Holding a fork-arguement with a GF?

Question

I'll just come straight out. "Is there 'Really' a way to hold a fork when cutting meat or any food?" And I mean a universal rule or law that governs the proper way to cut food. I dont mean people 'opinions' on how 'They' think it should be done but rather a form that everyone follows and agrees with. My Gf said that me holding my fork like a dagger is the absolute 'wrong' way to cut my meat and that holding it like a pen is the absolute 'right' way. But she's the first person in my entire life to mention that to me and i know many people who do it the same way. Just a little debate. I argue thats its all cultural and how you are raised. It might not look as 'Eloquent' as holding it like a pen but does it really matter? She feels very strong about it. I'm just trying to prove to her that there really is no 'right' and 'wrong' way of doing it, just that everyone does it different ways. What do you think?

Answer 1

Actually according to my Junior Cotillion class when I was a kid, you are both incorrect.
The fork should be held with the tines pointing away from the hand and your forefinger on the back of the fork. I wish I had a picture to show you.
If you hold it like a pen you don't get enough muscle to actually cut well, and your way is just wrong. Sorry.


Edit: Yes, the way ryfitzan describes it!

Answer 2

I am one of those people who still sets the table correctly. I even know what a shrimp fork is, and where to put it. I am genuinely bothered by restaraunts that make me keep my one and only fork from course to course. That said, I'm here to tell you that the way you hold your knife and fork while cutting meat really IS cultural. Europe and America disagree on this one. I've always been taught the pen method, but which hand to use is up for debate. I have also been taught that flinging your food across the room because you fumbled your flatware from trying to be too proper is the least proper thing of all- so by all means, hold your fork like a dagger if it enables you to neatly eat your food, fer cryin out loud.

Answer 3

Yes, holding is like a dagger is wrong (and tacky). You should hold it in your left hand with the tines pointing down to the plate, holding your food stationary. Your hand should be over the fork, fingers wrapped around, with your index finger just where the handle of the fork starts. Hold the knife in your right hand, cut the meat, and bring the bite up to your mouth (still using your left hand to hold the fork, and still with the tines down). This is the european way. There's also the american way, which involves cutting your food the same way, but putting your knife down and transferring your fork to your right hand. This is too much work. lol

Answer 4

There are two different ways to hold a fork - the European and American way. Europeans hold cutlery with the handle running along the palm and the thumb and index finger to steady it (kind of a like a thumbs-up) - NOT like a pen, which in very proper circles (royalty for instance) is considered very bad manners. They also hold the knife in the right hand and the fork in the left. The fork's prongs should also face down, unless impractical (like eating peas for instance)

The European way is considered more refined and well-mannered; Americans are often considered crass if they come to Europe and eat in the American way.

Answer 5

Holding the fork like a pen is not very manly, you should tell her that.

A real man gets an aggressive vibe on when cutting into meat - this is from the caveman days I think...so a dagger would be an appropriate analogy. Along with a deep scowl and a lot of grunting.

Forget the dainty "pen" thing...I have never heard of that.

But, she is a girl, you are the guy...guess who is always right?

Answer 6

Holding a fork like a dagger makes holding your food in place more difficult when you cut it, etc. At least I would think so. I hold my fork like a pen. It also makes you look like a caveman in restraunts which must embarass your GF.

Anyway, it doesn't matter in the end and if she's not happy tell her to go fork herself.

Answer 7

If the food you are cutting is soft enough, hold it like a pen,but however if you have the " resisting to be gut porkchop or other meat " do what needs to be done--THE DAGGER TECHNIQUE OR CAVE STYLE and PICK IT UP WITH YUOR HANDS. Just don't snort or grunt while eating.

Answer 8

Well you are supposed to hold your fork in your left hand. Index finger on the back near the bottom, and thumb on front near the bottom. then cujt with right hand. My GF gets mad at me to when i hold it with a fist so i know how you feel

Answer 9

just hold it the way you feel most comfortable. i do hold it like a pen, but my bf on the other hand, holds fork in his right hand, and knife in his left, which is contrary to this whole "etiquette thing". and i don't care, as long as he is comfortable with it.

Answer 10

There are some arguments not worth
1) winning
2) making a mountain out of a molehill
3) expending any energy on
4) all of the above

Pick one.