I love a guy but he doesn't really know how i feel for him. we are very close friends
he has told me he loved me b4 but i wasnt ready at that time.now he has a girlfriend. these past few days he has been having some problems with her. i don't know what he feels for me . should i trouble him by telling him i realised that i love him? or should i keep it to myself?
2006-09-16 00:18:37 · 21 answers · asked by fed up 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
he told me his feelings for me months ago and then after that , now i learned he just got a girlfriend but when i asked him about his gf, he tells me he just doesn't want to talk about her. is his gf real? or is he just making me jealous??
2006-09-16 00:45:36 · update #1
tell him. he might feel the same
2006-09-16 00:20:55 · answer #1 · answered by russellhamuk 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
A difficult position you've found yourself in. To be honest, I've been on the other side before.
If he's not happy in the relationship he's in, things will run their course. But if he doesn't know, will they?
At the same time, you don't want him to leave a relationship where he is happy for something that might not work. I know that's not really what you want to be thinking about right now but it's a possibility.
People in relationships have problems, this is the way of life. Stronger relationships show themselves by how well the problems are worked out. Others break down during problems. Trying to force the relationship to break down will only cause you and everyone else involved problems and heartache. Forcing the issue would be dangerous.
You could be a good friend right now and he might well need one. If you just explain that you're around if he needs to talk or needs a hug, he might explain everything and realise himself that it's practically over. On the other hand, things might be just a little bit rocky and he might realise that the bumpy ride is just par for the course and the show must go on.
Love is a complicated and broad emotion. I love my mum and I love my girlfriend but both are completely different. I love my best friend and she loves me but that's different too. I couldn't have the same relationship with my best friend as I do with my girlfriend, it just doesn't work like that for us.
Have a long and deep think about how you feel for him. Where in the vast arena of emotions do your feelings for him fit? Maybe you don't know yet, don't worry, that happens.
I think you and him need to have a talk. Be weary of coming right out and saying "Hey, by the way I love you. How was work?", you could ruin everything. If that's the way you want to play it and you think it could work for you, that's your choice. Everything you do in this situation is up to you and nobody should tell you how to play it.
You might want to explain that you care about him, which it sounds like you do because if you were being selfish, you'd have jumped in there already, regardless of how much he and his current girlfriend got hurt.
Talk to this guy, if he's worth your time he'll be happy to anyway. Find out where he and his girlfriend are and how bad these problems really are. Work it out as you go, be careful, take care of yourself and him. Don't forget that the third person in all this, his current girlfriend, is a person too. You don't want to unnecessarily hurt her too more than the situation already is.
I hope it works out for you soon.
froggie
2006-09-16 00:43:45 · answer #2 · answered by froggiezebra 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't tell him. If you tell him at this stage when he has problems with his girlfriend he'll just kiss you and more because he is on a rebound but in the end if things cool off with his girlfriend he might realise that he still has feelings for her and go back to her, then what? You're the one who'll end up with a borken heart. Let it go. If you really want to tell him, tell him later but not now or you'll just add on to his problems.
2006-09-16 00:47:43 · answer #3 · answered by sweetdivine 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
first of all if he has told you he loves you and then got another girlfriend...it seems like you might have takin it the wrong way....or hes trying to get in your pants....but of course im probably wrong...anyhow...try to think of what might happen if you do or don't tell him...when you are done thinking of as many possibilites...then just see if the good ones outway the bad...most likely you're feelings about the situation would give an influence on what kind of scenerios you develope but that would just further help your decision...if i were you i wouldnt do anything and just forget about wanting to be with him...because it wont work out...no matter what...it nevers ends happily...
2006-09-16 00:35:30 · answer #4 · answered by narfanator 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What a conundrum. If you tell him he might think you are trying to force him into something but if you dont then he might stay with this other girl and be unhappy.
Go for it, might as well get it out in the open
2006-09-16 00:22:32 · answer #5 · answered by poli_b2001 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tel him how you feel. He might be on a rollercoaster because of the girlfriend but if you feel the same way, it will work out.
2006-09-16 01:34:10 · answer #6 · answered by True Blue Brit 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you really believe that he is worth it then you must tell him. But make you sure your feeling are for real not just because he's now not available. If they are then tell him. Good luck
2006-09-16 00:27:16 · answer #7 · answered by Mattie 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Now this one is complicated, well if he's having problem's wit his gf then here's an opportunity for be the girl that's always there for him and be the one who never let's him down. guy's are simple creatures so show us affection and we yours for the taking.
P.S. always follow your heart
2006-09-16 00:59:32 · answer #8 · answered by MILAN N 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell him but make sure of your feelings first, make sure not just jealous because he's found someone else
2006-09-16 01:29:09 · answer #9 · answered by chickadee 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ya this is the right time alright!! And ask him to meet you at somewhere first then start talking (it must be you and him alone)
2006-09-16 00:25:47 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Toughie..
If you tell him, it may add to his problems he already has, If you don't you may well miss out altogether.
Personally, I would say something, but say that you don't want to pile anymore on his plate, and you want to let him know how you feel..
2006-09-16 00:22:12 · answer #11 · answered by J4xxs 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋