Computer joke, anyone?

Question

One day Bill complained to his friend that his elbow really hurt. His friend suggested that he go toa computer at the drug store that can diagnose anything quicker and cheaper than a doctor.

"Simply put in a sample of your urine and the computer will diagnose your problem and tell you what you can do about it. It only costs $10." Bill figured he had nothing to lose, so he filled a jar with a urine sample and went to the drug store. Finding the computer, he poured in the sample and deposited the $10. The computer started making some noise and various lights started flashing. After abrief pause out popped a small slip of paper on which was printed:"You have tennis elbow.Soak your arm in warm water.Avoid heavy lifting.It will be better in two weeks."

Later that evening while thinking how amazing this new technology was and how it would change medical science forever, he began to wonder if this machine could be fooled.He mixed together some tap water, a stool sample from his dog and urine samples from his wife and daughter. To top it off, he masturbated into the concoction. He went back to the drug store, located the machine, poured in the sample and deposited the $10. The computer again made the usual noise and printed out the following message:

"Your tap water is too hard.Get a water softener.Your dog has worms. Get him vitamins.Your daughter is using cocaine.Put her in a rehabilitation clinic.Your wife is pregnant with twin girls.They arent yours.Get a lawyer.And if you dont stop jerking off, your tennis elbow will never get better."

Answer 1

LMAO - That's a new one, i like that one....that's freakin hillarious! HAHAHAHAHA....sucks to be bill though ;)

Answer 2

Hehehe, Nice.
Life is full of emotions like laughing, smiling, crying, weeping, fear, hatred, jealousy and many more. Out of all these, laughing is loved and liked by all. That is why someone has rightly said, “ You laugh and the world will laugh with u, you weep and you shall weep alone.” Sometimes, life becomes monotonous and one starts getting bored. To remove such monotonousness and boredom, I feel that surfing on the following websites can be helpful in making one cheerful, refreshen up and gain some emotional or psychological energy too. Surf on them and see how helpful these are to you to bring a smile on your face.
http://www.comedycentral.com/jokes/index.jhtml
http://www.ahajokes.com/
http://www.the-jokes.com/
http://www.lotsofjokes.com/
http://www.jokesgallery.com/
http://www.workjoke.com/projoke.htm
http://www.jokes2000.com/
http://yahooligans.yahoo.com/content/jokes/
http://www.xs4all.nl/~jcdverha/scijokes/
http://www.kidsjokes.co.uk/
http://www.ahajokes.com/yo_mama_jokes.html
http://www.allfunnypages.com/funny-jokes/yo-mama-jokes/funny-yo-mama-jokes.htm
http://www.africanjokes.com/africanjokes/?id_category=98
http://www.blonde-jokes.info/
http://www.zelo.com/blonde/index.asp
http://www.indiabook.com/jokes/Entertainment_and_Arts/Bollywood/

Please visit the above pages to find different variety of jokes. I hope, it helps you in making you laugh. Enjoy and have fun..

Answer 3

An oldie but goodie.

Answer 4

Your joke is so cooL

A THUMBS UP FOR YOU!

I REALLY GOTTA EMAIL THIS TO FRIEND!

SO HILARIOUS, SO FUNNY! OMG!


CONGRATULATIONS A 10 FOR YOU!

IT IS SO 100% FUNNY!

THIS WILL BE MY NEW FAVORITE JOKE!

Answer 5

I just found a new favorite section.

Answer 6

thats cool

Answer 7

nice

Answer 8

hahaha

Answer 9

u cool u rock u cool u rock
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Answer 10

heard this before it was not funny then it is not funny now