If a parent has visitation, can they send another relative to pick the kid up? It is not in the agreement.?

Question

The child would has to stay with the relative until midnight. The dad works every Friday night. It's not a once in a while thing.

Mom does not agree. The kid is uncomfortable there & doesn't want to go. But her mom makes her because it's court ordered & she can't afford a lawyer to go back to court. The kid calls her mom every Friday night crying.

Answer 1

It probably depends on the state. But if the father has visitation and he's not going to be there, I don't think they can force the child to have visits with another relative. Call a lawyer or look up you states laws like, "maine.gov"

Answer 2

It shouldn't make a difference if someone picks up the child for visitation other than the parent as long as it is agreed upon and discussed first just in case anything happens it would be the responsible and considerate thing to do.

On dads visitation days, he has the authority on who he want to pick the child up as long as it is known to the other parent in advance to make sure the dad has authorized this person to pick the child up, I think this isn't violating the agreement unless it is written in a way that makes it mandatory that the parent pick the child up.

Now if the dad works late, he might have to ask that the agreement be changed to his hours of working on Friday so that he picks the child up which might be a inconvenience to the other parent but if the other parent doesn't make a fuss it shouldn't be no problem.

Answer 3

Legally, you are correct. However, I've seen this type of thing in court, and I've seen the judge acknowledge the problem - then disregard it as if it didn't matter.

The moral of the story is, court is illogical. Sometimes it makes sense, other times it will leave you wondering why the judge smoked crack before he came to work.

You can probably go after the other parent for violating the agreement, but what the judge will decide is anyone's guess. Now that I think about it, I think you SHOULD go after him for violating the agreement, that way there's a record of it. By just letting him do it without raising the issue, you automatically "agree" to it in the court's eyes. I've seen that happen too.

Answer 4

If it is the grandparents of the child, that would be the closest relative I would let pick up my child. Or make arrangements for the father to pick up the child on Saturday.
My ex-husband tried sending his wife over to pick up his son one time. I had my son get in my car, I was so mad. I drove over to their house. I found him just sitting on the porch doing nothing. This is what I said, (add a few bad words in here now and then), "you are his father, and take the responsibility to pick up your own son. Do not ever send anyone, not even your brother to pick your son up. Either be a father and do what you are suppose to do for your son as a dad or get lost. If you want to be a father, act like one."

Answer 5

I dont see anything wrong with that as long as both parties agree that the person is responsible, they are the parents of that child reguardless of splitting they should both be involved with the decision... but as long as the dad and mom both have nothing against the relative watching them for a few hours then I dont see why not...

Answer 6

During the non-custodial parent's scheduled visitation time they are considered to have all say in who the child stays with - just as you dont have to check with him everytime you get a sitter.
Unless you feel this person is unsafe or a risk to the child you have no say in the courts about it.

Answer 7

Its really all up to you I guess. The thing about divorce or parents sharing custodial rights is that one cannot dictate whatthe other does with the child as long as it is not unhealthy or disruptive to the child. If the relative is someone you know and the child trusts than what is the harm?

Answer 8

Sure- just let the other parent know that so and so will be dropping them off for you since u either have to work or have an appointment. Or let him know ahead of time on the fone that this will be happenning. Im sure he will just be glad to spend time with his child- no matter who brings the child to him! Good luck!

Answer 9

Does it say in the agreement that he has to pick up the kid personally?

Be careful how you treat him, you may get stuck someday in a situation that you will need help with, he will remember all the trouble you cause him.

Answer 10

Why dont you ask him to pick up the child Sat morn. My daughter lives with her dad and she is do busy i usually cant pick her up til 11 friday night so i tell her to just wait til morn.