Is it cheating to make out with another girl?

Question

Okay, here's the deal. No I did not make out with another girl. So, lets see if I can explain this... I love this girl, we went out for 29 months and 6 days. We broke up at the begining of summer after senior year (many reasons, including that we were going to college on opposite sides of the country...) Didn't talk for a month, then started hanging out again. I love her, she says she loves me... we acted more or less like we were going out all summer... I told her I'd be willing to try it again... we eventually decided to wait and see how life worked on opposite sides of the country... the other day, I was on the phone with her and she tells me she made out with another girl 5 or 6 days ago... my question is...

How should I take this? Yes, we're not going out officially, but if you forget titles, we are... or at least, thats the impression I got... assuming we were going out, would this be cheating? Should I care? most importantly... would you? girls and guys opinions both welcome...

Okay... to clarify things... I have no interest in a 3-some, for those of you who hinted at such...

We aren't officially going out. We're kind of in a wait and see mode. I'm flying out to Portland to go visit her in a little less than a month... we might resolve some of the uncertainty then...

She was NOT drunk at the time (at least, she said she wasn't). She feels that it doesn't mean anything because it's with another girl, and while she isn't bi, its something that is apparently fun sometimes. Not sure where the distinction between being bi and it being fun sometimes lies...

Answer 1

ask her what prompter her to do that and what that means in relation to you. the best way to work this out would be to talk to her. communication is the key. also, you have to evaluate your own feelings and what your opinion is of her now that you know what she does. if it was just a drunk, spur of the moment, one time thing, you should probably forget about it, but it that's something she does often, she's either has strange habits or she's bisexual. either way, that doesn't work out too well for you.

Answer 2

Wow, that was something I didn't expect from the title.
If I were you, I'd be a little taken aback. Did she consider you guys to be together when she made out with this other girl? That's something you shoud ask her. If she did, then yes, it is cheating. If she didn't then no. It's rather complicated because you guys never had a sit down talk about being together... it just kind of happened. Maybe she did it because she thought you'd be into her kissing another girl. It's obvious you care about her so it's not like anyone can say 'Just don't care.'

If I were in your shoes, I'd care and I'd probably be pissed, even if the guy/girl I was dating didn't consider us a couple at the time. I really hope you work things out. Good luck

Answer 3

It really depends on you. I personally think that it is cheating whether you are making out with a girl or guy, but on the other hand, my boyfriend has specifically said that he doesn't care if I make out with other girls. Especially if he can watch.

So yes, it's cheating in a sense, but you should carefully think about whether you care or not. Think of her kissing another girl... does it make you feel jealous? If it doesn't, I wouldn't worry about it. It's a bit different with girls, because they're a whole lot more touchy feely. I'm straight, but my friend (who's bi, and very hot) and I have been known to occasionally make out just because we're bored, or because we're both a bit... yeah... and there's no guys around. But we're not girlfriends, and we'll never be. It's just something we do for fun.

Although you should be considering whether a long distance relationship is a good idea. They almost never work out.

Answer 4

Really it all depends on how you feel if it is cheating or not... but really see why she did this, and did she considered you guys being offical before she went and kissed another girl, but personally if you guys were offical I would think of this as cheating, unless she had this great reason why in the world she would does that.

Answer 5

I would consider it cheating and I'd be majorly ticked off. It sounds like the relationship isn't that important to her. And I don't believe being drunk is any freaking excuse, either.

I think you and your girlfriend need to have a serious talk about where your relationship is headed.

Answer 6

In all honesty, i'm happy and suprised some ladies do in comparison to ladies. i don't understand why ALL ladies are not lesbians or a minimum of bisexual. i could not blame them. women persons are so attractive and sensual. They continually scent and flavor and sense and look and sound so solid! i may be a lesbian sl*t if I have been a girl! lol

Answer 7

Let me put it this way...The sin is in thoughts...So if she made out with another girl she was coscience of what she was doing to you and yet she done it...I think that u should leave this girl...I believe there are pretty girls in ur side of the countrey...

Answer 8

seems to me since you are in opposite countries you aren't officially together , your relationship will fall apart anyway. by being so far apart. you are not officially going out . its a difficult relationship..

Answer 9

cheating is cheating whether it is man and woman or woman and woman or man and man it is stilling cheating but if she loves you like she says she does then she wouldn't mess with anybody and it seems like the trust is wearing thin and the honesty is shot but only you can make this decision good luck

Answer 10

well for one thing long distance relationships never work, an cheating is cheating wether its a guy or girl