i have lived with my gf for 15 yrs and she hasnt had sex with me for 4 yrs cos i spoke to another girl at work and got emotionally involved but nothing ever happened, my gf always comes up with an excuse, but she says she loves me and fancies me, we have a joint mortgage and are effevtively married what should i do, i need some physical affection now
2006-09-16 00:12:35 · 24 answers · asked by johnny 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Talk to her. Its pretty selfish, but perhaps she wants the physical side of the relationship back as well, but doesn't know how to broach it. Make it obvious that she can trust you, then talk it through, take it slowly and don't pressure her.
If she can't get over the small incident that happened 4yrs ago, then you need to decide if you are happy to stay in a loving but non physical relationship, or move on.
You both may need to see a therapist. She may have built sex up into something very scary, that may need some encouragement to gain perspective.
2006-09-16 01:24:18 · answer #1 · answered by As You Like It 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
4 years!!! 4 months is too long, I can't imagine how difficult it must be to want someone and not being able to have them. I think she is using the situation as an excuse not to have sex. You need to sort out as it will eat away at you and you will end up going elsewhere. In honesty it sounds like you are only together because of the mortgage. Lifes too short mate!
2006-09-16 00:23:24 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Talk to your girlfriend and ask her what is really the prob. Maybe since you two have a mortgage and all together she feels obligated to stay, but i believe there are other issues besides just the one inncodent you had with talking to this other girl. Level with her, tell her how you feel and if she dosent seem interested in you as far as sex it might be better to split just for awhile to see if the relationship is still what you two really wont. What ever you guys deside good luck to the both of you.
2006-09-16 00:24:00 · answer #3 · answered by needsum 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'd tell her if she doesn't start giving it up, then you have to hit the road, You can't live your whole life with this hanging over your head. It's way past time for her to either leave you or get over it. Let her know that you are going to have to look elsewhere and if she still doesn't want ex, ask her how she feels about being in an open relationship because you love her and don't want to leave her, but really really need sex.
2006-09-16 00:18:39 · answer #4 · answered by t.larae 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
speaking from personal experiance, my EX of 17 years didnt have sex with me for 5 years and there is only so much a man can take, i also want some physical affection so i plucked up the courage and dumped her, now i'm haveing the time of my life, i have also found a new girl friend who is just great, so my advise would be to dump her and get on with your life, i have and its great.
2006-09-16 01:28:25 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You've got to be kidding!
4 years????????
Leave her before you have another affair and she makes you wait even longer!
If she asks why, just tell her you "love her & fancy her" but you have needs that she's not meeting. It's only natural to want sex.
I bet she's the one seeing someone else and making you feel guilty for it.
Do you really believe she hasn't had sex for 4 years? She has!
She just hasn't had sex WITH YOU!!!!!!!!!!!
Sorry, pal, but you need some lovin', like ~ NOW!!!!!!!
2006-09-16 00:19:30 · answer #6 · answered by Mary* 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Pleas stop posting the same f**king questions over and over. The simple fact that you are staying with a woman who hasn't given you any sex in 4 years, come on...
2006-09-16 03:33:35 · answer #7 · answered by Richard C 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Depending on ur age and trust of one another has alot to do with ur future and romance. I talk to other women and even flurt. I am trusted by my wife and love her dearly as she also trust me. Often she does'nt waunt sex and out of respect and true love I resort to masterbateration. After all a climax normally last 2-6 sec's. ask yourself. is it true love or lust?
2006-09-16 00:26:45 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ya. You should have thought about that before you became emotionally involved with another woman. Serves you right.
2006-09-16 00:14:47 · answer #9 · answered by t-bomb 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
talk to her that 4 years are too long years to wait and that you need her physical affection badly...though i find it odd that this thing really happened to real life...do you think she still loves you?
2006-09-16 00:18:10 · answer #10 · answered by chona a 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋