We've been together for only 3 months but ever since I stayed over at his place frequently, things changed. Before we enter a relationship, he seemed to be so nice and sweet. He doesn't drives and would suggest picking me up from my place. But now each time we meet, I'd have to drive to him.. To and fro..45 mins each and alone. During weekdays, I'll drive him to work and then to my work or home to get some changed.
Asking him over to my place have become so difficult. Sometimes, I feel like walking out of this relationship cos I feel "cheated" in a way.. the one I liked initially is the not real him.
i've tried telling him about how I feel about his changes but he doesn't see it as a problem. I'm wondering if I were to end, will I still find myself facing similar problems with another guy?
2006-09-17 02:04:58 · 15 answers · asked by Laetishaa 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Oh sweetie! You will learn as time goes by that you never really know someone until you've been around them for a long time. Its sad but sometimes we think we have found a great guy but as time goes by, they turn out to be very different to how they first acted, some times it can be very disappointing! Trust your instincts ok, because there's not much he can do now, he's comfortable around you so he's not trying as hard to impress you, the way he's acting now is the real him! If you don't like him now then you should leave because he isn't going to get any better. In future try to keep your eyes open and your heart closed until you know a guy really well.
2006-09-17 02:20:50 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
it looks like he's decided it's okay to take a backseat. He makes you drive alone bk n forth? Ok..does he do anythng else redeeming? Is there a balance in giving somewhere else?
if you feel like he's not working at all, consider dumping him. It's only been 3 months. Imagine the comfort and careless level after 10 years.
Since he doesn't see it as a problem, you're pretty much fighting a lost battle.
Hope for a better more loving man in the next fella.
2006-09-17 10:28:56 · answer #2 · answered by Beth 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I dated a guy like this. We lived four hours apart and he kept promising if you drive here this time I will drive there next time. He never did he said the same thing every time. I asked him why did he change and he said because guys that are jerks act sweet to get the girl and once they have her they dont feel like they have to try as hard. If I were you I would lose him. Think about it. If he cared for you enough wouldnt he do what was necessary to drive or find some other arrangement. I know guys that drive four hours every other week to see the one they love.
2006-09-17 09:12:48 · answer #3 · answered by Kay 2 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Basically he lied to you from the get go by acting like a person he was not. Just walk away fromt he relationship he using you. A lot of guys are like that but not all of them. So find you another man that will be true and honest with you. Once you see drastic changes then you should walk away. If he was not truthful with you about himself from the beginning then he will not be truthful with you till the end.
2006-09-17 09:09:55 · answer #4 · answered by souless one 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Every relationship is different and the problems encountered in this one will more than likely never show up again.
It seems to me that maybe his wanting to go out with you was fueled by the fact that you do have a car and you seem to not mind driving him around.
I'd tell him to get the bus from now one and find someone who won't use you.
2006-09-17 09:07:49 · answer #5 · answered by sarah071267 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well, some people do take for granted after a while in a relationship..
If you think that being congruent at the start of the relationship and some time later is important to you, drop this guy.
People who are congruent do exist ;) Good luck!
2006-09-17 09:25:12 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Not all guys are like that but there are more out there. The key is to recognize the signs and to let go when it looks like is getting to be a repeat. Don't give up trying though. There is someone out there that is what you are looking for. The thing is not settling for less.
2006-09-17 09:16:06 · answer #7 · answered by sscott12414 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't have a textbook based answer for this, but it's possible he wants you to prove your devotion by making you always come to him. He is insecure. Address it or leave him. Try to examine yourself for reasons why you would attract someone like this and work to affect a change.
If he works hard, maybe that is another reason this is happening. When he first met you, he was excited to go out of his way to get to know you; now he knows you a little more and can't cut out of work early so much?
Just be careful and use common sense.
2006-09-17 09:09:33 · answer #8 · answered by *babydoll* 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
There are some men whose are very sweet when they trying to win the woman heart. Once they got it, they won't treasure. In fact, it's better he shown his colour now than after married, so that you still can make your choice. Of course, not all men are like that, you will find one, but first thing, you have to make a choice first.
2006-09-18 02:27:37 · answer #9 · answered by Tan D 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
ok...this you can use for the rest of your life...so take notes....guys are like eating in a restaurant....once they get stuffed with food they just want to sit around and watch tv....relationships are the same way....if they are stuffed....they see you all the time with no work or mystery...physically they are fulfilled, and find they are getting what they want in general with no effort on their part...they will get bored and just watch tv....YOU must Never allow a guy to get a gull stomach on you...you must always make them come to you and earn things...you must leave the dinner table after the appetizer sometimes to make them want their dinner more...yes I know this sounds like a game...but it is more psychology...guys like to feel that they had to fight for and win the woman that they are with....if they are just handed everything buffet style...they will eat like a pig and then go to sleep...I would not call this guy for a week or so and make him come after you...if he doesnt..well then you know...and you know next time to mix up your meals better
good luck[
2006-09-17 09:11:53 · answer #10 · answered by Holly F 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋