Why are people so rude? Jealousy?

Question

I am not sleazy and I am NOT looking for a man on here! I just wanted to know how people meet new love interests!As I am recently seperated from my high school sweetheart and husband of 6 years. As for my profession I am an LPN, and put myself threw school dancing, there is nothing wrong with a woman who is determined to pay for her own education.

Answer 1

I am sorry you are going through this, hon. Unfortunately people often fail to understand what truly motivates others to ask a specific question and more often than not presume that what someone is asking or responding to has negative connotations. You know and I know that our intentions are more often than not a simple query, but some simply don't get it and respond meanly. Unfortunately you can't teach others how to be evolved, sensitive and polite human beings. They have to come to that on their own volition,and some simply are ill equipped or incapable of doing that. My best advice to you honestly and as another woman, is to ignore them. You know what your intention was and that is what matters.

I recently was yelled at by a member here because I responded to a question they posed that stressed one element, but left out the basic reasons of why they were asking the question in the first place. In effect this person left out the pertinent reasons and facts for their question and nearly everyone wrote back a similar response to mine. In fact their responses were nasty and obnoxious, while mine was nice, polite, but pertinent and in direct response to the facts as they were presented. What did I get? A nasty, long email from them. I was lectured to about what their real issue was (as if I could have read their mind) and was told all sorts of mean things, especially that they didn't care about my opinion. Truthfully they did and I struck a nerve, which
obviously prompted them to defend themselves so vehemently. I wanted to respond and say, "Well, if you were clearer and gave ALL the facts, my response would have been completely different." But did I write back? No, because I would be giving them power they simply didn't deserve and frankly, I wasn't all that interested in them anyway. I found their reaction amusing in a sad sort of way because it wasn't my fault that they were unclear in the first place. I deleted the message and moved on. So move on, my friend. These people don't matter in the scheme of your life.

Again, as another woman (of 50) I commend you on putting yourself through nursing school, regardless of how you earned it. If you did so by dancing, being a waitress or a bartender or whatever, bravo to you! YOU MET YOUR GOAL. I work on a college campus and I know how difficult LPN programs are, but you did it and you must applaud yourself! I do. As for the naysayers, again, let them go. Ask yourself if they matter?

And finally, I have gone through a difficult marriage and divorce and I KNOW how hard it is to meet men out there. I dated a few guys and had some longish term relationships, but they had issues. I went on some awful blind dates arranged by friends that were so disastrous one guy literally made me want to vomit. He was a narcissist and so in love with himself (and painfully disturbed too, which was frightening since he ran a mental health facility) he made me ill. But there are happy endings...I joined an online dating club and within a month I met my second husband. We married 6 months after we met and will be celebrating our 6th wedding anniversary tomorrow....it can happen.

With every best wish to you in all aspects of your life...and remember, do what YOU need to do for yourself, and don't worry about what others think or say...they AREN'T YOU. This took me several thousand years to understand, but now, honey, I own who I am and carry on with my life the way I want to, even if others don't like it. It isn't my problem!! Don't make it yours.

Answer 2

I'm not sure how you connect your initial question and your description. I'd suggest that you wait to find a new love interest until you are divorced. Even though you are separated, you are still a married woman. I don't know what you mean when you say you put yourself through school dancing (what kind of dancing), but it is commendable that you worked hard, went to school and became an LPN. Give yourself some time to work through whatever feelings you're having over the end of your marriage. Take some time to take stock of your life before you get involved in another relationship. When the time is right, check out www.eharmony.com. God bless!

Answer 3

well you right nothing wrong there but your issues with others op ion will keep you alone longer . just stop worrying about others and be yourself and do your own thing and be true to your heart and how you get there is your business . men are everywhere looking for your type and other types . depends on what your looking for in a man . bars are not great for lasting relationships but they are great for man of the week or month . try doing volunteer work and look for loving guys who do same if your looking for your next dream guy that will grow old with you . but first of all don't try so hard your not bad looking here and these guys are surely seeing this just pay more attention and you ll find one sneaking a glance then move in and start talking . no matter what happens be proud of yourself and hold your head up and good luck .

Answer 4

In my opinion people are very rude today basically for two main reasons. Lack of proper home training(their parents were rude and/or did not take the time to teach them proper respect) and/or they are scared and believe they have to act tough. The "haters" think its fashionable to put people down and tell them off. They for some reason ( though I don't know why) feel the rudeness give them superiority and power when actually its the opposite.
This is not to imply that I feel that I am perfect but I would like to share my personal quote that I try to live by daily. "Whenever things are not going your way, use it as an opportunity to show how much class you have".

Answer 5

Just be patient and wait. As a nurse, you meet lots of people. When I was out there dating I always thought of the dates as going out with "friends==never potential mates". Like I never really tried to impress them. Then God put the right man in my life. I've been dating a wonderful guy now for over two years. Good luck!

Answer 6

I think it's great that you put yourself through school! You also chose very good profession!

As for meeting new love interests, you could sign up for a dating service online( e-harmony is supposed to be a good one!) or in your neighborhood, Join a church or organization, ask friends to set you up with someone.

Have patience and a sense of humour. It wont happen overnight! I was separated for two and divorced for three[years] before I met the man I am engaged to.

Answer 7

Most people meet at the work place or something that has to do with the work place.
Some other places that relate to where friends hang out or friends of friends hang out.
Another is at a church fellowship or unmarried groups.

Answer 8

There are a lot of people on here that just type in nasty crap to make themselves feel better about their own sh!tty lives. I don't think it's so much jealousy, just petty people with too much time on their hands. Don't take it to heart, you'll find someone soon enough, although I doubt it'll be on answers.

Answer 9

it is beyond the human race to be truly compassionate and kind. i think we lost that gene back in the day. anyways. it's great that you are a nurse. ummm....meeting new people that you like, you should go to a place that you love. you can find people there that love doing the same stuff. like........a library if you are a reader..............a dance club if you like that type of guy. and so on.

Answer 10

You hit the nail on the head: Jealousy. Some people don't take well to others, such as yourself, doing what it takes to better themselves. Hold your head up and be proud of who you are. If people don't like it or get jealous, to hell with them. Best wishes!