me and my ex were together for 3 yrs and have been seperated for 2..we have experienced so much from abuse to me feeling worthless. i feel that this relationship is bring me down but for some reason i cant walk away. he's constanley disappointing me: perfect example we were suppose to go out tonight but he claims he isnt feeling well, he gives me an excuse every f u c king weekend. when this happens i start to cry, i feel hopeless, and unloved. i even think about committing suicide..someone please help because i'm a time bomb ticking
2006-09-15 10:23:57 · 28 answers · asked by Ultimate Diva 2 in Health ➔ Mental Health
LISTEN..IF YOUR GOING TO JUDGE ME BY MY F U C KING SCREEN NAME DONT EVEN REPLY!! KEEP UR NEGATIVE COMMENTS AWAY
2006-09-15 10:31:27 · update #1
It's your fault that the behavior continues. You have the power to walk away, so why don't you? Do you just like the drama of it all? Or are you a relationship masochist?
Ultimate Diva Huh??? With a name like that I rest my case.
2006-09-15 10:25:11 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 3⤋
Let it all out. Take a individual day to simply stay in bed and cry and watch tv and are available to terms with what has occurred. It's very problematic to handle quitting smoking and losing anyone you could have loved dearly, but it can get less difficult. If the relationship ended like that then it just wasn't meant to be. Everything occurs for a rationale. Quitting smoking has already made you a more fit man or woman. Seem at it that way. If your melancholy deepens i'm going see a therapist. There's nothing mistaken with that. Consider higher.
2016-08-09 14:29:20 · answer #2 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Let all of it out. Take a private day to simply keep in mattress and cry and watch TV and are available to phrases with what has occurred. It's very complicated to manage quitting smoking and wasting any one you've got adored dearly, however it's going to get simpler. If the connection ended like that then it simply wasn't intended to be. Everything occurs for a intent. Quitting smoking has already made you a more healthy individual. Look at it that manner. If your despair deepens I move see a therapist. There is not anything flawed with that. Feel higher.
2016-08-21 07:37:05 · answer #3 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
hi, I really think you should give yourself a break and try to see the positive aspects both in being with him and in being without him. so, no matter what you choose in the future, you will at least have something good to hold onto...
thing is, if you already have a tendency for depression, you probably have a melancholic temper and you need a partner who can balance your tendencies, rather then make them worse. it appears like your current partner can't do that. but again, let's face it, 99% of the men in this world can't do that. and by your attitude of constantly being disappointed by him you actually encourage him to go on letting you down. you could try to change your attitude a bit (even if it feels unnatural at first) and see if that works. for instance, if you're staying home tonight use the occasion to give him a massage or foot rub, and ask him to do the same for you. if he says no, arm yourself with patience and try to find out what are the reasons of his refusal. it will not be easy, but once you get him to give up his defensive attitude (because making up excuses is defensive, from head to toes), you might find out what is really wrong.
however, do not expect miracles. living in a couple is probably the hardest thing people ever had to do. so take your time and give him time too and see what's connecting you and what's bringing you apart...
most important thing of all: no matter how attached you feel to this guy, always keep in mind that you are the only one who can solve out your depression issues. sure, having his support would be nice, but always turn to yourself for the most reliable source of strength. and next time you feel hopeless and unloved, take a paper and a pencil and try to write down the reasons why you feel like that. be true to yourself and don't blame him for issues that you are provoking yourself. but if you make that list each time you feel depressed, and he truly appears as the cause of your depression, it's obvious he is doing you more harm than good, so start walking away. not necessarily in the physical way, but more in an emotional way. find new activities that you can do without him and learn to enjoy them without him. or take up some sport. or art classes. or anything. just make sure you are investing your time and energy in something positive for yourself. after all, you are the most important person in your world!
best of luck.
2006-09-15 10:50:42 · answer #4 · answered by by_request2000 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Are you insane? He isn't worth wanting do die for! If you are not even together, (cause you say you have been separated for a while), then why on Earth are you wasting time on this guy?!? Do you value yourself at all?!? You can find someone much better than that.
Stop acting like he is the only man on this planet cause he isn't! Depression is all in your head cause you have been letting him and probably others bring you down. You can do better than that! You need a man who will uplift you. However, in order to be happy, what you need to do is make YOURSELF happy.
Only you can make yourself happy. Do not depend on anyone to make you happy. Get active and live a little. Life is too short to waste on losers and feeling sorry for yourself. Take care and good luck!
2006-09-15 10:46:19 · answer #5 · answered by no1charmerlondon 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You suffer typical symptoms of codependence. Your feelings are not about this dude. They're about you - Make a list of what's so awesome about this guy and next to it make a list of what's awful about him. Compare - you'll see that it makes NO sense to continue to see someone like that. Something inside you chose that. We teach people how to treat us. Seek counseling ASAP!!! Seriously, we weren't placed in this world to live miserably. There is an answer in a higher power. And counselors are here to help us in just these situations. You deserve to learn to be happy!! Go for it. You don't have to walk away from this dude - seek counseling without telling him, and take one day at a time. Before long you'll wonder what in the world you ever wanted in the jerk in the first place. Take care!
2006-09-15 10:31:11 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe you want a relationship but you don't really want this one and you are having trouble finding another one. You can't be happy in or out of this relationship. You are stuck.
The answer is to go to a therapist who is skilled at treating depression. You can get a reference from the professor who teaches the mood disorders class at your local university. You should certainly be on medication and address these issues. Life has its ups and downs and it is time for you to start having a few ups.
2006-09-15 10:34:13 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sweetheart don't let a relationship do that to you..Listen I know it's hard to walk away I 've been there..YOU CAN DO THIS for yourself..Please the thought's of suicide out of your head believe me NO guy is worth that..I thought I would never find the right guy for me But I did and trust me there is one out ther for YOU..Please get out of this relationship and you will see just how strong you are..Give yourself some credit here you are stronger than you think..GO ..you ARE NOT HOPELESS you are a girl who is in a bad relationship and needs to get out and find herself..Trust me sweety you can do this , walk away and give yourself a gift of self control..I am beside you all the way because I know you can do it..Have a HAPPY life..You deserve it..
2006-09-15 10:39:03 · answer #8 · answered by Just Dreamin' 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My dear, you have got to get yourself into therapy ASAP. I know from first hand how depression can hurt any kind of a relationship. The very first thing you have to do is start loving yourself. If you cant do that there is no way for you to love someone else. Maybe this man isnt right for you in the first place, have you ever thought of that?????
I am being honest with you and if I have hurt your feelings that in NO way was my intention!!! Please for your sake and no one elses, see a doctor, therapist, or psychiatrist and get yourself on the right track.
2006-09-15 10:29:00 · answer #9 · answered by shirley e 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
this relationship is obviously unhealthy. not to sound rude or judgemental, but it does take 2 to make a relationship fail. even though i don't know you, i know that you have many great qualities and you should be able to find a man that you can have a wonderful, healthy, supportive relationship with.
don't do anything drastic. drop the loser that makes you feel bad. look inside yourself to see what you can do to avoid the same problems when you enter your next relationship. look at your good points and play them up! you have let this guy tear down your self-esteem and self-worth. you don't deserve to feel this way and this dude does not deserve YOU!
2006-09-15 10:42:21 · answer #10 · answered by irish_3078 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Obviously he doesn't care. If you split up, it will hurt for a while, but, just keep thinking of how good your going to feel once the hurt is gone. Suicide is a not an option escspecially if your doing to hurt him. Praying is the best answer.
2006-09-15 10:29:00 · answer #11 · answered by Johnny 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋