I have a question? This is for the ladies. My girlfriend and I have been living together almost four months. I found out she had sex a few times with a friend of hers after she moved in with me. She is now pregnant, but we don’t know who the babies daddy is, me or the man she was cheating on me with. And no there was no infidelity or abuse on my part to make her do it. Now the guy (and his mother calls to try and get here to leave me and be with her son) calls her on our phone when im not here, to see how she doing and to see if she needs anything. My girlfriend thinks its ok for this guy to call, it means he cares about the baby and if she stopped him from calling he want anything to do with the baby or at best he wont want to cooperate with her when it comes to the baby, if its his…..what do I think, h@ll no. don’t call here. Call him only if the baby ends up being his, I’m feed up……so LADIES TELL ME WHAT YOU THINK.
2006-09-16 16:02:20 · 24 answers · asked by jj 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Well firstly doesnt matter which way you look at it....she cheated on you...on those grounds alone i would end the relationship and look for someone more deserving of you.
As for the baby...theres not much you can do now...wait until the baby is born and then get a paternity test....if its yours then you will need to fulfill your obligation to the baby
if its the other guys then move on and leave her behind.
good luck
2006-09-16 16:06:09 · answer #1 · answered by askaway 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
aww I'm sorry to hear that you're in a situation like that. Best thing I can say is get a blood test as soon as the baby's born. I feel that if she is with you and still your girlfriend and living with you then she should respect the fact that your her man. It's not a good ide for him to be contacting her and things like that cuz what happens if the babies yours? Then he's just been interfering with your relationship for the enitre pregnancy. Don't let him ruin what you and her have and if you love her then you might want to think of being with her regardless if you're the father or not. Let her know that you'll be there now and after if that's how you feel, where as the other man only wants to be there if he is the father. Be supportive but don't let her take advantage of you and walk all over u, Dats not fair to you.
2006-09-16 16:08:15 · answer #2 · answered by ♥Shortie♥ 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Okay...FIRST OF ALL, LET'S STOP RIGHT HERE...IF YOUR SO-CALLED GIRLFRIEND WAS OUT THERE SLEEPING AROUND BEHIND YOUR BACK, AND NOW IT'S POSSIBLE THAT HER BABY MIGHT NOT BE YOURS - THEN, HELL, MAN - SHE WAS HAVING UNPROTECTED SEX WITH SOMEBODY OTHER THAN YOU. YOU NEED TO GET YOUR *** TO THE DOCTOR AND GET AN AIDS TEST, AND ASK FOR A VDRL (OR ALSO CALLED AN RPR PANEL)..TO TEST FOR STD'S!!!!! MY FRIEND, AIDS IS OUT THERE, AND IT'S TAKING NO PRISONERS!!! IF YOU BECOME INFECTED BECAUSE YOUR GIRL CAN'T KEEP HER LEGS CLOSED WHEN YOU'RE NOT AROUND...THEN YOU HAVE MUCH MORE SERIOUS PROBLEMS THAN "WHO'S THE BABY'S DADDY!!! That having been said...well, here's what I think. If she has cheated on you and is now pregnant...and if the man she cheated with AND his mother feel free to call YOUR place to talk to your girlfriend - it's because she has ALLOWED them to do so. It sounds to me like she is enjoying this situation. Of course, I don't know all of the details, but as a woman myself (who has been cheated on by my husband, as well)...I think that if this were MY problem - I'd put my foot down, and let your girlfriend, her OTHER LOVER, his mother, and the horse they all rode in on know right now that this sh*t is gonna stop - and stop right now. If the man's mother is all involved like this, then maybe they all know something you don't! Please don't sign any birth certificate or other binding documents until you have had an official paternity test. No matter who the real father is...the man whose name is on the birth certificate is the man who will be legally responsible for child support payments - and she can enforce that fact, and you'll be giving her money to help raise another man's baby - and they'll both enjoy spending it.
2006-09-16 16:42:29 · answer #3 · answered by believer937 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your girlfriend cheated on you and yet you stay with her? More than that, she's prego and it may not be yours? I would leave her a s s and let her have the other man. You don't deserve someone who will cheat on you. But after the baby is born, and it proved to be yours, then stay in the child's life if at all possible. If it's proved NOT to be yours, then just walk away and never look back.
2006-09-16 16:15:45 · answer #4 · answered by sweetgurl13069 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What a mess. The only answer is a paternity test. That will give you the truth.
To be honest, even if it is yours, this woman doesn't sound very trustworthy, or very smart. You live there too and also have a right to say who's calling your home. If it's his, fine. If not, it's your home. Even if he gets an attitude, if it's his, he's liable for child support anyway.
Stand up for yourself, honey. Good luck.
2006-09-16 16:20:21 · answer #5 · answered by Nightlight 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Move out. She is playing you for a fool. After the baby is born get a paternity test. Whatever you don, Don't sign the birth certificate. She is bad news and will cheat again. Why are you hanging onto such a lowdown person?
2006-09-16 16:05:23 · answer #6 · answered by notyou311 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I aint no chick, but let me tell ya,,you're being played a fool. Unless she ceases all contact with this other dude, send her home to mama. In nine months or so, you'll be able to find out the truth. Obviously, she still cares for this other guy. Life is too short to be driving yourself crazy over a girl. There's some good ones out there...they are just hard to find.
2006-09-16 16:10:54 · answer #7 · answered by unclewill67 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Leave. She has no respect for you. After the DNA test, if you find out that it is yours, support your child, but leave the mama alone. If it is not yours, GOOD!!! Either way, find someone who really loves and respects you because you seem to be a very nice guy. There are a lot of single ladies out there looking for someone like you!
2006-09-16 16:08:57 · answer #8 · answered by Faith In The House 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Personally, I think that your girlfriend still has an attachment to the other guy. I am glad that your girlfriend is doing what she can do to maintain a "relationship" with the other guy, but when doing so, the relationship will become more complicated for all three individuals involved. You need to sit down and talk to your girlfriend and find out if she does have feelings for this other guy, if that is the case, you will need to step down and let her sort things out for herself. That doesn't mean you can't talk to her or be with her, but this is a decision she needs to make without outside influences.
2006-09-16 16:07:51 · answer #9 · answered by KG 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
If you want to know who the father is, get blood tests done. It might not belong to either one of you. I wouldn't think you would be surprised she had sex with another guy, her behavior with you shows she obviously wasn't waiting for marriage. Unless you are willing to "share" her for the rest of your relationship, and support other guys kids, encourage her to go to the other guy and consider yourself lucky. But then again, I think a guy who asks a girl to "move in" to met his physical needs, wihout the respect of marriage, isn't much of a deal either...so maybe you make a good couple after all.
2006-09-16 16:22:05 · answer #10 · answered by Dan 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋