Is something wrong with my nephew?

Question

The age difference between my son and nephew is only 7 mths. Its not only different in age but in developmental (physically and mentally) as well. I'm not trying to say that my son is better or clever. Juz that my nephew is coming to 4 years old and he still doesn't know how to talk and communicate with ppl. He will shouts and scream for no reason. Sometimes when my both boys (4 years old and 2 years old) wanted to play with him, he will scream at the top of his voice. I have no idea y he did that. At times I happened to look at him in the eyes, he seems so 'empty', as though he is in his own world. I'm worried for him as he will be in Nursery nxt year. Each time when we tell his mother, my sis-in-law abt this, she said " Maybe his developmental is slower. Never mind. We will observe again." She will never accept our advise in bringing him to see a doctor or a Specialist. Can anyone tell me whats wrong with my nephew and how do I get my sis-in-law to bring him for further check-up?

Answer 1

if he is 4 and not communicating then there is something not right. He really needs an evaluation. Do some research on the internet regarding child development, and let her know what you found. also let her know that you are only concerned for him because you love him, and want to help him.
There is nothing wrong with you being concerned about your nephew. She should have taken him to see someone a year or two ago if he is not communicating. If you cannot talk to her, talk to your brother. She seems like she is in denial. good luck.

Answer 2

Without knowing more about the situation, and without being a professional, I do think it would be helpful for your sister-in-law to accept that there is nothing wrong with having a child's development checked out. I repeat I am not a professional but have you read about any symptoms of the various different kinds of autism that are surprisingly prevalent in children? For god's sake don't mention that word autism to her but perhaps read about it yourself and if you think it might be a possibility, talk to your own doctor in depth about the issue. Go see someone yourself on her behalf before you discuss it with her further. It could be that this boy really is totally fine and just developing differently - kids develop at different rates - or it could be that there is something there that would benefit from diagnosis. For all I know from what you've told us, it also could be that his home environment could be offering him more. I am hesitant to judge but you seem concerned. Do some research yourself. It might be better to annoy your in-law than to allow a serious problem to go unaddressed.

Good luck and be sensitive and make sure, talk to your own child specialist before doing anything more.

Answer 3

Some kids are just late to develop, but better safe than sorry. Have you tried talking with the boys father? Maybe mom won't do anything, but that doesn't mean dad won't. I don't think anyone on yahoo answers is going to be able to diagnoise the child without acutally seeing him. Many things have the same signs/problems. A specialist would need to see him and observe him.

Answer 4

Without the chance to actively observe this child, it is hard to say for sure what to suspect. I work with children with developmental disabilities, and at the very least- he sounds as if there are some speech and language issues. As for seeming as if he is in his own world- this is something to be more concerned about. Does he seem this way most of the time, or does it seem more like daydreaming? My first instinct, (again, without the chance to observe behaviors) is autism. Does he get upset if there are changes to his routine or someone wants him to do something he doesn't want to? Does he pay attention to inappropriate parts of a toy instead of playing with the toy as intended? (such as spinning the wheels of a car instead of pretend driving the car). These are other red flags to be aware of. The hard part is getting someone in denial to take action... no parent wants to believe that their child is "broken" or "defective" in any way. Parents will be put on the defensive if others (especially family members) say there may be something off. It can take up to 20 times of different people saying that there may be something wrong before a parent takes action to get their child help. Unfortunately, this means a delay in the child getting the help they need. If she won't listen to you, then perhaps some pamphlets may help. Look into information on speech delays and autism (if you think he shows red flags for this disorder) and print out some info off the web. You can also get information from your local school district. Once the child is enrolled in school, the teacher may suspect a delay, and may refer them, but don't count on it. Although a teacher may notice a delay, they (at least in the US) are not required to have any child development classes and may not know what is typical of different delays/disorders. So, you have to be sympathetic to the parent, who may not want to admit the child has a problem- but- you also want to get the child some help. This is a delicate balance, and one you have to approach carefully. Perhaps phrase it as, "I am concerned about some of the behaviors I have seen. I looked up this information for you, and this is what I found." Good luck.

Answer 5

Put yourself in her shoes no woman wants to hear that there is anything wrong with her child, she may feel that in a way you are saying that your children are smarter and better than hers although that may not be the case. From what it soundls like he may be autistic and probably needs help with his speech or something along those lines. Dont be really pushy when you give her advice because she wont take it into consideration just let her know that "its ok and maybe it would be best to get her son checked out just to be on the safe side."

Answer 6

Tr Lots of lucky to keep talking to the child, then citing some imaginary examples to your sister-in-law let her know why her son should be checked up by the doctors so that his treatment can be started at an early age to help him better in later life when he grows bigger and has to face the cruel world outside. Lots of luck.

Answer 7

Sounds like a some form of autism, but I'm not a specialist. You really won't have to do anything. He'll be introduced to public school next year, and they will quickly inform his mother that he needs to see a specialist if something is wrong. Sometimes it takes a complete stranger informing you for something to sink in.

Answer 8

Ok every child is different do begin with,My sister didnt start talking till the age of 5yrs old. It can be alot of things for one not enough attention or volcal is not fully developed and is weak, He shouts and screams for no reason cuz he is trying to communicate. it isnt for no reason that he is doing it . Its really sad actually.His eyes are emty cuz he is in his own world and no one seems to want to meet him there. Ok his mother is either in denial or just shrugging it off like nothing, blinded to that fact her child is crying out for help. Easter Seals goes to the house and does speach therapy for children like this tell ur sister in law this and mention to her they are really good and i guarenttee he will me READING by age 4 and half.

Answer 9

I dont know what country your from but in Australia we have mandatory visits with health nurses who are check the development of children . If any development delays are noticed they are referred to specialists. I think its very important this child gets checked out by a professional ,maybe you should talk with your brother and get himto take the child to a doctor. Sounds like your sister in law is in denial.If your brother wont listen you should talk to your doctor and find out a way to deal with this situation before it gets out of hand.

Answer 10

there is definately something wrong. and your sister in law is either a damn fool or just doen't care. In my eyes she is neglecting the child of a normal childhood, sounds like he may be deaf. If she won't take him into a doctor, then maybe you can. or tell her that it is her responsibility to see that her child be taken care of. it sounds like she doesn't care about the boy. i know that it may seem like a harse thing to do and that it could cause problems with your relationship with her, but someone has to put their foot down for the childs well being. He is being cheated. and neglected, and in my book abused. Make her take him into a doctor as soon as possible. good luck