Get to know him?

Question

Long story; if you don't read it all you won't get it, so if ya don't don't answer! :)
Ok, I told my best friend that I liked this one guy. So the next day she askes him out for me! She told me what he said and she said he said "I don't know I don't really know her that well." So she starts walking over to me and he follows with one of his friends and he waved and said Hi but that was it and I said Hi and walked away. He's a really quiet person. I don't know A THING about him! Next time I see him, what do I say? How do I get him to open up? How can I get to know him?

Answer 1

well, i would think that you both need to know each other well before anything can happen between the two of you. try being a friend to him. this enables you to open up to him more and he would also open up to you too. im sort of in the same situation as you myself except im more of the quiet one. we've only seen each other twice and already i know a lot about him just by being a friend to him. whats better is that the more we spend time together and talk, the more he likes me. he told me the second time i saw him how much fun he has when im around and how much he wished i came to his birthday, saying that he's birthday was good but what would have made it better was me being there. i really wanted to smile when he said that. and when we had seen each other earlier that day, i said hi to him and stood there next to him and he asked me how i was, and then at dinner i started a conversation with him after the others went to get another plate of food and asked him how he was and then asked him what he had been doing lately and it went from there. he got to find out a bit more about me and i also got to find out a bit more about him. next time i see him, im planning to give him my number so that we'd be able to talk more. at the end of the day, as long as you get a conversation going and make sure that there is no awkward silence between you two and you'd feel more comfortable around each other. what would probably make him more comfortable around you though is by not having other people around you, just being you and him. and after getting to know each other a bit after spending one on one with him, he will want to go out with you.

Answer 2

The best way, in fact, the only way, to get to know someone is to talk to him. Look at it this way - everybody wants to feel interesting, so he'll probably be receptive if you show an interest in him.

What to say, well, start with "hi" and ask him about something you have in common - like a class, teacher, or homework assignment. If he's wearing a t-shirt with a logo on it, ask him about it - what it's about, or if it's a band, what his favorite song is by that band. Anything you know or notice about him is fair game for conversation, so long as you LISTEN to the answers.

If he has an MP3 player, ask him to show you what tracks he has loaded on it. If he's carrying a skateboard, ask him how long he's been skating and what his favorite tricks are. Give him time to answer, listen to what he says. What he says will give you openings to ask another question, or tell him something about you.

Start small - especially since he's the quiet type - and build from there. Short chats, then longer ones (look for body language that he's uncomfortable, like looking away, or stepping back).

You say you don't know a thing about him, so this is your chance. You might find that he's not all that fascinating once you know more - or you might find out that you have a lot to talk about. Worst-case scenario, you discover he doesn't interest you that much once you get to know him. Probably, though, you'll at least make a new friend, maybe more. Good luck!

Answer 3

I'm going to answer this question wih a question...

What is it that you like about this guy? Do you know of any common interests?

If you know of common interests, then just start up a conversation about that when you see him sometime. I'm certain that he'll open up.

If you just like his looks, maybe you can at least start with something more than "Hi," by complimenting him on what he's wearing. Say you like his shirt, or that it really brings out his eye color. At least you're at a stage where you're making an effort to communicate.

Once you've gotten to that stage, then maybe you can have some introductions, if you don't know anything that you have in common. Just something like introducing yourself, and if he's still quiet, say something like, "I see you around all the time, but I still don't know much about you," or "...but we never have a chance to talk." Followed with, "So, what (sports/books/etc) do you enjoy. Or ask which are his favorite classes or how his classes are going.

If he made the next step to walk over and say hi, I'm sure he'd have some interest if he got to know you.

Good luck!

Answer 4

As a shy person, it is difficult to open up to people because I am unsure of how they perceive me and why they are talking to me. The first thing I would do to get a shy person to open up would be to get them alone or in a situation where they don't have to worry about what other people think. This could be a walk in the park, etc. Somewhere they are comfortable and not worried about everyone around them.

Take it slow, open up to them, show your interest. Don't talk endlessly, give him chances to answer and talk in his turn, but don't get uncomfortable or embarrassed if there is a silence. Just let it be for a minute and then ask a question or make a comment. Don't act like he has to do something to satisfy you. You are trying to convey that you enjoy his company and that you want to get to know him as a person, and that if something comes up he might not be certain about telling someone, that you aren't going to force it, or worse, tell all over school when he does tell you.

Keep it simple, make sure that you aren't going to put him in a box like he is expecting, and even show some attention to his friends.

Good luck, and be patient.

Answer 5

well what u dont wanna do is make a big scene or make a big deal because that might scare him off so try to catch him comin into school or leaving or alone in a hallway and just ask him if hes heard anything about some of the music u like or a teacher everyone hates that he has ask him what went on just find things u have in common

Answer 6

Well, I find that if you don't talk to a guy they soon give up and forget about ya ( trust me , the whole play hard to get thing doesn't work if he doesn't know you ) what you need to do is talk to him, laugh, make statements, and show him who you are .I find when guys know you better they start to wanna be around you and like you. Trust me you need to talk to him, find something you both agree on and talk about.( and jokes are a big part of male lives) so always laugh at their jokes.
Now you guys won't agree on everything but don't worry no one does. But don't hang out to much or he will just get sick of you!!

Answer 7

You should say hi, and start a conversation. Show that you really are into him and that you would like to get to know him too. Maybe you should've became friends with before you told you're friend to do that.

Answer 8

um... i feel 4 ya' im a guy so listen closely... ur friend kinda screwed up... she shouldn't have dont that cuz she made a move too fast... but thats alright....

neways, yest get to know him first.. talk to him, talk to his friends, c if he has a myspace... normally, us guys put stufff on there bout us... um, sit with him during lunch sometimes and just hang out

lets c, what else? oh, always smile... smiles turn us on... we just love any girl that smiles at us and talks openly

oh yeah, wave too...

let me know how things work out

-mike-

Answer 9

Just start talking to him like you've known him for a very long time. if he's shy, this should help relax a little.

Answer 10

Find something that he likes that you can carry a convo about and he should open up easily.