But,she doesn't understand that no matter who i tell or what i say i just don't like HER as a person,yet i'm forced to love the mother side of her...i'm 13 so ppl are all just like.."pffft it's part of ur teen years" but i am wise beyond my years just haven't developed emotionally...also they think it's b/c my dad died when i was 2 but i know that has nothing to do with it!! i think what's really wrong is that no one really takes the time to listen....they only do when they're done yelling and by that time i'm in tears and can't move while having a mental breakdown.....idk if i should take counseling or not...
2006-09-15
11:42:59
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17 answers
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asked by
Kiki Raver
2
in
Health
➔ Mental Health
well i can hang out with my mom but it just seems she always wants to fight...even my 17 year old brother tries to avoid her as much as possible...maybe we can get her couseling but we're poor
2006-09-15
11:49:03 ·
update #1
....i like to mess with ppls minds....think i can go just for that?
2006-09-15
12:04:20 ·
update #2
ok u guys obviously don't get it.....my mom can just be sitting there....i walk in...poor myself a cup of tea and she just starts argueing with me...it's not that i yell back or anything.....i actually hardly ever say anything...it's me that needs to vent,but i just can't when every time i go to say something i start crying b/c i don't want to hurt her feelings,b/c i know i can't hurt that mom part of her,and yes i've wondered what it'd be like to be HER but also...i wonder what it would be like for her if she was ME,i never asked to be here,you guys are all saying u've been through it but u haven't...i am NOT just being a teen,i've had these feelings all my life,wondering why am i here when i just don't want to be,i love my brother more than anyone in the world and he's what's keeping me here,and my mom does start to get abusive only recently have i fought back and hit her,it knocked a little sense into her and we've had less fights now but i don't want to have to beat her to talk
2006-09-15
12:54:34 ·
update #3
Hmmm. Doesn't sound like a good situation from here. Try looking at it this way. Perhaps in counseling you can learn techniques to deal with the turds in your life. (Get the hint?)
2006-09-15 11:49:26
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answer #1
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answered by DelK 7
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No, I don't think you need counseling. You said it yourself when you said no one takes the time to listen. You are young and if you are truly wise beyond your years, you will know that the method of communication is most important is you want to be heard. Try not to turn to tears. 13 year olds tend to be overly dramatic at times. People will continue to say this because it is the truth and don't be offended when people say this to you. While you believe that you are wise beyond your years, you are not. You have a lot to learn and when you gain some years like maybe when you get into your twenties, you will look back and laugh at yourself and wonder how your mother ever put up with you. Calm yourself down. You're too young to be venting so much. You think this is bad, wait until you're out taking on the entire world.
2006-09-15 11:52:49
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answer #2
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answered by Call Me Babs 5
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i'm no longer a guy, yet have a grown son who went via a great deal as a teenager and youthful grownup... there have been cases, sensible, affected person and prepared to hearken to as i substitute into? He mandatory the suggestion of an purpose, non-relative affiliated individual to steer him, and so I reported some counseling and guess what? In some classes? He understood issues better, had an more advantageous carry close on actuality, understood I wasn't as "biased" as he would have theory, however I enjoyed him/love him dearly... now and back honey, inquiring for help from an intruder is the VERY ingredient we choose. Why? by using fact they don't be conscious persons, yet can garner objectivity in coping with the project(s) to hand. education is a significant area of living existence...we don't continually get it the place we expect or choose it? yet someway? It enriches our lives and we make the main of it. i do no longer pretend to appreciate why, I in basic terms be attentive to? it works. Grace
2016-10-01 00:11:44
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answer #3
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answered by mauzon 4
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Go to counseling. It will not make you like her but it will help you cope with HER. She's obviously overwhelmed and you AND your brother don't appreciate that she's trying to provide for you both... it ain't easy. Cut her some slack. Instead of talking back, keep quiet and let her run her mouth. She NEEDS to vent. You're not a little emotional emotional girl; you're man enough and strong enough to let that go by you. Be a little more mature and let her have her emotional tantrums. What does it matter to you that she says and yells? Let her. Keep your cool.
Listen, most of us have gone through that. I promise you, in a few years, you will think way different. For now, go to counseling and learn to deal with her. It will not make you like or dislike anyone. Play along and find ways of being a better person. Go to counseling and you'll see for yourself that no one is going to force you to do anything but you can learn to deal with her. OK?
Good luck and best wishes.
2006-09-15 12:33:26
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answer #4
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answered by Anonymous
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Unless your mom is abusive in some way, it sounds like the typical teenage years to me. Most teenagers, not all, think their parents are annoying, odd, or uninteresting. Also, if therapy is chosen, it should be for the entire family, not just one of you. You would all meet individually with a counselor, and then together once a week or more.
Again, unless your mom is abusive or cruel, I would try to be more open to communication with her. What if the tables were turned, and your mom didn't like you???? Wouldn't that hurt? What if you had to feed, clothe, or care for someone who told you they didn't like you, or treated you like a burden. Wouldn't that piss you off?
Think about how things COULD be, and maybe, just maybe, you'll find a gentler and more loving way to address this problem. The fact that you're here asking for help, shows that you do love you mom, and would like to work things out. Good luck!
2006-09-15 12:03:15
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answer #5
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answered by Anonymous
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i really believe counseling could help you become stronger so you don't have mental breakdowns anymore. And they can give you some great tools for dealing with your mom when things get tough. Counseling is really the one place a person will listen to you and not judge you, only try to help you. Its what they get paid for. And if you do go into counseling and tell them how your mom treats you, they will occasionally bring her in for a private session and talk to her about what she needs to work on as a mom. It really sounds like family counseling would be a good thing to. goodluck!
2006-09-15 11:57:29
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answer #6
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answered by bobbie21brady 5
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You just did, LOL, Yahoo Answers could be used as counseling!! I had problems with parents at your age about 3 years ago. I think the only way to look at this is NOT compare to other teens and say "oh, it's regular in teen ages", but look at what's "right" and what's "wrong". Parents might not be wise/right all the times, but their your parents, without them, where would you be?
If you had a son/daughter, you probably will do things that they don't agree/like.
Humans are animals, parent will ALWAYS protect their kids and kids should in return protect and love their parents.
2006-09-15 11:51:09
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answer #7
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answered by Anonymous
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Go to counseling. It will help you learn good tools to deal with your mother better. Even if you never end up liking her, you still have to deal with her for a long time, she is your mother. I know the counselor we are seeing has done a lot for us. "His" son has always hated his dad for lots of reasons that don't make sense to anyone but him. But through counseling they are really getting along great and starting to hang out and do fun things together. That doesn't mean he "likes" him now, but just that he's learning how to live with him and have peace about it. Give it a try!
2006-09-15 11:46:52
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answer #8
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answered by wellbeing 5
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Maybe both of you need counseling. If you go to counseling there is someone that has to hear what you want to say because you are paying them to. You could just go for a little while and see if it helps and if not then you can stop. But if they try and put you on some kind of drug don't do it.
2006-09-15 11:53:57
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answer #9
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answered by lex83201 3
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It is not required by law or any force of nature that you have to LIKE your Mother. You should try however to try to love her as your Mother. She is your Mother after all!
You should be kind to her and try to help her. Just try to be patient and try to understand where she is coming from.
I grew not to like my Mother but I did try to help her and show her love. I still don't completely like her but I am glad I took the time and patience to give her some love and compassion as a fellow human being.
I lost her about a month ago. Be kind to your Mom while you still have her.
Just by trying to understand her it may quiet your own mind and it may help you not to have such a hard time emotionally dealing with her.
Also if you can, even if you don't mean it, pray for her. Say a prayer for her every day even if it's that her shoes don't wear out as fast and you too will start to heal. I can't explain why that works but it just does.
2006-09-15 11:54:55
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answer #10
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answered by miso1cat 5
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