my dad only cares about other people..
i just entered high school i wanted to join the tennis team but the caoch isnt there in lunch times...before school and after school...but he wanst there..then i wrote a note to his mail but he didnt answer back...it went on for a week
when i came home dad said"its your fault for not being on the team !your so lazy that you cant do anything!!!"he said that even thought i didnt say anything..
i am haveing a hard time..in earth science i had a test all week...i had to do spanish test...on top of that i walk to home that is 50 min away...
he yells at me beacuse this church people told dad i wasnt in this "club"
and i had reasonese....and he yelled at me and made me cry and he started to nag at me all over again..
he only thinks about what other people say..
if i cry he cant just understand that my feelings are hurt he just assumes im cring beacuse his nagging..
im starting to think his being unreasonable and a jackass!
2006-09-15 14:32:48 · 18 answers · asked by Grack 5 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
didnt i say he was unreasonable?
i CANT talk to him even thought i want too
2006-09-15 14:36:55 · update #1
sorry but he does sound kinda mean. just tell him that you understand where hes coming from and that he only wants the best for you but he has to ease up a bit.
i mmean, u are in high school and high school is really tough. Maybe you'll join a different team, where the coach is actually available when u need him/her. Good Luck!
2006-09-15 14:37:33 · answer #1 · answered by sandee 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Ask him what it was like when he was your age. I'll bet he wishes he was alot more active in high school and wants you to take full advantage of it. What's sad is your in high school and he only has a couple years left to bond with you before you are out in the world. He should be enjoying the time he has with you and encouraging you to be the best you that you can be.
If your mom isn't assisting you maybe you can ask your pastor about this and possibly have the pastor meet your dad and you.
I really hope your dad doesn't throw this time away...it goes very quickly. Life is too short to care about what other people think about you and he needs to learn than. Good luck sweetie
2006-09-15 15:07:54 · answer #2 · answered by elong 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Hello, It sounds like you father is not a happy man. At your age you should be getting guidance not so much criticism.Maybe write him a letter and ask him how he felt at your age.Tell him you love him and need his help.If you cant get what you want from him, use your school for help, so you do not feel so alone.I am a former teacher and the guidance department is a really good start.Maybe a close friend will listen too they might be going through the same type of problem.We all need someone to talk to, at any age...Good Luck!
2006-09-15 15:07:11 · answer #3 · answered by *ELiZaH* 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I know what you are saying...being in a Korean family...it's all bout what someone else thinks....just tell him you don't like it. be done...do something else you want to do.But tell him you don't like it...telling him the tennis coach is only there before or after school, any logical person would think you can go early...or stay late....so it is your fault...logically speaking...Koreans do care what other people say..it is a shame...because for me.... I am the kind of person that asks...."what are you look'in at?" So to me I never understood why all the fronting to make your self look better. I had to say at one time...Those people don't pay my bills, they don't put food on my table...It is tough...Try being mixed race marring a Korean man.... You just gotta tell him...He should live for his family not everyone elses , ask him whats the importance in making everybody like you....Tell him these words..
2006-09-15 14:53:21 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you can't sit down and talk to him, why not try to write him a letter and just tell him how you feel? Tell him that you are writing the letter because you feel as if you can not talk to him. Maybe it will help. He can't yell back at you if he is reading the letter, and even if he yells at you after he's read it, at least you know that he read what you had to say and was unable to interrupt you.
2006-09-15 14:42:49 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
have you tried to talk to him about it? he does seem pretty unsympathetic towards you, by what you've said...
i have a friend who's going through something similar to what you are. i don't really know what to say to either of you because you're both kinda stuck with your dads until you turn 18... i hope that things get better for you. until then, i'll continue to pray for you. let me know if you ever need to talk, okay?
oh, and if you don't want people's advice... maybe you shouldn't ask for it.
2006-09-15 14:38:00 · answer #6 · answered by jenn w 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
A lot of times I have problems with my dad to SInce you didn't metion your mom, I'm guesing she isn't around. Try praying, or go to your school's guidance counsler. You should not have to live that way. Don't call him a jackass though.
2006-09-15 14:35:58 · answer #7 · answered by away.laughing.on.a.fast.camel 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
When i was younger and had problems with my dad I asked my mom to talk to him. But if you cant have a mom or grandparent talk to him for you then write a letter and make sure that your letter is detailed. Tell him exactly how he makes you feel and ask him to talk to you instead of yelling at you.
2006-09-15 14:38:29 · answer #8 · answered by sweethonesty1699 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you are stressing out and that's fine, let it out or will fester. you did what you could and if even your dad doesn't believe you atleast YOU know you tried. your dad just wants you to do something with yourself. he means no harm i'm sure.
2006-09-15 14:35:59 · answer #9 · answered by Eryc 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am a father. Both of my sons are now grown men. Your father is failing as a parent. Please believe me when I say that he is the problem, not you. I don't care what excuse anyone gives for his behavior. He is thinking of himself, NOT you! I hope you find help soon.
2006-09-15 14:47:50 · answer #10 · answered by Proud Liberal 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋