My sister, who is five years younger than me, just came home from school crying because she doesnt have any friends. She says they all turned against her, and ignore her like she doesn't exist (I'm using different words than she would because she's only in 2nd grade.) She's now filled with self-loathing that has turned her into a non-stop crying freak! She likes her friends and even made a new one the other day, one that had the same name as her, and they all turned against her. I've told her everything I could think of but she won't listen. Do you have any suggestions? (Remember, she's only 7!)
By the way, if any of you try to give me shhit to tell her or say something mean, I swear I'll f*cking rip you apart! Tha tmeans don't say anything like, oh she's just a brat... you know, shhit like that.
And one last thing, she's really smart, pretty for her age, and she's polite, nice and very caring about everyone and anyone around her. So help a sister out!
2006-09-13 09:46:23 · 21 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
What I mean by all her friends turned against her is that (being 2nd graders) they all like paired up and left her out of the mix. She just is crying her way back into the groups without them seeing, she's always been nice but they just left her out for some reason.
Should I talk to the twerps?
2006-09-13 09:53:21 · update #1
What I mean by all her friends turned against her is that (being 2nd graders) they all like paired up and left her out of the mix. She just is crying her way back into the groups without them seeing, she's always been nice but they just left her out for some reason.
Should I talk to the twerps?
2006-09-13 09:53:39 · update #2
I remember going through the same thing when I was a little girl, don't you? Try to spend some time with her and let her know that no matter how many problems she has in school or with her friends, she always has a great big sister to lean on! Remind her how smart, pretty, polite and caring you think she is! Let her know that kids can be cruel and how they act may not have anything to do with her! Tell her to stay strong and be brave and everything will work out for her. Good luck with your little sister!
2006-09-13 10:02:39 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your sister has been the target of jealousy. My daughters go through this very same thing because they are to smart for their friends to keep up. The friends then do the only thing they can, lash out or ignore the person that is to smart or pretty. The friends may not even be aware of their actions or the reason for the change towards your sister. My daughter was deliberately missing school or not turning in home work so she would be accepted as one of the cool kids. For about 3 months I had no idea what to do to help her. Finally I got her interested in making robots and designing computer programs to make them run the way she wants. In doing this she met other very smart children and made new friends who like and support her intelligence. My other daughter started martial arts classes and once again found new supporting friends. Once they were happy then they made new friends at school who appreciate them. Now they don't even think about the mean friends. My eldest daughter is 8 and the youngest 5. My suggestion is find something they are interested in and help them meet new people.
2006-09-13 09:59:11 · answer #2 · answered by Archmage 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I went through the same stuff as a kid. And I had 2 sisters that helped me just like you're trying to do for your sis. So, you rock!! :)
"she's really smart, pretty for her age, and she's polite, nice and very caring about everyone and anyone around her"
Tell her that, and that you love her and you'll always be her friend. Tell her you understand and that kids can be mean and that you're sorry they're being mean to her and even though it may not feel like it, everything will be ok. The most important thing to say is that you want to be her friend and you want to be her best friend and soon she'll find some kids her own age that also think she's pretty smart and polite but to never forget that you'll always be there for her. Even when she finds new friends, she can always count on you. Just be there for her, hug her and let her cry and continue to tell her that it's going to be ok. And encourage your mom to let a kid she likes come over and spend the night and you play with them and encourage their friendship.
2006-09-13 09:54:54 · answer #3 · answered by justjerra_2000 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Let her know people have issues... even kids her own age. She needs to continue to be sweet and kind and caring. Also, if she allows the other kids to "yank her chain" she is allowing them to control her. They could be jealous of her, or just plain old insecure and have a nasty attitude, because they are not loved very much at home, or have a sister who loves them the way she does.
She will attract nicer kids in the future, but if she allows this to continue to upset her then she will continue to be unhappy and unpleasant to be around. Let her know it's not her fault, and obviously kids like that don't deserve her friendship, so tell her don't sweat them... they are certainly not worth it. Also, tell her to pray for them and don't try to worry about being friends with kids like that. She should not be mean to them... but just quietly move on and continue being sweet.
2006-09-13 10:09:39 · answer #4 · answered by 247 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
yipes!! little girls can be REALLY mean.. =T and it sounds to me like they might be jealous of ur sis?? i think u can't really do much to change the kids..but u can try to help ur SIS change her attitude, about herself, about others....
first, i would listen and try to understand how she feels (when u say stuff like "those kids are stupid, u are great" she won't believe u cuz they are being mean to her, and they are her peers, and she WANTS them to like her)... so just listening kind of reinforces that her feelings are somewhat "correct", that she's not crazy, that there's not something wrong w/ the way she's feeling. having said this, obviously she is having problems about her Confidence.
my suggests would be to focus on Family relationships w/ her... encourage others to have a lot of contact w/ her; conversations, doing things together, family activities... so that she knows that YOU guys love her, no matter what. next, i would encourage her to bring friends over if possible, so that they are not in a school environment where someone is trying to make everyone hate her. if no one at school likes her at the moment, u might want to enroll her in some other activities such as soccer or art class, and make new friends. i think ur Last resort is to move her to another school btw... =T.
hmm..what a dilemma. has she explained why they turned against her? is there anything she could've done to bring it on? either she did something (on accident or on purpose), or the kids are just picking someone to be mean to, she is innocent. maybe u can encourage her to learn, study, and focus on her teachers and people in her class One on One. but remember, peers are extremely important at that age, so if she is miserable for a long period of time, u may need to move her to another school. good luck!!!
2006-09-13 09:53:42 · answer #5 · answered by sasmallworld 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
im sry ur sister has 2 go thru that.did she give a reason 4 this? just tell her GOD is her friend ALWAYS no matter what. i know it sounds corny, but at least she ll know she has the most important friend there is. mayb let her hva a sleepover. i m pretty sure she s exaagerating a lil bit. also, mayb call the moms of these girls 2 find out more. tell her she has a friend in me, & i dont even know her! if shes pretty & smart it wont take her long 2 find new friends. good luck & GOD BLESS & GIUDE U.
2006-09-13 09:53:23 · answer #6 · answered by big foot 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
leave her alone for a while. she is nervous right now. from another point of view consider that you only know her part of the story. maybe there is more. maybe she argued with somebody or something. after the critical moment you can try to play something with her and not necessarily talk with her about the incident. you don't have to remind her anything. you can try to tell her nice stories about you and your friends when you were younger and remind her gently that if she continues to be nice and happy friends will come by thair own.
sorry for my english i hope u understood something.
2006-09-13 09:56:59 · answer #7 · answered by greengrin 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell her something to the effect of this:
"Time heals all wounds. You are so young and pretty that you will be making friends again in no time! Don't let the words of your ex-friends bog you down. Who knows, maybe one day they will recognize their mistake - and ask you for forgiveness! They may not even remember why they broke up with you tommorrow."
And from me say:
"Some guy that answered my question on Yahoo! Answers sends you great luck!"
2006-09-13 09:52:07 · answer #8 · answered by Oklahoman 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think what you have to do is find out what happened from someone like a teacher. Maybe its just a misunderstanding somehow. I know at that age can be very mean . The best way to help your sister is to first know all the facts then you will know the best way to help her.
2006-09-13 09:50:39 · answer #9 · answered by melthule 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She needs knew friends. Friends like hers at school don't deserve her to be their friends. Also you have to realize that being in school is hard even at a young age. Also maybe get your parents to call the teacher or principle.
2006-09-13 09:56:40 · answer #10 · answered by iseestupidpeopleeverywhere 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋