Why Can't I spank ....as long as I do not BEAT?

Question

I know, and am NOT in favor of beating kids for doing unaceptable things, but I am in favor of spanking kids on their BEHINDS sometime!. I'm telling you. Sometimes I watch the behavior of kids with BOTH their mothers and fathers in stores, malls, parking lots! Some of them are SO uncontrollable. Yet the parents coddle them and literally ACCEPT their behavior. Im 23. I'm not married yet but when I marry and have kids, I want the ability to be able to spank them if needed.
I hear this is against the law. I hope I have the abiliity to enforce discipline without spanking. I really do. Parenting is one hell of a job.

Answer 1

Hitting a child teaches the child that you have the power to control through violence. Lots of children grow up and use what they think is the "power to control through violence". They learned violence in the name of discipline. That is not good.

One of the best ways I have seen children learn is by example. If you are a whole person because you have dealt with your past in a healthy way, your children will see your healthy actions and try to imitate them.

There are many ways to discipline a child that work. Why not take some parenting classes now before you get married and have children. This way you can learn different methods to help your children have self control.

Each child is different and it is harder for some children to "be still and quiet". When I was a child, adults verbally abused children by saying "children should be seen and not heard". Self expression of their emotions (energy in motion) is a great thing for a child. They need to be able to express themselves and know it is ok. Self expression helps them grow.

They also need to learn limits and boundaries. Hitting teaches fear and that if I don't get what I want from a person, I can cause them pain.

In parenting classes, you will be able to see the different stages a human being goes through trying to grow up as well as behaviors that should be not only expected but welcomed for their health and growth.

These classes should help you appreciate that your children are just tiny people trying to grow.

When the Bible says spare the rod, it means the rod of discipline. We must be balanced when it comes to that scripture. In Biblical times people killed children for being disrespectful. That is and was not right. Discipline should bring correction not pain.

Children are people who deserve kindness.

Answer 2

I believe that a child should never have a hand raised to him/her unless it's to shake hands. Under extreme circumatances, such as the child being seconds away from sticking a fork in to an electric outlet, would a stragetically placed spank on the behind be acceptable. As for uncontrollable kids, that depends on the parents and their ability to control at least the situation, if not the child. That's just my opinion; nothing more. If the child gets rowdy in a public place and will not mind you, just pick him/her up and calmly walk out of the store and go home without the toy you promised to buy if he/she would be good.

My 2-year old daughter sometimes gets out of hand and I've had to remove her from the stores a few times. She is slowly (I stress slowly) learning that it is unacceptable behavior. Aside from that, she's a sweet and brilliant kid for her age-which to sum it up would be your average two-year-old.

Parenting is not only one hell of a job, but it is very trying, frustrating and yet the best 'job' one can have in this world. I have learned to have the patience of a saint when it comes to parenting. Until I became a father, I was very impatient, so that was the biggest adjustment for me.

I hope you find my little rant somewhat insightful.

Answer 3

If the child is raised in a Muslim home, it's good to train them to give and take their beatings regularly. No time to instill those values of violence like when they are young and impressionable. You might even want to purchase some electronic shock collars just to show them the difference in a spanking, a beating, or being tortured. Oddly enough children have trouble differentiating one form of abuse from the other. A spanking is a method of control/abuse used by parents that can't figure out a way to raise a child without violence. And yes, child abuse is illegal. Proper parenting isn't hard, and the reward is in the giving of your love to a child that you can be proud of when they are grown.

I don't mean to sound cruel, and I really wish you the best in your years ahead.

Answer 4

In most counties, spanking is NOT against the law. Some countries, provinces or states may impose restrictions, but its still lawful, as it should be.

In Canada, a parent can use reasonable physical punishment as long as it does not harm the child. Any results from a spanking must be transitory in nature. If this confuses you, join the club.

I spank; my neighbours know it, the school knows it and my kids sure know it.

I have been asked by the kids how to avoid it. I answer, try behaving. It works wonders.

Answer 5

I know what you mean. People really glare when you spank in public--I'm one of them. You can get into real trouble, too, since security cam can be used against you in court.

The favourite is the time out. Find a quiet corner and make the little brat stand there until they can get themselves under control. A fave phrase? "I got all the time in the world."

No time? The flick or pinch can work nicely. An effective deterrent in either case, and not as brutal as spanking.

Don't worry, you'll manage. And I totally guarantee your perspective will change once you are a mom.

Answer 6

Its not against the law i have 2 kids who are very well mannered because they know i will bust their bottom i can't stand to see a parent cowering to a whiny kid that really needs to be made to mind. Although today i saw a man slap his child right in the mouth now i do not know what the kid has said or done but i do not agree with that not at the age the child was anyway.

Answer 7

the law has no authority when it comes to raising your kids as long as you dont beat them or leave bruises but a slap on the *** or the hand is fine it doesnt kill them or cause them permanent damage. I have a 2 and a half year old (and a 6 month old) and i have tried to disipline him with words but spanking is the only thing that makes him listen

Answer 8

i don't know what the law says about spanking my children but how else are you supposed to discipline them. my parents spanked me and i responded and i listened to them. i think that as long as you don't leave marks or bruises on your kids, spanking is totally acceptable. its in the bible.