Because we hear all about murders and crap that go around here nowadays. Take that one guy on TV, for example, who killed his wife and unborn son and buried them and now is on death row?
How far can you go to trust your husband/wife/lover about things like that? It kinda creeps me out. What do you guys think?
No crappy answers please.
2006-09-15 09:17:41 · 33 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
no
no
2 years maybe
2006-09-15 09:19:54 · answer #1 · answered by cars_o_holic 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think that 2 weeks or 2 months is way to short of a dating period before marriage.
Even if you have been friends for several years, you don't know them as well as you think. You don't know all of their habits, quirks, likes, dislikes.... You can't build a trusting relationship in that short of a time frame.
Besides the scary part of not knowing who you are marrying, there is also the practical aspect. What about past relationships, any kids, family problems, financial stability, etc... How about what you want for the future and how you will handle things in the years to come. There just isn't enough time to talk about all of that in just a couple of months.
You also have no way of knowing how compatible you are until you've had at least one good fight. You have to know that you can work past disagreements, find compromises, and be respectful of the others point of view. Not to mention how the other person handles stress and anger. Do they get violent, do they drink, do they react badly, or do they handle it well, etc...
I think that people should date for at least 6 months before they get engaged, but a year is better. I also think that it's a good idea to live together for a few months or more before the wedding. You can learn more about the person in one day living with them that you can in a whole month of dating.
2006-09-15 09:30:01 · answer #2 · answered by welches_grape_jelly 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well whats the rush? Surely you can wait longer than that.
You marry a guy when you fully trust him, however long that takes or however fast it happens. You should feel like you know him inside out, you should have no doubts at all that he wouls be like one of those people.
So in your case, I'm sorry to say 2 weeks, even 2 months isn't enough, because you don't trust him, you can't even think of him as a friend or a boyfriend, you're definitely not close enough to get married.
When you get married you should know the person so well that even they don't know themselves the way you do.
If you suspect him now then you're not ready, after all, you don't suspect your parents in that same way do you?
2006-09-15 09:25:16 · answer #3 · answered by lakmii 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well you can never know a person i was with a guy since i was 9 years old and we marry when i was 18 we were marry for 21 + years and he had things hidden in the closet that i didn't know i met a guy on-line 12/28/03 we move in together on 12/29/04 got marry on 03/02/04 and we are very happy if you feel in your heart then go for it i only wish i had met this man years ago he is the best thing that has ever happen to me you half to follow your heart i do believe in love at first sight my kids love him we all have our move swings and we gonna have ups and down but ha you can always make it right with each other and another thing how do he feel about you it took me going though a rough marriage to fine happiness, good luck and god bless.
2006-09-15 09:36:59 · answer #4 · answered by teressis_freeman 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My grandmother always said that you should date a man for all 4 seasons before marrying him. I think that if you know you want to marry him, why not wait? Plan a great wedding and get to know each other in the process. Married or unmarried, you can still leave the person just as easily now adays, so why not take the time and be sure about the person you "love". If they love you that much too, then it's worth the wait.
2006-09-15 09:22:49 · answer #5 · answered by veeyababy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, it's not safe.
When marrying someone, you should take all the time possible before that to get to know them on a much higher level then a two week-two month level.
I don't believe anyone should marry (unless they were friends before dating) unless they've been together for at least a year.
It seems people that marry so quickly and in such a rush are the ones that end up in divorce and getting annulments.
2006-09-15 12:18:57 · answer #6 · answered by ♪Msz. Nena♫ 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, I really feel you need to get to know someone first. TWo months is way too little. I think you should be together at least a year before you get married. As far as the trust issue goes, you just need to go with what you feel is right. You should trust your instincts. You need to live together before you can make a life changing decision. And I think what people need to realize, is that Marriage is FOREVER. I hate all these people playing games like its a joke. Marraige is between two people that are in love and feel that they are meant for eachother.
2006-09-15 09:24:06 · answer #7 · answered by dnelak 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Yeah, in general, anyone who DOES get married in that short of a time span has NO real thought process going on in that little head of theirs. "Oh, but it's love at first sight!" Screw that! With the divorce rate at 52%, who really wants to get married now-a-days anyway? I'm saying that the only reason to get married is for insurance benefits, but otherwise ... live together and be happy.
Oh, and if you are thinking of getting married after 2 years, live with the person for at least a year and half ... that way the "honeymoon" stage is done and over with by the time the papers are signed and you definately KNOW what you are getting yourself into....
2006-09-15 09:29:33 · answer #8 · answered by fozbend11 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I really don't think you need to get married after only two weeks of dating. However, two months is more of a possibility. But the divorce rate in the U.S.A. is like 70% for all of those who get married before they know that they are really serious. Just think about that a little bit more and consider atleast four months of dating.
Hope that helps.
2006-09-15 09:22:53 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Best advice I ever heard on how long to wait before you marry someone was 5 seasons. Need to see how they live through each season before u know if u can be with them or not. The first season is too soon, so both of you will still be on your best behavior. That's why u wait 5 seasons, such as Fall, Winter, Spring, Summer, then Fall again. If you can make it through once, then you should be able to do it again.
2006-09-15 09:22:16 · answer #10 · answered by R G M 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I married my husband after just 6 months. Miraculously, we are still together 5 years later, but I often think that I wish I would have dated him longer. I didn't give myself time to find out about all his hidden quirks. Do yourself a favor, date him a MINIMUM of a year before considering marriage!
2006-09-15 09:23:40 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋