Girls always want the ones they can't have. That is who you are now to her. Let her suffer,realizing what a mistake she made. This will drive her crazy. Right now she is on cloud 9 thinking you will take her back, OH, is she stupid!
Your life isn't ruined, hers is..She lost someone special, and gave you a gift to let to live life and find someone you deserve. You are not getting back at her, your teaching her what an idiot she is and what she lost and what you gained without her. SO when You eventually talk to her, tell her thank you for what she did...
She will be hurt and you will be happy!
2016-07-19 22:36:52 · answer #3 · answered by Jarvis 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
hav u ever thought maybe ur a lil better endowed than her ex. What is comfy with something finger-sized may not necessarily be the same with something banana-sized. Get my drift..? Besides y would that automatically make u a chump? Maybe (n i personally don't blame her) she has made a conscious decision not to do that anymore cuz she never really liked it in the first place! n she wants to spend the rest of her life with u being happy. She may be a lil embarassed to explain in explicit detail why she doesn't like anal n that's y she "sulks". Perhaps if ur insistant on the subject, sulkin may be the only way she knows how to get u to drop the subject. Obviously she wants u NOT her ex, seein as its ur name on the invitations, ha?! Sounds a lil like ur sulking or ur getting cold feet n starting to squirm.....
2006-09-17 21:54:51 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 4⤊ 0⤋
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I think the problem here is just that you are sexy. The only explanation for this kind of phenomenon is extreme sexiness.
Try performing some brain surgery on a cat. Just score the skull with a razor of some sort, and hit it with a tap hammer, it will open right up like a coconut. Remove the brain, and replace with, lets say, a brick of cheese. The cat will then regain consciousness and be an unlimited source of cheese, 100% getting rid of whatever is waking you up.
See, sometimes there are 'beings' present with you. The reason for this is lack of cheese. So sometimes the cat will eat the cheese, but then he'll have to perform his own brain surgery.
Also, this type of thing can happen if you have AIDS. Of course, there is a greater risk for big fat doo doo heads to get AIDS than it is for a normal person. Sir, i do believe you might be a big fat doo doo head. Meaning, you may have AIDS, there is about a 100% chance that you have AIDS. But this shouldnt be anything to worry about. AIDS is curable by eating a cat that has cheese for a brain. Although cheese is toxic to humans and birds, eating it will kill you. So I would give you a word of advice. Eat the cats cheese brain, then call him a big fat doo doo head. You will then die, and be reincarnated into the cats body. Once this happens, perform brain surgery, and put a piece of Corvette in the cats head. Then eat the cheese, and you will die and be healthy in your normal body, the body of a bird, of course.
Now, if you wish to keep AIDS, just go eat a piece of the moon and you should be fine within 1.53-1.54 seconds.
Hope this helped!
2006-09-21 18:27:16 · answer #5 · answered by ADX 1 · 0⤊ 3⤋
Why don't you give her a break, she said it hurts and maybe she felt degraded as that is an unnatural thing to do (it was not meant for that) then maybe she was drugged or they used something to make her feel like she enjoyed it. If she loves you it doesn't mean that she will do or give you everything you want. SHe must have probably been experimenting but left that life with her ex.
2006-09-17 22:06:02 · answer #6 · answered by Ycul72 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
anal sex can be great but it can also be very painful. an obvious thing to consider is r u much bigger than her ex?
she may have done all these things with her ex but she may not have enjoyed them hun. maybe she didn't really like being not in full control. she may feel with u that she enjoys wot u do do together and doesn't want to go back to doing things she knows is not 4 her.
u need to enjoy wot u have together,and never put pressure on her to do things she doesn't want to do. u may find that she will properly relax and be willing to start to extend the range of things u do.
2006-09-17 21:56:24 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
i think you should stop nagging her about it. do you love her ? is getting your end away the most important thing in your relationship. remember every relationship is differant and we all behave differantly around certain people. she obviosly doesnt feel ready to share that part of her body with you at the moment and you should respect her for that. that doesn mean that she wont ever indulge in the pleasure. she will need to be really turned on to do that and you will need to pay lots of attention to her other erogenous zones. does she like errotic movies that contain some nice anal sex scenes? you could try that to help set the mood. in the meantime just enjoy pleasuring each other.
2006-09-17 22:04:41 · answer #8 · answered by Fallen Angel 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If anal means that much to you tell her that it is a deal breaker. If not, then get over it. I could tell you that you probably have a smaller winkie than her ex has but that would be guessing. Generally, the longer the penis the better it is for the person on the recieving end of the relationship. Perhaps the policeman has a longer nightstick than you do. If not, then perhaps she never liked it, doesn't want to do it again, and doesn't want to have you trying to be the last guy she slept with. You chose whichever explanation makes you feel better.
2006-09-17 21:46:03 · answer #9 · answered by LORD Z 7 · 0⤊ 2⤋
Maybe your equipment is bigger than her ex's so it's too painful for her - not the answer to your problem but at least it might make you feel good! Ask her if her ex had a smaller one than yours and that will give you a clue.
Never mind the kinky stuff, just enjoy what she gives you!
2006-09-18 02:42:33 · answer #10 · answered by Marinersfan 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
look, whatever that had happened between her and the ex is the past. Doing anal with you might open the pages in the book that she chose to close.
She obviously hates her ex bf, and she does not enjoy anal with him. So to be doing anal with you, it actually makes her think back abt the past. Girls will not repeat and do things that they do not enjoy with someone who means a lot to them.
Why are you pressing her to have anal sex? She is actually hurt that you even asked her to do anal. And why are you jealous and comparing yourself to her ex bf? You have a great girl who loves you for who you are, who wants to spend her lifetime with you, and who does not judge you.
If you want more kinkiness in your sex life, you shd talk to her and ask her what is fine with her. Does she enjoy this position? Is she okay with anal? I guess by being honest with you regards to her past sex life blew her off. Instead of appreciating her honesty, you actually brood and think abt matters which are not very important.
You love her, so respect her. What's the deal with anal anyway? I have heard ugly stories abt anal sex. And believe me, anal hurts and not all women love it. Maybe some do, but some do it coz they want to keep their man happy.
Lets say your gf agrees to have anal with you, but are you goin to be happy when she honestly told you in the beginning that she doesn't want to? Isn't that forcing her? She might be pissed off too.
Of course your gf is angry at you, because you don't seem to understand her feelings!!! My advice is stop comparing, love her and don't do anal sex! Its a sin anyway. There are other ways to keep your relationship fun. You're a guy, figure that out. So please stop being irritating and clueless by asking your gf silly questions.
You got a keeper, so appreciate it. Good luck :)
2006-09-17 21:47:44 · answer #11 · answered by NOTurBFF!! 3 · 2⤊ 1⤋