i m married last many years and i have kids and they are like 5 and 7. .but even now they think that what i tell them is not right for them. when i was a kid i never went against my dad and mom .may be i thought they were wrong but i was so obident that even if i felt wrong i did what was told ,but now the kids always want to offence their parents on smal things ,for example if i want them to eat or study or sleep they have their own ideas.they want to teach me what is good for them. they r not religious and they just want to be free and free and free all the time .where as at my time we did what exactaly was told to us by our fathr or mother .who should be blamed for this?????????
2006-09-14 21:31:26 · 9 answers · asked by jasmine 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
DO NOT BLAME TO KIDS ALL PROBLEMS ARE WITH US. FIRST OF ALL WE DO NOT PAY MUCH TIME TO KIDS. THEY REMAIN BUSY IN THEIR SCHOOL ACTIVITY AND WE REMAIN BUSY IN OUR BUSINESS. AT THE NIGHT WE TAKE OUR DINNER AND SIT IN FRONT OF TV. NO BODY LISTEN OR TELL PROBLEM TO EACH OTHER. EARLIER PARENTS AT THE NIGHT TELL STORY TO THEIR CHILDREN AND CHILDREN ALSO TELL ANY PROBLEMS THEY HAVE. CHILDREN TAKE GUIDANCE FROM THE PARENTS. IN THESE ON TUTOR ARE FOR THIS JOB. PAY TIME TO CHILDREN AND CHILDREN WILL LISTEN YOU.
2006-09-17 23:40:10 · answer #1 · answered by RAMAN IOBIAN 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Television. I see so many shows were the kids talk back, **** off, tell their parents to go to h..... For many years. If all kids watch TV like they do and see this, they think it is normal and OK.
I blame Hollwood, and the government for letting them put all kind off things on TV and movies. years ago you never saw that behavior.
It's on almost every show. What is the parent suppose to lock 99% of the channels. And on TV the parents usually just let them walk away. I would have gotten punished or yelled at on the spot.
or a good belt whipping if I was really bad.
And I turned out just fine. I'm not a serial killer or child beater.
the society, with their ( time outs ) etc. are all crazy.
2006-09-14 22:09:11 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you should stop blaming your kids and take a good look in the mirror.
They are 5 and 7 their behavior is nothing to do with "their generation" what a redioculous thing to say, perhaps you were differant as a child, but as a rule for time as far as it goes back small children push their boundies and see how much they can get away with, (and yes all they want to do is have fun that is because they are children!) if you are not giving them strong enough boundries that is your falt not theirs.
5 and 7 years olds do not no what is good for them! they just no what they want.
Even the best behaved kids (and mine are not!) will be bad some times how you handle that bad behavior is what counts.
you need to give them what is good for them, and a little of what they want, you need to give them love and atention but also teach them that there are times when they need to be quiet if you have no faith in your kids and put no effort into teaching them lifes lessons how can you expecty them to behave well?
2006-09-14 21:57:49 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
congratulations first on being married and staying married. that's one of the best things you can do for your kids. If you and your husband love and care for each other it will be a stable environment for the children. You do not mention the father much in your questions about what to do about the kids. He really should be actively involved in both loving and disciplining them, alongside you. If you're really together it'll be two adults vs two kids. You should win (and in some sense it is a battle of wills). but if you're not at it together, 100%, they will try to divide and conquer. That's not that they're monsters. It's just selfish, self-centred human nature. Especially at this age, they are trying to assert their independence as well, trying to form their own character and identity. It's not a bad thing that they should have thier own ideas. The thing is to get them to express thier opinions but for them to know at the end of the day, it's you two who decide. You decide how much telly they should watch, how long on the computer, when they go to bed. They are bound to want things that aren't good for them, but it's not up to them. You really need to establish who is boss now or you'll run into big problems when they're older.
My six year old knows my wife and I love her very much, but she is also ever so slightly scared of us as well. She knows that if we threaten to discipline her, she only gets one warning before we carry out that discipline. They've got to know who's boss - they really do. As the book of Proverbs says 'Spare the rod and spoil the child'. While I am not AT ALL suggesting you hit your kids with a stick, they do need to know that you are in charge.
It seems to me, (and apologies if I'm wrong) that you seem quite tired and depressed, at your wits end. I don't know how much time you get to just do fun things, on your own and with your husband, but you need to take time out, to keep your own inner resources strong, to know how to deal with the kids. You need time out.
Finally, and by no means lastly, pray. Because God gives us strength and wisdom when we ask him. Your local church may have folk who can help (if you're part of a church, that is : and the comments about religion tell me you might be). Church friends will not only pray with you but will help you with babysitting. there may even be courses to help.
2006-09-18 00:12:19 · answer #4 · answered by PastorChris 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
To improve your relations with kids and make them obedient is indeed a task nowadays! One way is with understanding and care and nother is deprive them of what they like and discipline them. Give them examples of love for God and fear if not towards God to make them religious.They are mostly influenced by other kids -so check their company and control them. More so we parents have to be a good example for them and friendly to make them understand. Best of luck!
2006-09-14 22:35:07 · answer #5 · answered by anil m 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If they r not religious and u r, no offence, it isn't them... u r not parenting right. U should have told them what God did from an early age. FALIURE!!!!
2006-09-14 21:37:33 · answer #6 · answered by Ben M 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Dont get upset by saying that ur kids doesn't listen u but be cautious that they are watching you!!!!!!!!!
2006-09-17 18:16:45 · answer #7 · answered by bipsara_jain 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Eminem.:)
2006-09-14 21:57:06 · answer #8 · answered by fleur 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's all about how you talk to him.
2006-09-14 21:33:03 · answer #9 · answered by Andy K 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋