he thinks because i'm living in his house he can do whatever he likes with me i tell him no he does'nt listen if i leave now he will go to jail because i am driving him to work etc he's on probation my kids are older and do not want to move with me back where i come from the uk i'm in the states i so desperately need help i feel so very guilty i don't know what to do serious answers only please
2006-09-17 01:35:47 · 15 answers · asked by Shell 1 in Health ➔ Mental Health
Hmm. Rotton situation. You, at this point got to save yourself and your kids. Dont let your kids grow up and hate you for the rest of their lives bc u chose your ex over them basically. I understand that u want to help him, but you cant help anyone that wont help themself first.
Trust me, the ball is in YOUR court, you are his ticket to a better life so screw him, if hes treating you like crap when your all hes got and you have nothing to loose, leave!!!
Get a place to live maybe away from your ex, invite your kids with loving arms to come live with you again if they please and start OVER!!
2006-09-17 01:46:54 · answer #1 · answered by sillywillyme 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If You Really Want To Get Away Do,
Not to Be Awful If He Goes To Prison Your Children Will Have To Go With You If They Are Under 18yrs,
You Have To Find What Is Best For You And The Children
2006-09-20 10:26:06 · answer #2 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Look. I am here to keep you out of jail and my kids happy. If you don't start leaving me alone, then I will leave anyway. I am doing YOU a favor. SO YOU can keep a job and YOU won't go to jail.
Thats a good idea what messy said.
I'd also add that.. '' the only favor im asking you for is to let me nd the kids stay here, Nothing Else''.
2006-09-17 02:01:53 · answer #3 · answered by Sereniti 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Leave him, take the children with you. Regardless of what they want.
you cant allow yourself to be bullied by this man. He is only saying those things because he thinks your too weak or scared to act against him. Prove him wrong. your kids will understand if you explain how he is treating you. Tell them they or you cant have a normal relationship with him right now and tell them honestly the reasons why. Promise them that they don't have to loose contact with him.
you shouldn't have to worry what happens to him, he is old enough to sort himself out. It all boils down to weather he will choose to or not.
and realistically, how much longer could you live like this before you broke down as a person.
Good luck and remember its for the good of yours and your children's lives, your the one being the responsible parent, he is being very irresponsible. he should never have got in that mess anyway and put you through the things he is.
2006-09-17 01:54:01 · answer #4 · answered by Kerrie-anne 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't need to tell you your situation sucks. Unfortunately, it sounds like as long as you live there he will expect things from you. I'm assuming you sleep in seperate bedrooms. Be firm and stand your ground. Set firm boundaries. However, above all, be good to you. You are no good to your kids if you allow him to have control over you. Don't feel guilty! Did you put a gun to his head and make him drink and drive??? More than likely not ---- so ---- stand up for yourself. Worse case scenario - you leave and your children will soon follow. Take care of you!!!!
2006-09-17 09:29:45 · answer #5 · answered by justme 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Lets be honest, deep down you know the answer. You have to leave. As hard as that sounds you have to. What quality of life are you having just now? None by the sounds of it. Are you still sleeping with him? If you are he's getting everything his way and treating you like a door mat.
Be strong and start a new life, you can do it.
2006-09-17 02:37:11 · answer #6 · answered by Platinum 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
hi
ok serious answers... maybe something will be of use to you, i can only hope..
1. the kids, if they dont want to move to the uk, do they even want to move, or are they happy to live with him, if they are, then buy a 1 birth campa van, or anything, and move into that.
2 so you have to take the kids to, and they hate him as much as you, trailer park? surely livin in a hole, is better than livin with an assh***
3 maybe you need to discuss it with the kids... tell them what hes doing to you, be precise, not devisive.. maybe then they will b more happy to go
i want to know, the nationality of the kids, if they like their dad, how bad it is... whos house it is..
2006-09-17 06:42:14 · answer #7 · answered by yeah well 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell him like it is. Say:
Look. I am here to keep you out of jail and my kids happy. If you don't start leaving me alone, then I will leave anyway. I am doing YOU a favor. SO YOU can keep a job and YOU won't go to jail.
2006-09-17 01:41:14 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 4⤊ 0⤋
let himwipe up his own mess and don't allow him to treat you like a doormat. your too soft. try and get enough money together to rent a place nearby where you can see your kids as you please. don't distance yourself from them.when ex hubby realises he needs you more then you need him he'll hopefully learn the error of his ways and give youthe self respect you so deserve. find the courage and make your move. he made the mess let him clean it up.
2006-09-17 01:47:17 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
So what, give way.
If you keep on going the way you are you're just going to get more stuck and more unhappy. Stop protecting him. Start doing things for yourself.
2006-09-17 02:04:47 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋