I met a great guy who is not at all like other guys I dated. He is younger, very respectable. single dad of a 3yr old , nice , and we talk for hours on the phone we have alot on comon. Im also a single mom hes not the thuggish type Im use too and I dont know how to deal with him . I feel hes a real man and im afraid to open up and let him in. This is scary!Help what shouid I do?? Am I passin up a good thing?
2006-09-14 02:31:08 · 26 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Give him a chance! Maybe he'll turn out to be a great guy. It's always scary to leave your comfort zone (even if the comfort zone was dating jerks, at least it was familiar! "thugs you were used to"...as opposed to a nice guy that you're not used to). I'm dating a guy now that's wonderful & it scares me to death because he could actually be "the one". At least when I dated guys with problems I could always see a way out, they were destined to fail. There was a certain safety in that. Maybe we fear commitment. So when we find a great guy that doesn't give us an excuse to leave him, we think, "Uh oh! I could actually have a long-term healthy relationship! I've never had that before! Wouldn't know what to do with it!"
Good luck. Don't pass up a good thing. You deserve to be happy!
2006-09-14 02:48:06 · answer #1 · answered by amp 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Dr. Phil needs a hotline (lol) he would get you thinking rational - like "is the thuggish type working for you? If the answer is no, then maybe you need a change!
Continue to communicate with him to get to know each other and little by little let the relationship develop. And do not pour your heart out to paint yourself in a negative light. There is such a thing as too much information. So give yourself a chance for a new start by looking up with positive thinking and expectations - as all relationships must be balanced and interesting to be maintained .He must feel that he's getting a prize - not the left-overs from her love of allowing herself to be abused.
2006-09-14 02:42:30 · answer #2 · answered by worriedaboutyou 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, you would be passing up a good thing. The first thing you have to do is get over yourself the old way of thinking you can't do things the way you used to do in the other relationships (with the thugs) this is a whole new thing something different,scary of course but it the good kind of scary.From what it sounds like you
have been wanting something different your tired of the average and want something new and better with the same mentality and on the same level as you. So take it slow don't make decisions by how you feel (your emotions) base you decisions on the facts and what you truly want in you heart and this will be awesome. Good Luck and enjoy every moment!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
2006-09-14 02:47:46 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why dont you just start slowly. Get to know him. Talk to him, hang out with him. Sometimes when you are use to a certain "type" you do not keep an open mind about meeting new types of people.
I was the same way. I was always looking for a certain "type" of guy after I got seperated, but then I found somebody who I usually wouldn't be interested in. I got to know him and boy it was the best choice of my life. I am so happy now, and much more open minded.
Give the guy a chance. At your own pace and maybe he will be your "type" after all.
2006-09-14 02:36:11 · answer #4 · answered by jam_psb 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Dont pass him up cause it does sound like a good thing. Thuggish is not always the way to pick them. If you like him, yall get along, and you have good conversation, then it seems that you already know what to do with him. And I really dont understand you when you say that. Treat him right like he treats you, thats what you should do to him. You are already having hours of conversatio so thats a start to opening up to him. If you pass this up you will be falling into that stereotype that women dont want a man that is good to them. Dont be scared, its not like he's mistreating you.
2006-09-14 02:45:11 · answer #5 · answered by superbad~honeydip 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you can open up to a thuggish type dude but freak out with a guy like this????
do be afaid of change girl...it might do you some good?
your used to the game players and now your at a lost for words.....men like that want you to just be yourself.....if you had gotten anywhere with the types you were dating b4 you would still be with them......theres a good man for every woman...and this one might be it..might be
2006-09-14 02:38:53 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You might be. Keep on checking him out. You are used to a certain type of man, one you find predictable. Now he is not that type, or seems not to be and it is weird cuz you cannot figure him out as well. Maybe you are scared he will turn into one of the monsters you used to know? Good luck and god bless.
2006-09-14 02:34:33 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If this man is all you say he is , with all due respect, don't be stupid. I was just like you if a guy didn't treat me like crap i didn't know how to act. My advice is to take it slow and ease yourself into a healthy relationship. If this man is good to your child and you, you have the makings of something great. You as a woman deserve the best, be good to him and see where it goes.
2006-09-14 02:37:40 · answer #8 · answered by jennise77 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he's a great guy, then stop limiting yourself to what your 'used' to and force yourself to try something new. Go out on a limb and just be yourself. I mean, if he's not there to be your friend, then he's not worth the time...but ya know...you can't live your life in a shelter affraid to open up to people who love you. It just creates drama in the long run.
2006-09-14 02:33:56 · answer #9 · answered by detroitkid17 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
exciting tale. many years in the past when I were given married. My mom informed before my wedding ceremony that I might want to set up a secret monetary business organization account in her call. An account that my destiny spouse might want to recognize not something about. imagine about that, my mom informed me to attempt this. Why? because she knew how females were. Edit: for the record, I under no circumstances did as she suggested. So take those 2 thumbs down and shove them up your a-ss
2016-11-26 22:52:08 · answer #10 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋