...OK since he insists they're respectful/well behaved. Their annoying behaviors are rarely done in front of their Dad. Also he works long hrs. Oldest male (21) is worst. Examples: Sons & I home alone; oldest either sings Islamic chants or plays them on CDs in their language all day in our small house. U can't get away from it. 2) He DAILY reads Koran OUT LOUD 3) He interrupts/talks over me in almost every interaction that we have. If he wants U to pass an item to him & U R female/a younger male than him he will literally SNAP HIS FINGERS at U & then point at the item impatiently.
Thank You is rarely said after. The all day/all night religious stuff is extra irritating b/c 21 Y.O. sneakily ordrd porn on our digital cable acct. more than once. This appears hypocritical. If I mention to husband about the porn, interrupting, etc I’m told: “I can’t do anything about it they are over 18." or Why don’t you like my children?! Or "These are my children so it's not yr concern!" OMG help pls?!
2006-09-17 12:56:26 · 17 answers · asked by Anonymous in Society & Culture ➔ Etiquette
It doesn't sound like you have many options. The only thing you can do is leave.
2006-09-17 13:31:34 · answer #1 · answered by Sam 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First, call the cable company and make sure those channels can't be ordered. Then, tell your husband OK. When they come, if they do the snap-and-demand, IGNORE THEM. They WILL LEARN. Give them a room where they can practice their religion. They are now in America, if they're rude, it won't get them anywhere. You need to set ground rules. I.E.: Only 2 hours a day are allowed for any kind of music that you (you, not the sons) don't choose. Females are to be respected. If he cannot abide, he will be forced to move out. There is to be absolutely NO talking over or interrupting. It is rude and inconsiderate. He will do daily chores or will not be allowed privelleges, such as TV. If he does order porn, you will call the police and take criminal action against him. Also, he must file for citizenship and follow through within 4 months of getting here.
2006-09-17 13:38:58 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
What can you do? They ARE his children.
If you can't get along with them, then maybe you two need to get a divorce.
You can't separate a man from his children.
All children are hard to deal with, especially if you are the stepparent.
I suggest you get some books on how to deal with annoying stepchildren.
If his children are over 21, then you have every right to let your husband know that you do not want them living with you long term.
2006-09-17 15:13:45 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to have a family talk and lay down some ground rules. It is your home too, and you do not have to put up with anything you don't agree with. Your husband should back you up.
If the older son needs to listen to his music, then there should be rules like he uses headphones. He should read to himself, not out loud out of respect.
Give them a foot and they will take a mile. Lay down some ground rules before he gets too out of hand.
The major part of this family talk working, is that you have to do your part. That means, and I will give you an example we use with our daughter. If you say they can't do something, then you see them doing it, DO NOT let it go, if you do, they will never take you seriously again. Give them consequences, and stand firm with them. Doesn't matter how old they are, and to me, it sounds like their 13, not in their twenties. Good luck, and don't let it get to you. When they get on your nerves, don't let them know they are on your nerves. Take a hot bubble bath and relax.
2006-09-17 13:33:06 · answer #4 · answered by suchaprettyface11 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My advise is either put up with it or move out. None of it will get any better. It seems to be you are the outsider in the home and they treat you like one. You husband will be on there side always.
They have been taught to do as they please and walk over who they want. So make up your mind to either stay and put up with it or leave and keep your sanity. Good Luck what ever you choose to do.
2006-09-17 13:03:15 · answer #5 · answered by twentyeight7 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
U r intitled to childsupport and alimoy. that's area of the equipment of marring somebody with youngsters is accepting them and tolerating them in the event that they could desire to come to stay with us. yet i might take a stand and set floor rules and if ur newborn is at school, u have the superb to artwork and earn ur own earnings do no longer enable him enable u, to many women have been there and stay because of the fact they do no longer understand the thank you to get out. So b reliable and face up to ur husband if he would not like it tell him there is the door, ur no longer likely to be finished time mom to his youngsters while u have one already to handle.
2016-10-15 02:44:07 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Next time he snaps his fingers shoot him the BIRD! Show & tell these jokers that there not in Kansas anymore Toto! They could either live by my rules or get the hell out. If Daddy don't like it, then his @$$ can hit the bricks also.
2006-09-17 13:05:31 · answer #7 · answered by noname 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Move out! Get a place of your own, tell the husband he can come and visit any time he wants, but you have had it with being an unpaid servant to his sons.
2006-09-17 15:53:23 · answer #8 · answered by old lady 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Okay. Did you and your husband discuss this situation before you married him? Or did he just suddenly spring it on you one day? I would ask for a family meeting, and if your husband is not willing to compromise with you and the boys, I would seriously consider separation, then counselling, and if he opposes that, just separate.
2006-09-17 13:17:20 · answer #9 · answered by Garnet 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Kick the kids out. Why should you be miserable in your own home? Tell your husband it's them or you. Be assertive and shout back!
For your husband not to take your complaints seriously shows how sensitive and caring he is...NOT.
2006-09-17 13:01:12 · answer #10 · answered by Cardinal Richelieu 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
have a family meeting n discus the issue if nothin' happens tell ur husband if they disrespect u again u will take some action...then if they disrespect u just kick them out...remember it's ur house n u must demand respect
2006-09-17 13:02:38 · answer #11 · answered by jls10 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋