Ever since I've known my hubby, I've known his bro, and his bro lies alot. He is only 16 and when he lies, one person will get one story and the next person a different story. He tends to tell each person what they want to hear. Or sometimes he'll lie to everyone at once then he'll have to fess up because his story doesn't match when he tells it again. I've talked to my hubby about this because we caught him in a lie yesterday. I told hubby that I can't trust him and he agreed and seemed angry at his bro. I'm VERY hard pressed to trust him at all. I don't know what to do, I can't tell if the kid is BS'ing me or not, until someone gets a different story. Should I take everything he says as a lie or what? I need advice, thanks!
2006-09-17 01:53:51 · 8 answers · asked by All I have to do is dream... 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
I would say that anything important...I would assume he is lying and ask him the same question a week from now to see if his story jives...plus the kid is sixteen and over the next seven years or so is in his primary lying stage overall...I have a brother who is similar and I just always expect him to lie or not come through...that has tended to work for me
2006-09-17 02:00:48 · answer #1 · answered by Holly F 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
i think you should distance yourself from him for a while , if he is in your company talk and be nice , but dont get yourself involved in his life, do not give him the opportunity to lie to you. also talkin to him about it would be good, i know you have probably tried but instead of asking him to be more truthful, tell him that you are not going to entertain his lying anymore and that you do not trust him and that all his lies hurt you very deeply. instead of being angry - show how hurt you are , let him know you love him like a brother but the lies always push you away-tell him when he is ready to be honest and trustworthy , you will be there for him.
his odd stories could also be a sign for attention, have a look at his situation and see if he was or still is getting neglected - often teen agers go through things like this when there is a deeper problem ..i do not think he lies intentioanly i think its attention more then anything else , if you really cae for him - take him out for the day pay more attention to him and tell him you want to develop a trusting bond with him. but if he is clearly keeping up with the lies and is unbearable please distance yourself from him and speak to a cousellor who can help him with his adolocence behaviour.
he is young so there is still a lot of hope for him - kids that age need love - and lying is just another way of wanting to be loved.
2006-09-17 09:07:43 · answer #2 · answered by candystore 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
well he is sixteen so this may be something that he will grow out of, sounds like he is wanting attention. Ask your husband to have a talk with him and ask him why he feels the need to lie all the time. Make sure that he knows that you guys love him and tell your husband to try and spend some time with him like going fishing or playing golf, I really think your brother in law needs attention and he just may need a male to talk to, at sixteen life can be real hard at times. (hormones, emotions, fears, peer pressure) Good luck with that, and remember he is only sixteen so anything that he tells you that is important I personally would double check.
2006-09-17 09:19:15 · answer #3 · answered by angel 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The guy just wants to to feel good when telling all the lies. Just tell the guy to stop the lying acts.
2006-09-17 09:15:10 · answer #4 · answered by CM C 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Talk to him, he needs to be understood by someone. Although as you said he is only 16, so I don't really think it's that abnormal. I did the same at that age.
2006-09-17 09:15:28 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Bust up laughing when he tells a story. That'll show him you're not believing a damn word he says.
2006-09-17 09:23:48 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
He's 16, his older brother is married, maybe he just feels left out.
He'll grow out of it.
2006-09-17 09:00:49 · answer #7 · answered by sarah071267 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
if yer a lawyer den yer definitely a lier!!! dude its a game even if they know they're wrong its all about the money for them silly...
2006-09-17 08:57:36 · answer #8 · answered by Arch 2 · 0⤊ 2⤋