What to do with this?

Question

I hope some of you who responded to my earlier question (re. the gf who works 60+ hours/wk) are still answering. I really appreciated the advice and did get somewhere with a conversation. I at least know what is going on a little better. The situation is this: she is hearing a lot of negativity from some of her friends re her true intentions in terms of our relationship. Unfortunately, one is her ex (who I obviously wish she would stop talking to). They still have the same circle of friends and runs into the ex occasionally. My problem is this: the ex cheated on my gf. My gf revealed a lot when we talked, notably that she understood why the ex cheated. This is obviously (I think) preposterous and indefensible. She said she worked a lot (ironic) and pushed the ex away. Question: I want her to know that she can't forgive herself for something that wasn't her fault. How do I do this? I want her to stop talking to her ex, too. Is this reasonable?

Answer 1

It is real obvious that you really care about her. and i think that you are right 100%! And just suggest to her that her ex is not healthy for her emotins. Tell he that you are there for her and that she needs to trust you with the way she feels but also just ask her why is she still talking to her ex? Why would she i mean she has you! You have all the rigt and authority to know why. i mean 60 hours a week of work now that is alot! if possible find out how much she gets paid an hour unless she is on salary and then calculate the hours she went to work and go by the amount of hours she said she worked. Then look at her paycheck and and see if the two add up! but good luck with this i hope i helped with some of your questions

Answer 2

yes she shouldnt be talking to the ex,, he has other motives for talking to her,, scoring with a ex is high points,

but you will never be able to tell her to stop talking to him without her being pissed