serious advice needed?

Question

my daughter is 6 yrs old and she will eat supper and start coughing (on purpose) and end up throwing up. when she was about 6 months old she used to stick her fingers down her throat until she puked. she quit doing it for awhile when i would take her finger out of her mouth, she quit doing it when she was probably about 3. and now it has started back up again or maybe she was hiding it from me. she is a very little girl and can't afford to lose much more weight from this and i don't know y she does it.
i have talked to her doctor about it in the past and she said some kids like the feeling of throwing up.
but i really cannot accept this as an answer especially when i know the long-term affects of her doing it.

now what i want to know is how can i make her stop?
or is this a deeper problem?

Answer 1

That is a problem. Let her know you are not going to stand for that anymore. Tell her every time she does it you will take away something of hers. Be consistent. If she makes it through a meal w/o doing that then praise her. Children want to please by nature. You will have to get creative with the repercussions of her actions, but don't stay, and w/in a few weeks she will stop.

Answer 2

I think the problem is probably what the doctor has described; she discovered the feeling and her brain has learned to enjoy it. However the behaviour is unacceptable to you, as it should be, and should be dealt with in the same way as any other unacceptable behaviour is. What I would not do is associate the type of discipline with food, for example insisting that she eat another meal after she throws up. Send her to her room or to bed early or take away a valued toy. What you need to do, chiefly, is to work on how you feel about this, “can't afford to lose much more weight” “i really cannot accept this as an answer” “i know the long-term affects of her doing it” “is this a deeper problem?” are all pretty serious words for what may really be a gross, odd, but otherwise minimal problem. You need to speak to another doctor, a paediatrician, and you need to get a proper child growth tracking chart to see if she is below the 5th percentile of development, and you need to compare this against family members with the advice of the paediatrician if he deems it important.

Answer 3

Wow. I don't really feeling knowledgeable enough about this to offer much, but since the doctor apparently thinks some kids like the feeling of throwing up he/she probably knows something we don't. (Kids do do stupid stuff of one type of another.)

It isn't for me to have an opinion about whether its a deeper problem or not, and I know how concerned you must be (rightfully).

I was wondering, though, what if you start doing this for a couple of weeks (if you haven't already tried this): As soon as she's finished with dinner take her out for a walk or take her out for a trip to some convenience store or else have her go into the kitchen with you and maybe help put dishes in the dishwasher (or something like that). Just make up your mind that after dinner she's going to be with you for, say, two hours straight (at least for a period of a week or two or three). Tell her why too. Tell her she can't be doing that or she won't get the nutrition from her dinner, and she won't grow and will get sick; and that you are going to keep her with you after dinner until she stops.

Either she'll stop or she'll have to be with you after dinner. Don't treat it like its a punishment. Just tell her, "I'm not angry. I'm worried. We are going to stop this thing that you do, and we can enjoy some time together as well." I would think you need to stay calm and not make the situation seem like its a big, giant, problem or crisis; but it should be possible to have a few rules about who goes where after dinner without doing that. Be upbeat about the new plan. Just say, "I think this is going to be a very nice way to help you stop that habit of yours."

I'd think if its just a stupid thing she's in the habit of doing a plan like the one above may break up the pattern and get her involved in other things after dinner. (She's only six. Go into the bathroom with her if she goes in. Tell her until you know she's not doing that you'll be in there watching.)

On the other hand, if this is a deeper problem there's a chance the above type of habit-breaking activities probably wouldn't work.

It may be worth a try for a few weeks, and then another few weeks of watching, and then a visit to someone for professional help if it seems necessary.

One other thing: Is there any chance that pointing out to her how unfeminine or repulsive such behavior is that it would appeal to the " princess" in her and make her stop on her own? Or what about telling her how if, by any chance, she hasn't washed her hands extremely well there's the chance that she could infect her intestines with worms by putting her finger in her mouth? If not worms, then what about strep throat? Its not a lie to tell her that if she gets bacteria in her throat by putting her hands in her mouth she could get sick.

Answer 4

I don't think the Dr was taking this seriously enough. Even if 'kids like throwing up' it can have other effects - it is no good for your esophagus and stuff. If you cant change this problem at home with different techniques then would definitely take it further and have her evaluated for other problems. Don't panic, I am sure the right person or child psychologist can help you change your daughters habits - this may be all it is - you know for attention etc. - good luck

Answer 5

Get a second opinion, I can't think of one child I have met that likes throwing up. Truly, take the kid to see another doctor. Another thing, try talking top her about it. Find out why she does it, if she's 6 years old, surely she can answer you. And yes, you might find it advisable to seek psychiatric help for her if it isn't something physical. But try talking to her, try finding out why she does it. That would be a good start.

Answer 6

I would recommend to seek serious advice from a Doctor. Throwing up so often will definitely harm seriously her esofagus (sorry 4 the spelling). In the meantime, talk to her and try to make her understand that what she is doing is bad and would hurt her badly. Another idea, next time she throws up, make sure some of her best friends see her and perhaps their reaction to her act make her change. Good Luck.

Answer 7

My daughter did this for like a month. I told her i wasn't going to stand for this she would end up in the hospital and have to stay there cause it would make her really sick. I would NEVER make her do it. but a i did threaten her if she threw it up i would make her eat it again so she better just leave it in there. She never did it again. If something like that doesn't work she might just be trying to get attention take her in to a councilor something else might be going on. Best of Luck

Answer 8

I don't mean to alarm you, but my wife did this when she was little because she had been sexually abused. She had a lot of other signs though, too. If she has a lot of other problems and you suspect it, it would be worth considering. If it's an isolated problem, maybe she just needs a little treat for not doing it. Hope everything works out O.K.

Answer 9

It could be deeper. If she spends time with any family members or friends she could have picked it up from there. But you should ask her to tell you where she learned this from and why she is doing it and don't be mad at her just talk calmly and let her know that mommy won't be mad if she explains to you. Just keep reassuring her that you won't be mad, but that you are concerned about it.

Answer 10

Get a second opinion and a new doctor! It should not be brushed off so easily. It could cause serious health problems and it's bad habit.