Why are men so intimidated by successful women?

Question

ok, so i've had long term relationships but now i find myself single but doing very well in my career - mainly due to hard work and a bit of luck! Every man i have met has said they find it refreshing to be with an intelligent female yet when it comes down to it the fact that i am career minded and doing well really seems to put the a spanner in the works. its not like i don't want to have a family and i do the career thing because i'd like to be able to work freelance when i have children...but what is this with the whole men 'want' to be with an intelligent female but at the end of the day have a big problem with it????

in reply to what yard stick i measure my intelligence - i am known nationally in my field and so consider my chosen career path to be a success, i don't earn megab ucks but am certainly comfortable and do want to have a family at some point in the not too distant...hence comment about working freelance and i mean that as in working from home as i would like my children to be brought up by me and my partner and not a nanny!

Answer 1

Real men would never be intimidated by a successful woman. A real man would be inspired by a successful woman. Its because the men that you say are men are not men, they are boys. They haven't grown up. Men and boys are different. Women say all men are the same, they are not, all boys are the same, all men are different. Boys will be boys, and men will be men, can you tell the difference, trust me, when you meet a man, you will know the difference. If everthing is the same as before, but just a different face, then it must be a boy. Real men are few and far between. Hope this helps.

Answer 2

I'm not turned off women who show success, but I may be turned off by the cost they incur in achieving it. It's great that you make all sorts of advances in your field, but any relationship you cultivate with someone is going to grow from the how you use your free time with them. Many career-minded women will end up spending a lot of time doing their work. Some do this by choice, whereas others tacitly accept more work when it is pushed upon them. I have observed that some successful women sacrifice three things in the name of career. The first sacrifice is free time. When they are overworked, the amount of leisure time they have that could support a relationship begins to shrink. The next sacrifice is the amount of energy they will have during the few time slots they have available. Dating will take a lot of energy and if you're tired it will limit your options. Finally, when the woman loses her free time and loses her energy, her loss of of varied interests isn't usually far behind. Because after all, if she doesn't have time or energy, she's going to show less interest in doing new things. And after these three sacrifices, you have the female workaholic, which is just as unappealing as the male workaholic has been to women throughout the ages. This is what may turn me off a successful woman. The other thing to consider is that it is far more important in attraction for the partner to feel special than useful. Being a successful intelligent woman is a useful aspect that is valuable in any long term relationship. But your ability to make the guy feel special will be more important. One major way of making the guy feel special is if you convey that you need him. Most people find the idea of a strong motivated intelligent independent type appealing but this stereotype neglects one vital aspect of initial attraction: if you're that independent, do you really need anyone? Or will you perceive him as a fleeting want of convenience that is scheduled around your work schedule? None of these problems are gender specific but I think as women continue to gain greater recognition in the work place, they are beginning to perceive the same problems faced by career-driven men.

Answer 3

Presumably you only have serious relationships with men of similar financial status to yourself. Assuming that the gentleman's income is quite capable of supporting two adults plus children, your career becomes a liability. A potential husband would foresee the following areas of possible trouble:
1. After having children, you decide that motherhood is a little tedious and wish to have the children cared for by a nanny so that you can return to full time work.
2. Worse, you suggest that your career offers the best prospect and Hubby should stay at home and look after the children.

A bright lady with a lower income earning potential is an altogether more attractive candidate for the role of wife and mother.

Sadly, I am unable to make any suggestions that will ease your predicament.

Answer 4

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Men Have A Fundamental And Genetic Need To Feel Superior To The Women They Are Involved With.

If You Try To Overcome That, Your In For Trouble. It Is Not Something That Can Or Should Be Overcome.

It's A Basic Intregal Part Of Being A Man And A Man Functioning Properly In The World

HOPE THIS HELPS

♣♥♠♦ ♦♠♥♣ ♣♥♠♦ ♦♠♥♣ ♣♥♠♦ ♦♠♥♣ ♣♥

Answer 5

Maybe you are not looking for the right man. Some are intimidated by women who would make more and have a better career. I wouldn't be, i wouldn't mind being the support and doing the crap job while she makes the big bucks. Love is love and as long as two people get what they want out of the relationship it don't matter who makes more or has the better job.

Answer 6

Apparently the men you date have a problem with women being successful and earning a good living. Or do you seem too career minded to them when they are looking to settle down? Many women have successful careers, marriage and children. Keep looking. The right one will come along.

Answer 7

I guess a lot of guys are just a bit intimidated - society expects men to be either the higher or sole earner in relationships and some men might be a bit put out by your success!
At the end of the day - if you meet the right guy, your job status and earning shouldnt suppress his feelings towards u - and well lets face it if it does - hes obviously a jerk.

Answer 8

Maybe you have put so much into your career that you have little time and energy left for a relationship. That is the first thing I would be wary of with a career woman.

Also a guy might feel at ease around you but being around your friends and family could really suck if they consider him lower caste. Been there.

Answer 9

you hit it career minded
That means not family oreiented.
So you are cool to go out with and lay but not to marry because they figure you wont be around to be a mom
your career is your life.

Which is true. Now if you make it clear you want to be a mom, someone might bite.

Yes an intelligent woman is sexy
But an independent woman is a nusiance. What need is there for the man...you get me?

Answer 10

It's all about priorities. Could it be that your priorities have nothing to do with what a man looks for in a wife? If you met the right guy, I bet your priorities would change, not that you couldn't still be a successful career-minded woman, just the order would change. Personally, I love those business skirts, sexy and powerful. Hoorah!!!