Can Kindness Really Influence A Bad Person?

Question

I used to cook homemade meals (with generous portions), and wash and iron his clothes at no cost, and was very kind to him.

He never said: "thank you or I appreciate it. And he treated me very meanly, and gave me very hateful looks.

My questions is do you think by being kind and Christain-like to him was fruitless? I don't expect recognition or anything but I never expected bad hateful behavior from this person.

You all have such beautiful answers.

No. I wouldn't give up being kind, it's just sad if he was hurting and mean. That's why I tried to be extra nice. Oh Well.

Immapam,
Didn't expect nothing but respect in return, that's all.

By hateful looks he gave me, I used to take care of his mother, and he was mean to his mom, and stealing her $$$, and the mother always told me that I was good to her like a daughter.

Don,
Thanks for the input. It made me see that I was being critical. THanks.

Dorcas,
Thanks.
I left because he yelled profanity at me, and threatened me because I was not being paid by an agency and he had nothing to do with the agency or anything as His mother was paying the agency.

Answer 1

Yes, it was fruitless. I believe that some of the behavior people exhibit is in their genes. People can change but some people are set on being hateful. Some kind of evolutionary mechanism for defense.

Answer 2

I believe it was very important that you showed him your love and kindness. It takes courage to help others some times, especially when they are not living from their true spirit. I believe that it is wrong not to try to reach people with kindness and a loving heart.

I am sorry to hear that you were treated meanly. There must have been something about the combination or living arrangement that did not work.

What you did was not fruitless, I am sure that your gestures will be remembered. At the time did you do the chores with love? If you did, you would not need any recognition.

It sounds as though the person had a bunch of problems, else why would he be hateful towards you?

Have you stopped communication with the person now? Is it because you were not given the recognition that you wanted?

It may be that the person needs your spiritual help. I would say that you should not give up on them.

Answer 3

I'm not sure what a "hateful look" is. I am reminded that in my childhood, my oldest sister was very difficult in the mornings, especially when she was a teenager. I hid behind a cereal box so I didn't have to look at her.
Years later I found out, she had sleep apnea, and the lack of sleep made her an unfit human being. She was not being evil.

In relationship situations, the other person may not be getting expressions of gratitude for what he or she contributes either.

Answer 4

Absolutely. My mother has been visiting and diseased man at a nursing home for several years. He cannot move his legs, which are atrophied and locked in place. He can barely move his arms. He is just about as old as she, but his condition has taken almost all his life away. He was very bitter and angry, mean to the nursing home staff and my mother. He was an atheist and said contemptuous things about religion.

She continued to go. She would feed him because he can't feed himself. She would talk to him and tell stories. She would also talk about faith and the Bible. Over the last few years, he has softened and begun to treat people quite respectfully. As my mother would read the Bible to him, he would start memorizing passages. Now he has memorized almost whole books, with my mother's help of reading out loud ( as he cannot hold a book).

He has not mentioned atheism, nor has he spoken of being a Christian. But he has become quite kind and conversational with other. Very interesting transition.

Answer 5

Kindness never goes un-noticed or unreturned. That is if it was truly kindness out of compassion and care for your fellow man regardless of their human condition. I suspect that even though you believe that your actions were genuine, that by your question alone you were expecting some reciprocal action from it. There is I might here, point out a difference in being Christian-like and Christ-like. Christians have become all consumed by their own religious state of mind rather that the mind set of Christ. It's something to examine in ones own life.

Answer 6

True kindness has no expectations. However, if this was someone you had a relationship with, the situation is a little different. Commitments require give and take. I don't think you should give up on kindness because of the reaction of one person. We're hardly all alike.

Answer 7

i do no longer see that outfits. I see a staggering, proficient, humorous guy. i admire ya basically the variety you're, ((((((((((Jack)))))))))). No faith, no illness can substitute that. And, to be user-friendly, i do no longer provide a rat's asss what any faith has to assert approximately HIV - or homosexuality. So, i'm no longer able to truly say how this is been inspired with the help of it. standard, faith maintains to be standard in an afternoon and age whilst humanity must be previous such archaic thinking because of the fact human beings like to have an excuse to choose others - a minimum of, this is appropriate to the Abrahamic religions. And, I say "screw 'em".

Answer 8

Kindness can influence SOME bad persons... but not all.

Be kind to others, but do not permit yourself to be taken for granted (that is the doorway to co-dependency).

If you are in a relationship with such a person, lay down clear expectations of how you expected to be treated (including please, thank you, kind treatment, courtesy etc), and if he does not come through, terminate the relationship. Seemingly harsh advice, but the kindest advice I can think of, for the long term.

Cordially,
John

Answer 9

There is no such thing as fruitless kindness. We may not reap rewards from the one our kindness was shown to but it surely does come back to us...usually when we need it most and expect it least.

Blessings )O(

Answer 10

God bless you for your kindness!! It is never fruitless by acting Christian you did right! Maybe a change will made in his heart that you will never know about because you opened a door of kindness to this man.God works in mysterious ways.