My girlfriend still likes her first love and actually said "I don't think it's right that I'm with you" I know she loves me, but she still has feelings for the first kid to give her compliments and all that ****.. he doesn't even like her...but she has these feelings for him.... What can I do to convince her that she doesn't need him (he did somethign really bad to her) and that she'll be better off with me? That she'll forget bout him eventually..
2006-09-15 17:01:57 · 20 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
well ive known her for like 2 years.. we were friends before we became boyfriend girlfriend..... thanks for all the answers... well she was never with him... and f u ck you to the guy that called her a hoe... anyways its not that simple i cant get over her, i love her, and i know if i left she'd be heartbroken as well.... i just think she's under the impression she loves him also.... and think shes really just infuated with the idea.....
2006-09-15 17:09:54 · update #1
You're girlfriend is trying to overlook all the bad that her first love did. She thinks she is hurting him by leaving him. Tell her how much you love her, and how sad you'd be if she left you for him.
Its really common for one to take for granted what one already has, such as a boyfriend, and think more about what one had, such as an ex-boyfriend.
2006-09-15 17:03:56 · answer #1 · answered by Manan T 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She prob still feels she needs approval from her first love. You know, how cos things din work out and so she will always have that unresolved question in her heart - Why? What if?
First loves are like that. The memories linger.
There's really nothing you can do to change how a person thinks or feels. Something just needs to click within herself.
And since she actually said she doesn't think it's right being with you - i think you should take it as it is and not remain in this entanglement.
2006-09-15 17:07:40 · answer #2 · answered by Beth 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Oh wow, I was SO that girl once. There is nothing you can do to convince her that she is better off with you. What you can do is let her know how you feel. Maybe tell her something to snap her into reality. Tell her that you appreciate the love she had for the guy she used to be with but it's belittling to the relationship you are trying to build with her for her to keep it in the present.
Let her know you aren't asking her to forget about him but you are asking her to put it in a respectful place of honor in her past and move forward with you.
If she doesn't want to and insists on bringing him into your relationship perhaps she's not ready for the kind of love you have to offer.
Good LUCK!
2006-09-15 17:06:07 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
most girls have a thing for their first love. they never forget them. just be supportive to your girlfriend and don't act jealous. she will eventually get over him.
do the best you can at treating her right and being a good man. if she doesn't appreciate that, find a new girl that does.
On the flip side lots of girls like guys that treat them bad because the girls have no self esteem. if she constantly talks about this guy and keeps saying you shouldn't be together then tell her you think so too and dump her.
2006-09-15 17:05:51 · answer #4 · answered by Trevor B 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You shouldn't have to convince her. She should see that for herself. If she can't even control her own feelings or get over the other guy, you can't do it for her or convince her. I say give her some space... let her figure out what she really wants... because it's not fair to you to be playing the part of second-choice. You should be with a girl that loves you just as much as you love her.
2006-09-15 17:05:25 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do you really want to be with someone like this. I do not think so, no matter how much time passes she will always be thinking about him. So I think you should leave now before you get into deep with her. This is bad new no matter how you look at it. Move on and find a girl who loves you for you, and not one else.
2006-09-15 17:04:22 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Bad read on whom she likes. She isn't ready/ripe yet because she hasn't worked into/through the pain of the first break-up. What you want to give her is a painless transition, but it doesn't work that way.
If you love her, be her FRIEND until she is emotionally free to be much more.
2006-09-15 17:06:09 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You cant. you shouldn't want to be with someone who doesn't want to be with you anyway. You are just the rebound guy. if her ex wants her back, she will go. If she doesn't realize that he is not right for her now, she never will get over him and you will always be second best
2006-09-15 17:05:49 · answer #8 · answered by m j 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
keep a list of things he did with her that she enjoyed, go through the list, make sure you've done those things, to show her than you can be a better boyfriend, then aside from this list, try to do new things, show her new things, travel with her, take road trips and such, show her the other side of life (how happy she can be with you)
hope this helps :)
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2006-09-15 17:04:41 · answer #9 · answered by absoluteao 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If she still thinks about her ex,than i'm sorry,I hate to say this,But you need to find someone else.You deserve to be with someone who loves you,and only you.Anyways good luck!
2006-09-15 17:08:16 · answer #10 · answered by smallish baby budge 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋