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A man escapes from prison where he has been for 15 years. He breaks into a house to look for money and guns and finds a young couple in bed.

He orders the guy out of bed and ties him to a chair, while tying the girl to the bed he gets on top of her, kisses her neck, then gets up and goes into the bathroom. While he's in there, the husband tells his wife:

"Listen, this guy's an escaped convict, look at his clothes! He probably spent lots of time in jail and hasn't seen a woman in years. I saw how he kissed your neck." If he wants sex, don't resist, don't complain, do whatever he tells you. Satisfy him no matter how much he nauseates you. This guy is probably very dangerous. If he gets angry, he'll kill us. Be strong, honey. I love you."

To which his wife responds: "He wasn't kissing my neck. He wwas whispering in my ear. He told me he was gay, thought you were cute, and asked me if we had any vaseline. I told him it was in the bathroom. Be strong honey. I love you too!!"

2006-09-16 21:24:16 · 16 answers · asked by rahimabdul2006 1 in Entertainment & Music Jokes & Riddles

16 answers

FUNNY!

2006-09-16 21:25:37 · answer #1 · answered by Selly-Silly 2 · 0 0

ha ha ha!1..... funny one dude! a 1en out 0f 10 for youu\!!

and a joke 4 u!

24 Fun Things To Do In An Elevator...
1. Grimace painfully while smacking your forehead and muttering: "Shut up, dammit, all of you just shut UP!"
2. Whistle the first seven notes of "It's a Small World" incessantly.
3. Crack open your briefcase or purse, and while peering inside ask: "Got enough air in there?"
4. Offer name tags to everyone getting on the elevator. Wear yours upside-down.
5. Stand silent and motionless in the corner, facing the wall, without getting off.
6. When arriving at your floor, grunt and strain to yank the doors open, then act embarrassed when they open by themselves.
7. Greet everyone getting on the elevator with a warm handshake and ask them to call you Admiral.
8. On the highest floor, hold the door open and demand that it stay open until you hear the penny you dropped down the shaft go "plink" at the bottom.
9. Stare, grinning, at another passenger for a while, and then announce: "I've got new socks on!"
10. When at least 8 people have boarded, moan from the back: "Oh, no, not now, damn motion sickness!"
11. Meow occasionally.
12. Holler "Chutes away!" whenever the elevator descends.
13. Walk on with a cooler that says "human head" on the side.
14. Stare at another passenger for a while, then announce "You're one of THEM!" and move to the far corner of the elevator.
15. Wear a puppet on your hand and talk to other passengers "through" it.
16. When the elevator is silent, look around and ask "is that your beeper?"
17. Say "Ding!" at each floor.
18. Say "I wonder what all these do" and push the red buttons.
19. Listen to the elevator walls with a stethoscope.
20. Draw a little square on the floor with chalk and announce to the other passengers that this is your "personal space."
21. Announce in a demonic voice: "I must find a more suitable host body."
22. Make explosion noises when anyone presses a button.
23. Wear "X-Ray Specs" and leer suggestively at other passengers.
24. Stop at every floor, run off the elevator, then run back on.

2006-09-16 21:27:28 · answer #2 · answered by ~♥Andrea♥~ 3 · 1 2

Serves the husband right

2006-09-16 21:29:27 · answer #3 · answered by auburn 7 · 0 0

That's a good one. She must of wanted to get back at her husband for something she caught him doing.

Thanks,

Beverly Smith

2006-09-17 01:22:36 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

Uh-Oh! LOL. When the shoe is on the other foot............ LOL.

Have a nice Sunday, and a great new week!

2006-09-17 01:23:15 · answer #5 · answered by jfmm 7 · 0 0

lmao

2006-09-17 04:17:02 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

Not dirty... if thats the question. funny.

2006-09-16 21:28:14 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

That's awsome.

2006-09-16 21:48:13 · answer #8 · answered by Reject187 4 · 0 0

good one

2006-09-16 21:46:26 · answer #9 · answered by amir khan 3 · 0 0

LMAO!!! NOW THAT WAS FUNNY,THANKS< I NEEDED THAT!!!

2006-09-16 21:28:21 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

hahaha...heard it before but it's still funny!!!thanks!!!lol...

2006-09-16 21:28:10 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

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