(plz bare in mind i've been raped twice).. i don't knpow how weird this will sound ..but when i'm with my bf i prefer to pleasure him than to pleasue myself...i notice myself always removing his hand or moving away from him.. but when its him i'm all his..i seriously dont mind him doing whatever or me doing whatever for him to please him.. he says he hates that cause thats more what a bit*ch would do.. pleae him, and leave,...i'm seriouly not even close to that .hes the only guy i've willingly been with.. i guess i don't finf pleasure to please myself through him.. i dont mind it.. but i don't want him to get annoyed by it..he says that i'm used to backing off a guy a just giving him what he wants and i gotta change and look for myself..help//what shal i do//
2006-09-14 14:34:48 · 9 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Well, he's right in that you do need to seek help for yourself. Having been raped twice, I can understand why even someone touching you would set off nothing but bad memories. However, you should realize that it is OK for you to experience pleasure as well. I would imagine that is what he's trying to tell you. I'm sure that he just wants to reciprocate what you are giving to him. He would enjoy making you feel good as well. Is it wrong to pleasure him while you don't receive satisfaction? Well, technically no, but you should get counseling or something for this, because you deserve to experience lovemaking the way it's supposed to be, not the way some rapists do it. I hope this helps, honey. Good luck and God Bless!
2006-09-14 14:39:51 · answer #1 · answered by kevin_p0 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
my dear, u need to have more time to your own life and that include your job, dream in life, family, friends and give him some breather. life will be more balance as u do not focus on your bf alone. don't place all your eggs in a single basket. listen to his views and try to act on it moderately and i believe your relationship will be much closer than before. remember a relationship is like flying a kite, sometime u have to let go, some time to pull it back. God bless.
2006-09-14 21:56:27 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Only therapy will help! Talk to a counselor and keep going to work through this for the both of you!!!!
2006-09-14 21:39:17 · answer #3 · answered by mustanglady 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
what your doing is rejecting him wheather you relize it or not. men hate rejection. He will leave you and then what. Get Help some women who are raped actually were aroused and get the rape and natural arrousal confused. Have fun.
2006-09-14 21:49:41 · answer #4 · answered by the_wire_monkey 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you need to trust him that he wont hurt you, or he will get fed up and leave you... hes different to those who raped you because he cares and he wants to make you feel happy... give him a chance.
2006-09-14 21:38:30 · answer #5 · answered by i_love_orange_crush_05 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
nothing you really can do but try to be comfortable with him l ike that. time will help that. why don't you try to explain your situation with him? like why you have a hard time letting him do stuff to you
2006-09-14 21:38:40 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
i had the same problem,but we talked about it and decided to get me in the mood,and it worked.he is thoughtful to say the least.
2006-09-14 21:38:44 · answer #7 · answered by katea o 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
no it isn't he should be hapy then u can just not fel like somthing bad will happen to u just don't worry if he doesn't understand just explain it to him u want him happy he can please u later with something else
2006-09-14 21:41:51 · answer #8 · answered by sarah 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
did you tell your boyfriend what you just told us? try explaining to him how you feel.. i don't think it sounds wierd at all...you just want to and like to please your boyfriend that's all. good luck
2006-09-14 21:39:10 · answer #9 · answered by g.i. janee 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋