my nephew has just experienced the first death of a person he is close to his uncle they use to play all the time and fight. my nephew is 5 and currently sick himself. i want to know if you guys think it is a good ideal to take him to the funeral.
2006-09-13 16:44:00 · 9 answers · asked by Water's Away 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
As long as nobody tells him that his uncle has gone to sleep, but instead perhaps that God has important work for him to do now so has called for the uncle to come home.
Sometimes, if a young child is told that the deceased has gone to sleep, they become afraid to go to sleep themselves which just creates more problems than the family already has, dealing with the loss of a loved one.
A private moment, perhaps before everyone else gets to the funeral, to say goodbye to his beloved uncle would help him deal with his loss better, but personally, I would skip taking him to the cemetery after. That is something no child should have to see. If asked, try to explain that he's gone on to a better pace where he won't be sick anymore, but will always be watching over him.
My condolences to you and your family.
2006-09-14 01:20:51 · answer #1 · answered by Laurie K 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Yes, the boy should go to the funeral. Otherwise the death of his uncle won't be real to him. He may not understand it completely now but he will. It's never a good idea to hide death from a kid, even if the kid is sick himself. It's a natural, if scary, part of life.
There are lots of good books to help a boy deal with sickness and death. You are in that position to help him.
Good luck!
2006-09-13 16:47:51 · answer #2 · answered by Hello Dolly 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
A funeral is a good idea for closure especially if they were close. Just explaining to him that his uncle is no longer with him will not be enough. He may feel his uncle has just gone on a vacation or something. I think if he is well enough to go you or his parent should take him.
2006-09-13 16:53:23 · answer #3 · answered by val h 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It's probably not a good idea. What do his parents think?
I think it's best a child attends a funeral for an acquaintance first, and then loved ones. I don't think it will harm him either way, unless he has strong feelings himself, like he will be sad if he doesn't get to go. Has anyone asked him?
2006-09-14 06:02:12 · answer #4 · answered by steelypen 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This really depends on the child and whether or not his parents think he can handle it. My middle daughter was 4 when my father died and I wanted her to have the chance to say goodbye but I didn't feel she could handle the funeral and all the tears so we took her to the funeral home before visitation started so it was just us and her and let her see papa and know that he was sleeping forever and say goodbye in her own way. Sorry about your loss.
2006-09-13 16:47:58 · answer #5 · answered by Martha S 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think 5 is a little young to go to a funeral. They don't understand death and why everyone is so sad. My son was 5 when his grandma died (my mom). He stayed with friends.
2006-09-13 16:49:39 · answer #6 · answered by katie 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
theres an age that children are ready to deal with that kinda stuff. it might hurt him emotionally to see his uncle in a casket and know that hes gonna be buried in the ground and that he will never see him again. i didnt go to my own grandfathers funeral bc i could bare with it. but i think that he may not be ready for that situation unless u have a conversation that hes ready for this.
2006-09-13 17:31:50 · answer #7 · answered by CrystalRose 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't think it's a good idea, on the other hand it might make him understand what death is and that his uncle is deceased.
2006-09-13 16:47:27 · answer #8 · answered by Backwoods Barbie 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Its a hard thing for a child to deal with the best i can say is if he does go if its an open casket dont let him go...Everntually he is going to have to deal with death though
2006-09-13 16:51:55 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋