Do you honestly think...?

Question

Do you honestly think, as a parent, there is a way to prevent pre-marital sex? Why or why not? Of course we want to protect our kids but what preventive measures will you take when your kids come to the age where sex is a possibility? Will you wait for them to come to you--or will you make the first move? And finally, when do you think we should start talking to our kids about sex?

Also--would you treat a son differently then a daughter when the topic of sex comes up?

People keep on saying when s/he is "old enough" or "mature" enough. I believe we should talk about sex with our kids as young as possible--it gets eaiser with time so I think by the time they have sex they'll be comfortable about it.

Answer 1

I don't think there is any "foolproof" way to prevent pre-marital sex but I feel talking with your child openly & honestly is the most important thing. Many kids get their "information" from friends, internet or tv and the "facts" may not be correct at all. I don't think it is ever too early to begin talking about sex with children once they become curious but you have to do it very age appropriately.

Answer 2

I don't think that there is any way to prevent it. My mother gave me all of "the talks" and I still did it. I believe that it is all in way that you raise your child but I still believe that if a child wants to have sex then he or she will. I plan on putting my daughter on birth control when she gets in her first serious relationship or when I believe that she is having sex. I will also give my daughter condoms when she turns 14. I know from my own experience that I never came to my mother when I was thinking about having sex. I will not wait for my daughter to come to me. I will go to her first and I will start talking to her about sex young. Like 10 maybe 12. I would never treat my son or daughter different when it comes to the topic of sex. I believe that it is the responsibility of both the girl and the boy to be safe and you protection! I am willing to do anything to prevent my daughter from getting pregnant early the way I did. I want her to get the most out of life!

Answer 3

I am as honest with my daughter as I can be she is only 8 years old and has already started asking questions about sex. I tell her what I think she is ready to hear, I tell her that it is something we do with people that we love and are married to and it is how we make babies. We just had a son so that is what started her question asking. I hope that my husband and I will not talk differently to our son and daughter about sex it is such a double standard. I understand that our daughters can end up pregnant but our sons can get someone pregnant too. Maybe that is why we have so many kids with absent fathers today, because we teach our daughters that they should be careful but we say nothing to the boys! We teach them without saying it that It is the girls problem not the boys

Answer 4

i have talked a little bit about it with my 6 year old son, i guess i feel like they see it t.v. and kids these days seem to be growing alot faster and they know alot more about things then i did at 6. i definitely wouldn't treat my daughter(i don't have one yet) any different then my son. it always takes to people have sex not just one. if my son got some girl pregnant i would be upset but what are you gonna do about it. i was 16 when i got pregnant. I'm still with the guy (now my husband) and we have 2 beautiful little boys. I think that when kids start acting like they know a little bit about it then its time to talk to them about. my son started becoming really interested in t.v. shows that involved people kissing and before he would look away and say gross, now he stares, so my husband and i blocked every channel in his room except Disney and Nickelodeon and Boomerang, those are the only channels that he is allowed to watch. I don't know if this makes sense or not but that's what we did.

Answer 5

I think that 13 is a good age to strike a conversation about sex.. I would probably make the first move if they never asked about it. You just have to be open with them their whole lives that way they won't become whores and sleep around. There really is nothing you can do to prevent it unless you watch them 24/7 and monitor their phone calls and everything they do on the computer. If you have good values and morals in your home then you will have better luck with what your children do.

Answer 6

If you start young with communication with your child " by starting young,I am saying that no matter what you are doing,when they ask you a question,stop what you are doing and give your child full attention"and keep that communication open they are more likely to come to you for information about sex than to go elsewhere.By starting young they will have grown to trust your advice by the time they reach puberty. If you demand that they not have sex at a young age you are almost insuring that they will!You'll know when it is time for the sex talk, boys and girls alike tend to behave differently when they begin to notice the opposite sex. They become more aware of what clothes look the best,their hair and they even tend to act more adult like, boys tend to walk around with a smile and girls giggle more!
I think the best a parent can do is to stay two steps ahead of your child,be in tuned to their feelings. A mom can usually look at her child and know what's going on by the expression on their face. Be truthful in what you tell them. Intervien when you feel it is necessary. I will never forget the look on a paticular young man's face when he arrived at our house for his first date with my daughter. She had already told him he had to come to the door for her not to just pull up and toot the car horn. I invited him in and we talked and as they were about to leave I looked him straight in the eye and said" my daughter is leaving here a virgin and she best come home the same way" He said "yes mam" that was 5 years ago. They are now married and expecting their first baby shortly after the new year!

Answer 7

There is no way to prevent pre-marital sex if the kids are going to do it they don't need a specific time of day or a specific place.

The best way to prevent pre-marital sex is to be able to talk with your kids bluntly (no cutesy names) and talk to them about the consequences of what could happen. (Pregnancy is not the worse, aids is which is followed by death). I started talking to my son when he was about 10 years old. And no, I didn't wait for him to come to me.

Answer 8

I'm not sure you can prevent it but you can educate. I'll start talking to my daughter as soon as she's ready I don't think there is a magic age. I also would treat a son differently than my daughter boys are stronger than girls so therefore more risks for girls. I know I have been in that boat to many times and would hate to see my girl go through what I did.

Answer 9

I don't think there is a way to stop premarital sex. You need to educate your children and tell them what you want and expect of them. I have a six year old daughter and she know a little about sex, she does not know that you insert tab B into slot A. By the time she is 10 or so she will know everything about where and how babies come to be, what sexual intercorse is, and how to prevent unwanted pregnancy. It's not easy to have these talks but I want her to know the truth from me and not get infor from other kids who don't know what they are talking about. I will provide condoms and put her on the pill when she is old enough.
I think we should talk about sex like we talk about stranger danger to our children. When they ask you questions answer honestly and just answer what they are asking until they are old enought to understand more.

Answer 10

No, I don't think YOU can prevent it but if you instill a good core moral value in your child, hopefully they will make smart choices. Personally I'm hoping my daughter waits until she is in a mature, monogamous relationship first. I'd like to think that I wouldn't treat a son any differently.