Has anyone here ever had their dad beat on them or do other?

Question

things dads should never do to their daughters? If so how did you handle this? What if your mom may be already aware of it and did nothing to prevent it? Or could it have been very bad nightmares going on? Is it at all possible to have nightmares like this and to think its all real? Oh btw its not me its for a friend of mine whos asking and shes older now but still is mixed up so much on so many things in her past...now the hitting is real but shes not sure on the rest of it?

Answer 1

The experience of previous events can be interpreted through the psyche in all sorts of different ways. I was afraid of my father calling my name up to the age of 18, no joke. I didn't figure why until i confronted the isue myself.

..if she gives mutiple versions of what happened on specific occasions, then she probably isn't telling the truth- for whatever reason. Like, dunno "I thought it was a dream but it was real" and mixing it up, thats just confusing, its important to recognise that because to makeup stories and religiously push them through as real is in itself a disorder.

If she's unsure that it's actualy happened, then there's sometimes evidence; hospital x-ray appointments, suspicious photographs, journals that sort of thing. Yes beating can inflict severe trauma and tear someone's mind apart, but generally we're resilient to that by suppressing memories which are expressed unconsciously. If you're looking for something horrible in the past, do you really want to find it?

Another thing: dreams and nightmares are complicated, and they don't have to mean anything about real life! I dreamt of a bleeding doll last night - and I've never had any actual first hand experience of that happening, although I did watch some gory bits of the butterfly effect last night.. a repetition of an exact, specific nightmare is quite uncommon and could mean a number of things.

Answer 2

I think when terrible things happen to us, we like to think it didnt. Especially where fathers and children are concerned. Fathers are supposed to protect their children, not hurt them, So I can understand why this girl is confused. I doubt very much whether they are nightmares considering he is beating her.

The only way this young girl will be able to be helped is if she seeks some professional guidance. You dont say what the terrible thing is that she is thinking her father has done.

May I suggest, the first person this girl contacts is the sexual assault service in her local area. They are qualified and experienced people who deal with this kind of thing all the time.
Whether it did happen or not, she needs some professional help to sort it out. It is very non threatening environment and all they want to do is help. She needs some help desperately, she is being abused...her father is beating her...thats abuse, and I am guessing the abuse she may think is a nightmare is sexual abuse.

Maybe the Mom isnt aware of it, or if she is, she probably is like the daughter and thinking its not happening. No-one likes to think this is happening in their own lives...they always think it happens to someone else but never them.

This young girl would be as confused as hell and she needs all the support she can get...she may not want to go as far as what I suggested, but if she doesnt get some professional help soon she will end up in all sorts of trouble.

I have worked with youth for the past 25 years...I have seen what happens to young kids who have come from an abusive home life. There are too many issues to discuss on here....this young girl is going through a mass of emotional turmoil...nothing is sitting right in her head. Parents are supposed to love and protect their kids...this is not happening in her life.....she needs to know it is not her fault for a start. She is the child...the father and mother are the adults....she has done nothing to make her father this way. Her father has probably always been this way and I would guess has come from an abusive household himself.

I feel for this young girl, and she really needs every ounze of support...if she doesnt feel confident enough to go talk to a professional person, then ring up a crisis line...although if her father is the perpetrator then he is not going to allow her to get any help...he doesnt want anyone to know.

If she is going to get the help she needs, she will have to do it without her father or her mother knowing, especially if she thinks her mother knows what is and has happened. She needs to go to a trusted friends house, even if its not overnight, just for the day even, and ring the crisis hotline.

I cant stress enough that she needs this help now...dont wait, it will only get worse. With guidance it can all be sorted out, but she needs a professional person who can guide her in what steps she needs to take. A good counsellor will only be interested in her frame of mind and trying to help her get through this terrible confusing time. The fear and the confusion this young girl is suffering you can only imagine...Please talk to her, if she wont do anything, maybe you yourself can ring a crisis line and tell them what this girl has told you, so as you will have a lot more information on the best thing to do for your friend.

Please be quick, dont delay, the future of this young girl is at stake.

Answer 3

Dreams can sometimes be real experiences in the spirit
world. My Father never beat me, but he did clobber good,
quite often. Because I was his favorite, and I loved him, and was
always the closest to him when he blew up.
To this day, even though he is a harmless man with alzhiemers,
I still have dreams where we fight and I stab him and all kinds
of things.
If your experiences are happening in real time. You need to get
someone to help. There are shelters that help women that
are being hurt by someone. Talk to someone there, and let
them know your situation. They will understand you're not
wanting to confront your parents right away because you have to live there. And it will be a place you can go to if you decide to
do something about it.

Answer 4

My dad, no. My dad was an alcoholic though.

My mother used to beat and sexually molest me.

My older brother he was a steroid user used to beat me violently.

I couldn't get any help because my family was messed up except for me.

My sister was a control freak, excercise junkie and bulimic who loved to inflict pain on others however she could.

I had to endure years of this pain knowing this wasn't how life should be and the rest of my satanic family just thought I was the weirdo outsider.

Maybe there is help out there I was the youngest and felt powerless and just couldn't find any help in the small town i lived in.

Now, answer my question plz:

http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index;_ylt=AoH21kpMEjq2PIQCyCew8NTsy6IX?qid=20060916005130AAMQyQA

Answer 5

I, too, had an abusive Dad. My sister fought to have us put into a foster home, but my brother was too afraid to testify against my Dad, so we wound up staying there. It wasn't until my brother stuck a shotgun up my sleeping Dad's nose & told him if he ever drew blood on me again, my brother would kill him that the abuse stopped.
My stepmother was aware of the abuse, too.
Your friend may want to go talk to her Priest or Rabbi or school counselor. Some good listening ears can help her process her emotions.

Answer 6

When I was a kid my father used a board , belt , hand , or what ever on me. Mom knew about it. I never had nightmares about it. After my mom and dad seperated mom said she was sorry . Then they divorsed Dad never did say he was sorry. I am close to my mom but not my dad.

Answer 7

you could be describing my life. i've been in therapy for many years because of it and will probably be for many more. i have forgiven my father for everything he has done but i am having a hard time forgiving my mother for not protecting me even though she was fully aware of everything he was doing. your friend should seek professional help to deal with what happened to her.