I've always felt emotionally attracted to women growing up. I'm 28 now. I believe I've been in love with at least 3 women in the past. However, when it comes to men, I can say they're attractive, but I don't get the same emotional connective feelings I do with women. I've never been in love with a man before. However, I have been forcing myself to date men in hopes of maybe "one day" , I'll become connected to a man. Plus, my family is religous and I hear in the back of my mind all the time that being a lesbian is wrong. My theory is that it's not fair. It's not fair to have these emotional feelings toward women and not be able to act on them without society getting wrilled up about it. What do you think I should do?
To me, I believe sexuality is based on emotions rather than being a sexual issue.
2006-09-14 13:59:14 · 6 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
I do find men attractive, but I just don't get that "warm fuzzy" feeling with them. With women , I do by just one glance at them...
2006-09-14 14:00:10 · update #1
Not only is my family religous, but I have wonders too about if it's wrong and if Satan is the one tempting me to be with a woman...My Mom even told me that those who tell me it's ok to be gay and God loves me regardless is also a sin because it's condoning it...I don't know...What you thnk?
2006-09-14 14:01:54 · update #2
Do what you think is right. In my opinion, why would you listen to some chovanistic male authors of a book rather than your own heart? If it is that big of a problem with your family, then they aren't doing the Christian thing, they aren't doing the Muslim thing, they aren't doing anything right because what I was always taught about religion is that we have to be tolerant, non-judgemental, and open to every living thing. Do you really want to go through the rest of your life with a male - someone that you don't necessarily love, but like - for the rest of your life for the sole reason of having your family apporve? Face it, you wouldn't be happy at all and neither would your male partner in said hypothetical situation.
Do what you feel is right, love whoever you want to love, and be happy! After all, you're living your life for YOU right?? Why live for someone else when this is all we have right now? A lot of things in life are hard, but if your family is any kind of loving religious people, they'd accept you as who you are and not really care what you do behind closed doors. I mean, if they love you now and you're attracted to the same sex, why should anything change if you tell them that this is who you are and what you prefer?? Good luck and I hope I helped some...
2006-09-14 14:14:22 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
No matter what anyone says: Know that God loves you. He loves you, but he does hate sin--all sin. Women are emotionally connected human beings- more than men. There are plenty of women who find other women attractive, but are not SEXUALLY attracted to them. Have you considered that the right man has not come into your life yet, but he could be on his way. I do not think that people are suppose to feel spiritual connections with everyone that crosses their path. That is what makes true love--true love. Some find it later than others--that's all. If you wait though, you will see that God will bring that very man into your life. He will be perfect for you in every way you want and can imagine. However, you have to want this and trust God.
2006-09-14 21:40:39 · answer #2 · answered by Christa 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm sorry that this is happening to you. First there is nothing wrong with being attracted to the same sex, even though I am only attracted to the opposed sex, your feelings are genuine. Religion is not right all of the time. Our feelings are what drive us and make us who we are. Sometimes we have to be strong and do what feels right in our heart because we have only one life to live and we should be happy in that life. I know it is hard because you don't want to hurt family and friends but it is your life and if two consenting adults have the same feeling toward each other there is not anything whatsoever wrong with it. Even heterosexuals behind closed doors do things that the church would disapprove of, like oral, anal and there are many others too but when we walk out the door we look "normal". My wife is white and I am black and many people believe that is wrong too. Go with your heart and be strong. They will soon come around and get used to it. Soon after you "come out of the closet" they will begin to judge you for you and not your sexual preference. Good luck sweetie.
2006-09-14 21:03:32 · answer #3 · answered by sharkscue 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
sexuality is based on many things.
But you are gay.
enjoy a relationship with a loving, caring woman and see how it makes you feel.
Tell her straight up you're not 'out' yet though.
Once you're part of the gay community you will be surprised to find how many people are just like you, conflicted but in love with their gender and unable to deny it anymore.
It can give you the comfort to find who you really are.
If you never date a woman in a healthy relationship you will never be satisfied in your life, these questions will always drag you down.
Leave your family out of it. You are a grown woman. They don't need to know what's going on in your personal life.
Good Luck
2006-09-14 21:10:42 · answer #4 · answered by trinitybelwoodspark 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What do you feel is your emotional age? 13? 17? 22? 27? This will help us largely with your dilemma.
2006-09-14 21:07:03 · answer #5 · answered by Johnny P 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I DON'T KNOW...PRAY ABOUT IT.
2006-09-14 21:02:35 · answer #6 · answered by CHASE_ME 3 · 0⤊ 2⤋