My boyfriend is talking to other girls behind my back. & i KNOW it. but cant dump him, why?!?

Question

My boyfriend has talked on aol to his EX GFs in the past, not just talked but liek talking about what it would be like if they were still together and flirting with them and even asking them to come over and calling them names like hun. I know this for a fact because they have showed me the converstions. It has happened numerous times, I have called him on it and we almost broke up cuz it, this was a year ago. and now he is doing it AGAIN. but i cant seem to break up with him after 3 years. why not? what should i do? please help me

I feel like i am in denial, like it is a dream that he isnt actually serious. i keep making excuses for him.

Answer 1

I understand your feeling that way. You don't want to lose him, you love him. You don't want to break up with him because you don't want to give him or the girls the satisfaction. Take a break and I bet he will be crawling back. They always do. "They don't know what they had until it's gone".

Answer 2

OK those showing you the conversations have a scheme in mind and well from your reactions its working. Women like to rub things in sometimes - you know that! Secondly the guy is wrong for taking the conversation into the "i wonder what it would be like were we still together" phase as thats a no no! You cant seem to leave him coz your hooked! SO to answer your question, you dont need to surround yourself with being unsettled by what these other females are doing (they need a life), you need to dump the guy coz if hes still wasting time on "remenising" then your clearly a second choice and you need to be a first choice and finally you need to get a new addiction that consumes you through your walking away from him process and before you know it the breakup will have been done and you will find you coped without him

Answer 3

The fact that the kind of thing he is doing disturbs you and that you have told him you do not like it and he still does not care is an indication that he does not care about your feelings. And the fact that he is doing it behind your back is an indication of dishonesty on his part. What are you doing talking to your boyfriend's ex-girlfriends? Especially to the extent that they can show you the conversations that they have with him? Can you lift yourself out of their class... they are his past, let them stay there. If you want to know something about your boyfriend, ask HIM! Stop discussing issues of your relationships with his ex-girlfriends, you are only giving them an opportunity to hurt you, and remember that not all exes want to remain that way, some want to make a comeback, and I pity you if you will be talking with an ex wanting to make that comeback, they will just poison your mind against that man and take him up the minute you dump him. Talk to your man and tell him what you dont like and if he cannot stop it, and you feel that you should not put up with it, then move on. You have to share the same principles for your relationship to work. And steer clear of his ex-girlfriends.

Answer 4

I've heard before that advice is what we ask for when we know the right answer and don't like it. You seem to have a clear idea about whether you're okay with what he did or not. You just don't like the idea of pursuing what you think is right.

Look inside yourself for the answer. Realize what it is that you most want, and take that path. And once you decide, don't regret it. Hearing other people give you their opinions will help you. When someone says "leave him" do you get a worse feeling than when someone says "forgive him?" Or the other way around? Use that gut feeling. Our instincts are right the vast majority of the time.

Answer 5

Your own low self esteem or fear of being alone or possibly believing in the myth that there is only one "Mr Right" for you and what if he is the one......any of these could be the reason you don't let him go. Take some time and ask yourself why! Only you know the real answer to this one. Another method is to ask yourself what you would tell your best friend about this situation if it were happening to her. Sometimes it helps you distance yourself emotionally and lets you see the situation for what it really is. You don't deserve to be treated like this and all you are teaching him by staying is that it is alright.

Answer 6

YES...... Just remember your happiness should come first, it going to be hard to leave a person after 3 years but does it make sense to be with a person you can't trust. You also need some good friend to stand by you to give the strength and confidence you need to leave him. GOOD LUCK

Answer 7

what should you do?!? helloooo?you know things for a fact and you are still in denial. i know you are in love but nobody deserves that kinda treatment. you have to be aware of something: if he gets back to his ex, he'll dump you, so be the first one and dump him...it's easier now than later after you waste few more years on him...

Answer 8

GET RID OF HIM---I cant emphasize it enough. Too many women trap themselves for too long. Perhaps deep down inside you either love him too much to let him go OR you dont expect to find anything better. These are problems that can only be solved by walking away.

Answer 9

ur bf is such a casanova, well thats the fact about most guys, but its ur own decision, either u dump him or move on with ur rltionship. but if u feel miserable and his flirting pisses u and u feel like he is pushing u around then there is no point in going on. ryt?thats the reason why god put our heads above our heart.

Answer 10

You need to face the facts and do what you think is best. Does it not hurt you that he is doing these things. I am sure it does and he will always hurt you. You need him out of your life. You do not deserve to be with someone who hurts you so much. You need to be with someone who does not talk to his ex, you need to be with someone who loves you and will do anything for you, not other girls.