I've dated this guy three times. After the third date, I was sure we don't belong tofether. But he kept on contacting and asking me out. Now, I don't want to be rude, but he had made it clear that he wanted to be more than friend. What should I do? I really don't want to hurt his feelings...
2006-09-17 04:38:13 · 11 answers · asked by angela 1 in Society & Culture ➔ Etiquette
He is going to get his feeling hurt no matter how tactful you are. If you do not want to date him any more, then just say so. Be honest with him. Do not spare his feeling o your own destruction.
2006-09-17 04:42:47 · answer #1 · answered by Preacher 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Cut him short if he's already said he wants more then continual contact, even just as friends, could make him feel that there is a chance of more. It can be a dangerous game to play. Hurt his feelings before he hurts you.
2006-09-17 16:31:34 · answer #2 · answered by bob kerr 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Fair enough you don't want to hurt his feelings, but by not being honest with him, you'll hurt them more later on. The more time passes where he thinks you're interested, the more attached he'll get. Then when you do tell him, it'll hurt more.
When being considerate towards him, don't forget to be considerate towards yourself. You've got a life of your own and needs of your own. You can't just go out with someone or keep going out with someone because ending it might hurt their feelings. It's not fair on you. And no, that's not being selfish, it's being honest and sensible.
At the end of the day, you know what to do, you're just scared of doing it.
2006-09-17 11:49:17 · answer #3 · answered by J P 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Unfortunately, his feelings will be hurt no matter what. Just tell him as respectfully and tactfully as you can - "I'm sorry, but I'm just not interested in you that way."
A line that works for me is: "The chemistry just isn't there for me."
I wouldn't try to befriend him. If he's made it clear that he wants more than friendship, and you already know that you don't want more, then it's best to just *nicely* tell him you really don't want to go out.
2006-09-17 12:08:08 · answer #4 · answered by locolady98 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell him the truth as nicely as you can. Maybe something along the lines of "you're a nice guy and I like you, but I can't see this going beyond friendship. I just want to be fair to you." Or something similar. You wouldn't be doing him any favors to continue to date him. You'd also be hurting yourself.
2006-09-17 11:41:33 · answer #5 · answered by Purdey EP 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Respectfully turn him down, and ignore (do not respond with a single word) further requests. He'll get the picture (or maybe you'll eventually have to get a restraining order).
2006-09-17 11:43:49 · answer #6 · answered by Nate 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I've been there done that. Tell him the honest truth. If he doesn't accpet the fact then he isnt worth still being friends with.
2006-09-17 11:45:43 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
ive tried to b nice to guys b4 but all that does is encourage them. just kinda pull back from keeping in contact with him. or b upfront. be like im sorry right now i just dont have time im so busy with work///school///family that i have to focus on that.
2006-09-17 12:30:59 · answer #8 · answered by cecejrg 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just tell him that you would like to be friends, but that you can't see a romantic future for the two of you.
2006-09-17 11:46:03 · answer #9 · answered by kny390 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Be honest. It's better to hurt now than to hurt later.
2006-09-17 13:13:25 · answer #10 · answered by f1utterbyz75 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋