This is REALLY long, but I would really really, greatly appreciate an honest answer, thanks!?

Question

This girl and me were really close, we would stay up till 12 in the mornin talkin sometime, now that mite not be alot, but it is for her, she is homeschooled, I go to public school. Well I asked her to the movies, and she said Idk maybe , and REALLy backed off, she seemed nervous around me, I thought she just didnt wanna hurt my feelings, but she told her friends, she just wants to see if I can stick with her. Well we got further and further apart, until I couldnt stand it anymore and I emailed her, spilled my guts, and asked her to be brutally honest on how she fealt about me, heres what she said

well first of all, I don't hate you. second, I haven't been avoiding you either becuase its not been just swimming that I've been busy with its been life.I also haven't been beating around the bush because you never asked me if I did or not. But I haven't ever thought of being more than friends with you because we've always been good friends and I think thats how things should stay.I just don't want to ruin a friendship.hope you've had a good day, and i will talk to you later

Now, When I read that two things come to mind. One, that she is just trying to be nice. But on the other hand, she is just scared, because she has never had a bf b4, and weve been friends since age 7.

But now she seems more comfortable around me, like now she talks more, and seems more comfortable, but then she'll seem like she wants me, I can tell by the way she looks, and the way she acts, she just seems really sad, and down,

Oh yeah, and she told her mom , that she is just really really scared, and that she does like me, but she told her friends she just dont want to hurt my feelings, now her and her mom are really close, but so are her and her friends, Do you think she likes me, or is just letting me down easy?

And I am respecting her wishes, I emailed her and told her that I respect her decision, and we havent talked about it since.

But I really really do care for her, I wake up and she's the first thing I think about, I go to sleep and Fall asleep thinking about her. I mean I know I'm only 15, but I really do love her, and would do anything in this world to be with her. I've tried moving on, I've been trying to do that, but I just can't. Even though I am am guy, yes I have cried numerous time for her, and about her. I mean, I'm not ugly, I'm fit, and I'm not a big geek or anything, so what gives? I really do love her, what should I do?

Answer 1

tell her to stop playing games...i hate people that plays games...or just move on...

Answer 2

This is going to sound so cliche, but here I go anyway.

It's tough being a teenager. Those were the roughest years of many people's lives (including my own). You're on the edge of growing up, and you have desires for a first love. She's likely going through the roughest part of her life as well, and not sure how she feels about things. Teenage horomones start surging at your age and they don't help out anything when you're trying to think things through. Horomones are there to instagate action, and our brains are there to keep things in control. To make things worse, your horomone levels won't stabilize for awhile.

You have a lot of time ahead of you to make rational decisions, and to sssslllloooooowwwwwlllllyyyyyy develope a nice relationship with this young lady. You've already told her how you feel, so now the ball is in her court. If you back off, and show her that you're not going to be pushy about an answer, she might eventually decide that's what she wants. On the other hand, if you push her for an answer, even if it's once a month, she's more likely to back away for good.

Take a deep breath and feel good about yourself, you sound like a nice guy. Take it slow, and let things happen.

Taking it slow as a teenager has to be one of the toughest things to do. I hated taking things slow!

Good luck and a smile, you're a good guy.

Answer 3

Firstly I want to say I was in love with a guy in high school for 5 years I had a majour crush on him it was the same, he was the first thing that popped into my head and the last at night, i still think about him sometimes. And you know what? it was a total waste of time believe me you must get over this girl asap. She is only using you, she is letting you down easy.She knows how you feel about her that is why she was so nervous around you, she told you how she feels and that is only because she wants to be friend and nothing more because you will always be there if another boyfriend broke up with her.You would be the rebound boy untill she gets over the other boy.

You will always be her best friend and nothing more.Believe me you are wasting your tears for her. I found true love and believe me it is nothing like you feel now it is better much much better.
I know it is hard but try to move on dont talk to her so much anymore like you used too.Believe me you are waisting your time with her.Believe me it is realy convinient to have a boy friend to talk to about your real boyfriend. Good Luck.

Answer 4

Hi, I understand how you feel. It seems like you feel like she was giving you mixed messages. I think that she may have been more honest with you than you want to believe.

She probably really just thinks of you as a friend and was taken back by your inviting her on a date.She may look at you more like a brother than a boyfriend.

That's not neccessarily a bad thing. It may just take her longer to decide how she feels about you. She is probably sad because now she's sort of lost a friend. If you like her and she just liked having some one to trust and talk to you probably rocked her world quite a bit.

I would just suggest you back off... way off and try to recapture the friendship you had. That's what was special. If the other part is meant to be it will come to surface later on when she has matured enough to entertain boyfriend thoughts.

I hope this helps...

Good LUCK!

Answer 5

Do exactly what you said you wanted - BE WITH HER! Spend time with her, talk with her, but dont push her into anything else, just let that part happen how/if it likes to. And be happy doing that. Feelings between two people have to work both ways, and maybe some day when she wants you, you may not want her.....it's crazy like that sometimes. The biggest part of relationships is knowing the person, spending time with them and just doing what makes you happy. You can love someone - no one can stop you, but if it's going to scare her if you tell her you love her, then she'll run away and you wont be able to be with her any longer. Give her time. Stay with her, be with her and enjoy just that for as long as you can! Good luck!

Answer 6

Serious advice dude... and you'll learn this as you get older.

She says she's scared of ruining the friendship. Women say that a lot. A lot of dealing with women is about knowing how to reassure them.

Tell her that you're interested in being more than friends, but you guys can take it slow. Maybe just go on a date once in a while... see eachother a little more serious. Not as boyfriend and girlfriend... just as two friends that miiiiiiiight be interested in a little more than that.

Let her take it slow and ease into it. You guys are both really young, and she seems like she's not ready to start dating seriously yet. So assure her that no matter what you'll still be friends, and this is just something to see if maybe you can be more than that too.

And if she agrees to that, be a gentleman about it. She sounds like she's really shy about the idea of a romantic connection with -anybody- not just you.

Answer 7

Sorry, my man. She is not interested, or at least not interested enough to make an effort, which is the same thing. She thinks of you as a friend and nothing more. For your own sake you need to deal with this and accept that you will not be anything more with her.

If you need some space and time to try to adjust your feelings be honest with her and then maybe you shouldn't see her for a time. You are young and it will hurt but if you give yourself some time hopefully you will meet another girl who will like you and want to have a true relationship. I've been there, its not easy but that's life.

Answer 8

Welcome to the world dude. Probably not a guy or girl on here that hasn't been where you are now.

You are only 15. Just relax and let it go. You have so many other things to enjoy at that age that don't need to be screwed up with the boy-girl relationship thing. You have plenty of time for that pain/joy, etc.

And really, the best thing you can do is to step back and be unavailable to her for a little while. She may discover feelings she didn't know she had.

Let's just hope she doesn't wait too long...cause another fine lady might just snag you during half-time.

Good luck dude.

Answer 9

She's been clear. Other sources -like friends and rumors- may be mroe true, but the only thing that matters right now is what she has told you, becuase that is what she wants you to hear.

She could be scared, or she could be telling the truth. Either way, at this point in her life, she isn't ready for a relationship with you.

Its hard, but try and enjoy being with her. Date other people and see what its like. Saty friends, and what will happen happens.

Answer 10

I think you should accept the fact that she wants to be your friend. I mean you've been friends since you were seven, chances are, she thinks of you as family.To know some one from such a young age its almost impossible to eventually find them attractive in "that way." You should just be grateful for what you guys do share and if it turns to anything else in the near future...congratulations. Dont expect her to change her mind. THE BEST OF THINGS COME WHEN YOU LEAST EXPECTED!!!

Answer 11

well if you have a way to get to her then what you need to do is one of a couple of things.

1. sit down face to face with her and talk about it and see where it goes.

2. when you see her the first chance that you get and the two of you are alone just move in and try to give a kiss. if she wants you then you will know instantly. if she doesn't want you then she will let you know that she just wants to be friends.

there is nothing wrong with trying either one of these methods as you may find out that she wants you as much as you want her. you will never know unless you try.