What's the funniest thing your toddler has ever done?

Question

Ten points to the person who puts the biggest smile on my face! I'll start things off with one of my own:

Our old house in Anchorage had a small window in the hallway of the third floor, and my wife would leave it open in the summertime for ventilation. One day (my son was not quite two) one of the cats was sitting on the window sill watching the birds fly by. My son walks right up to the cat and shoves him out the window with both hands. Then he turns to me, with a big smile on his face, and says "Kitty jumped!"

(And no, the cat was fine; there was a small ledge just outside the window that he landed on...)

Answer 1

When my son was a little more than 2 years old, we went to my MIL's mother's funeral. The priest was reading something and when he closed his book, my son said, "THE END!" really loud! All the adults had to force themselves not to laugh as we shushed him.

Answer 2

Thanks for putting a smile on my face!

I teach preschool and daily, have a funny story for my husband. Here are some favorites.

Two 3 year old girls were riding tricycles. One bumped into the one if front of her and said "F***ing traffic!"

A 4 year old boy got some new shoes. After showing me he said "Look how fast these shoes make me run!"

I was counting with a 4 year old from 1 to 10. When we got to 10 he looked up and said "10 is the lottest number." (he meant the highest number).

A little girl was singing the days of the week song. She sang "Sunday, Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday" stopped and looked and me and said "Thursday we're going to Disneyland!!!!"

A little boy was polishing an anatomically correct moose and said "I'm just polishing his johnson."

A 3 year old once said "I saw a tiger yesterday a long time ago."

I had a 4 year old student that was walking through the puddles after the rain. I told him that his feet will get all wet and it won't be very comfortable if he keeps walking through them. He decided to do it anyway. He later came to me very distraught and said "My shoes are all wet. My socks are all wet. My feet are all wet. It sucks!"

We had a police officer visit the school. When he left, a 4 year old girl said to me "He didn't even try and shoot us!"

I love my job!

Answer 3

Last night we were watching Celebrity Duets, next thing I hear is a bunch of screeching and babbling, I looked over there is my daughter standing on the en-table with a remote and she was singing and dancing , she even sang with her eyes closed and swayed back and forth. When a hipper tune came on she would shake her little tooshie and sing with the remote. I had to keep all my laughs in so that It would stop, but I wish I new were my camcorder was. My daughter is only 2 3/4 s it was cute.

Answer 4

[WOW -- you have quite the collection of responses to choose from! Great question!]

Since I am "mom o 4", I can tell you many stories, but two stories (one from each of my two oldest kids) stand out at the moment:

1) My daughter was asking me for something or to do something (I no longer remember what), and for some reason I said, "Ask your father." So we called Daddy at work and got his voicemail. She was confused, so I explained that Daddy couldn't answer his phone and when the recording of his voice stopped and she heard the beep, she could leave him a message. So....she listened, then talked for a while, and when she hung up, she said to me, excitedly, "He said yes!"

2) My son, then four, had seen me nurse his baby sister many times. One day while we were eating lunch at church, seated next to the pastor's wife no less, he suddenly looked at me and said, "Mommy, if you are so widdle [little], why do you have such big ne-nes?"

Answer 5

I have a little sister who is 20 years younger than me. She was a daddy's girl like you wouldn't believe. When she was about 2 years old our father bought a new truck. She was so excited, that's all the could talk about, she chattered constantly about "Daddy's new truck". One day my mother, sister, and I were getting out of said truck at grocery store and the windows were rolled down. She saw a couple getting into their car next to us and excitedly exclaimed "We went for a ride in my new daddy's truck!" My mother and I hurried inside with her, laughing all the way at the thought that those people were wondering what kind of woman my mother was, parading men in and out of her child's life or something, like the flavor of the week.

Answer 6

I was cooking dinner when the phone rings. My daughter(4years old) picked up the phone right away. After awhile my daughter is talking for 10 minutes on the phone. I went upstairs to see who and what she was talking about. I get the phone and my aunt is on the other end. She says that she asked my daughter where was your mother. My daughter said she's not here. My aunt said that can't be your mommy would get in trouble if she left you home by yourself. So my aunt asked where is your mom. My daughter said quit asking where my mommy is. Auntie if you don't quit asking where my mommy is I will call the police now whats your address.

Answer 7

We were eating dinner at a restaurant and there was a family at the next table with their baby (probably a year old or so). Everyone at the restaurant was talking pretty loud and all of the sudden their son let out this huge scream! Everyone got quiet and looked at him and my cousin (who's 4) was just sitting there singing "That hurt my ears!"

Answer 8

Wow! What a good post! I Love reading stories about the funny things kids do. I have a 3 year old and he's full of funny things. Here are a couple he's done lately:

He loves to watch Shrek. Well one night my husband and I took him out on the patio and we all laid down and looked at the stars. He was in the middle of us. He started saying a whole bunch of mumbo jumbo, then turns to me and goes "Right Donkey?" and I responded with "right Shrek" just to see what he'd do....he then turned to my husband and said "right Princess?"

My little guy is very close to his paternal grandparents, and 2 months ago we moved about an hour away from them. One day he was sitting on the front couch looking out the window, and he said "Grandpa's truck is broken, he needs to fix it so he can come visit me!" then he looked over to me and said "mommy, call Grandpa so I can tell him!" So he called Grandpa and told him his truck was broken and he needed to fix it and come visit. (my father in law's truck wasn't broken)

One day we were visiting my parents (2 and a half hours away). My dad has been keeping our dog for us, because we lived in apartments and he's a 122 pound Alaskan Malamute (which just wouldn't be fair to him). Well My dad has become quite fond of the dog (Rascal) and my dad will go in his back yard and hit golf balls, and Rascal will fetch them. Well, my dad was showing us their "trick" and we (my mom, dad, husband, myself, and our two boys) were playing around. Well after a while, the adults sat in the lawn chairs to visit, and around the corner of the house comes my son on all fours with a golf ball in his mouth, he ran up to my dad, and dropped it at his feet. He proceded to give a couple "bark! bark!". At that point we were all laughing so hard, and he was looking at us like "what? Isn't that what I'm supposed to do?"

Isn't it funny the messages we send our children. They get EVERYTHING from their surroundings, yet sometimes they say things, I think, Just to brighten our days!

Thanks for sharing!

Answer 9

My two year old is always doing cute stuff. The best is when she tries to make her younger sister laugh. She will do anything to make her laugh! Her favorite thing is to stand in the middle of the room, throw her arms out, yell at her sister to look, throws her head back and spins in circles. Then she gets so dizzy that she either falls over, or walks like a drunk sailor!! She has ran into the wall when she is dizzy like this. It's great fun to watch!!

The cutest thing she has done lately is this: we went to my in-laws, they live on a farm. Next door is my husbands uncle- father in laws brother. They have goats, kids and adults. She went over to see the goats and got right down by the fence. The kids came over and she procceded to give each baby goat a kiss. She thought it was great that they kissed back!! I really wish I would have had my camera. It was the funniest thing ever!!

We are trying to potty train her, and she hasn't figured out that it's ok to go potty in her potty. The other day, she wanted to sit on the potty without her diaper on. I got her on the potty and this look came over her face. She got really quiet and then she said "uh oh!" I looked and she had peed in the potty. I was so proud of her, but she was crying and crying. I told her it was alright, and I started to laugh. She cried even harder that I was laughing. It was so funny!!!

Answer 10

lately my son (26 months) has been saying "yep" after everything. Probably because whenever he states a fact I say "yep thats right". this morning he got up before daddy and we were in the kitchen and he was talking kinda loud so i said "shhh" and he says "daddy sleepin'....yep (nodding head)" i couldn't help but chuckle. It's amazing how they can go from not talking at all to full blown sentences. He also (daddy is a potty mouth construction worker) says "jesus christ man!" whenever he finds it necessary. I know most of you won't find that funny but it puts a smile on my face to hear a 2 year old say that.

Answer 11

Cute stories!! One day my cars' battery died and my husband couldn't jump start it so we called AAA and the man came out with the big truck. My son was very curious about what he was doing so I told him the car was hurt and that the guy was like a doctor. So he looks at me and asks "is the car going to get a band-aid too?".