2006-09-14 22:51:54 · 19 answers · asked by zani h 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
■№ ■ but found this
Can You Trust Them? Here"s How to Tell
First off, let me start by saying I used to always give dates the benefit of the doubt. But, after finding out my latest infatuation was really married (and keeping it secret!), I became more cautious. Be a skeptic online, and here"s some tips that can help you avoid the problems I had:
The warnings to look for include
Drug, Alcohol or Smoking Habits, Any of these can be relationship disasters, you should carefully evaluate whether or not you want the chaos that can go with someone who has a problem. Usually, it"s better to find someone else.
How to tell?
There are usually symptoms that you can see,
absences, excuses, missing money, they take too much time off from work or are sick as an excuse, there may even be obvious signs like alcohol, smoke or drug materials around their living space (though they typically hide these things).
Appearance different from what you expected. For some reason, dates online frequently use outdated 7-year old pictures, or may even use somebody else"s photo, to misrepresent their appearance. It"s bad to use a photo of yourself without the wrinkles and extra pounds that were added in recent years!
One of the first things you should ask for via email is a recent photo that"s been taken in the last year. If you are thinking of meeting someone from out of country , you may want to request that they fax you a copy of their current drivers" license (with address obscured) to verify their age and appearance.
Jobless dates looking for support Realize that there"s a lot of dates who need a meal ticket, and can try to exploit you and use you to support them. Whether they want you to fall in love with them and have them move in with you (for free rent) or obvious ploys like emergencies that they want your money for, avoid these dates at all costs. Because it you don"t.
How to deal with it? I ask dates what they"re currently doing for a living, and also subtly tell dates upfront that I believe nobody should need to give money or housing to another person for the first year or so they"re in a relationship. This is plenty of time to evaluate their character (or lack thereof!).
Married dates, or those already in relationships Many married guys go online looking for excitement, to find mistresses. Don"t become the "other woman" in somebody"s marriage (or guys, become that second boyfriend in your girls" life). You should, after a few emails, ask who else is in there life, if they"re living alone or not, and when their last relationship ended.
Once you exchange mobile numbers, you should be able to call him or her at home at, say, 9pm at night, without always getting an answering machine. Be especially suspicious if they try to offer an excuse for not giving you their home mobile number ( again, after you"ve corresponded online for ahwile and are ready to talk, don"t rush). What"s to hide?
Good luck out there - there"s good dates and bad. Assume the worst, til they"ve earned and proven their trustworthiness. Don"t accept gifts or provide any (or especially, money) to others, til you"ve known them for at least a year.
http://kinkyygalls.wordpress.com/2006/04/14/can-you-trust-internet-dating/
2006-09-14 22:56:12 · answer #1 · answered by away right now 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No more than I'd trust any other type of "blind date". Dangerous people can get on the Internet just as easily as they can walk into bars...and spend less money looking for vunerable, overly trusting people.
I have a girlfriend who does Internet dating, but runs a background check on them before she accepts the first date. She's saved herself some issues that way. Hasn't weeded out everything, but does eliminate ones with a prison record.
2006-09-15 05:56:13 · answer #2 · answered by Kaia 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
absolutley not... people use the internet to hide.
Dating sites are full of people wanting to be something else.
2006-09-15 07:33:55 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
takes a while to get to know the person (nice, helpful, ambitious, etc), because you don't see them at work, with friends, etc. very easy way to just date and not worry about akwardness later since they probably don't share your social circle. so if you are nice and sincere, be careful. but if you are just shopping go for it.
2006-09-15 05:55:58 · answer #4 · answered by Depressed 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you meet the person and go on dates with them. You'll know what kind of character they are and if they are your type.
2006-09-15 05:55:20 · answer #5 · answered by Blah Blah Blah 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
nope, not at all. ppl show you and tell you what they want to tell you. when they could be pedophiles rapists or killers. majority of the people trying to date online are those psychos so beware.
2006-09-15 05:56:12 · answer #6 · answered by Christa 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why not. Nothing venture nothing gain.
2006-09-15 06:04:53 · answer #7 · answered by willibwa 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
no!never trust them!!!
2006-09-15 06:21:33 · answer #8 · answered by Deea 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No
2006-09-15 05:57:07 · answer #9 · answered by brown_sugah064 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No
2006-09-15 05:53:14 · answer #10 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋