Have I been dumped and just don't know it?

Question

I have been seeing a guy for about 4 months. Everything has been great. We get along, we have fun together, I get along with his friends, etc. About a week ago he agrees to meet my family and then all of a suddent stops answering my calls. I finally got him to return a call the other day after leaving two messages and he apologized for not being able to go out to dinner said he would call the next day. He didn't and its now four days later. He's supposed to meet my family in two weeks. Is he trying to break up with me without telling me before that happens?

Answer 1

Sorry to say, but somethings not right. He is definitely avoiding you. Stop calling him, and let him call you. This is very hard, but this is something you are going to have to do and give yourself some back bone. Men just walk away, and don't care, but us females wear our hearts on our sleeves. The decent thing for him to do was not leave you hanging and confused, but some men just don't have back bone themselves. Act like you don't care, and he will start wondering where you are. If not you must move on, and find someone who will respect you alittle more than that. Just think about this, would you want to marry someone who may not show up to the wedding? I wish you the best and I hoped this helped. Goodluck!

Answer 2

Maybe he feels that you are trying to push him into something he doesn't want. Meeting parents to a guy is like (OK she's thinking marriage) You probally just want your parents to meet the man in your life. If he's stopped calling he is trying to tell you he's not ready for that next stop. Tell him that you are just trying to introduce him as a friend and a man in your life, no strings attached.
If he doesn't respond he is telling you it's over. It's a cowards way out but that's what it seems like. Don't call him let him call you if he is really interested he will get back to you. If you must call because you feel that it needs to be handled let him know there is no pressure put on him and you or your family are not planning a wedding any time soon. try to keep it light so he can respond favorably.

Answer 3

Maybe you should give him a break, he's probably so nervous about meeting your family this is his way of trying to rub it off...although what he's doing is kind of immature you should leave him a message and ask him to give you a call back or meet some place comfortable and talk about it...and if he doesn't return your calls then he's taking this a little bit too far...if he's really just nervous or if he's not ready to meet your family...all he has to do is tell you and be honest instead of hiding...So give him some time but not too much time...maybe this guy may be a little too immature for you then....

Answer 4

yeah, i like humanresource's answer, just go with a direct approach. anything else at this point just seems really needy--calling and leaving a lot of answering machine messages, etc. better yet, don't call at all and make him call you. sometimes people are driven away by neediness. just don't call him and assume it's a break up. if he calls you and apologizes all over the place because something came up at work, then CONSIDER taking him back. but otherwise, consider yourself happily rid of him since he's not able to handle a relationship with a real person. i bet his family's not perfect either. he needs to live in reality OR tell you if he's been too busy to make a quick phone call that he's really tied up these last few days.

Answer 5

Is his name Nathan? LOL...sounds like the way he treated me. I'm not sure if he is dumping you, but I would say he definitely is not that into you, otherwise he would be paying you more attention and treating you better. There is never an excuse to make plans with someone and not at least call ahead to cancel, or call asap to apologize. Anytime a guy starts to make a habit of saying he will do things and then not follow through...it usually means he's trying to gracefully get out. Sorry!

PS...you can take other's advice and ask him straight out for an honest answer, but it doesn't mean you will get one. I did that twice with Nathan and he assured me a million times that he liked me and wanted to still see me, but in the end, he stood me up without calling and I haven't heard from him in 3 weeks and I'm not holding my breathe.

Answer 6

duh!

You guys definatly have huge issues with communication.
He shuts down & ignores you becuse he doesn't have the balls to explain his change of behavior- which is suggestive of wanting to not continue a relationship with you.

And you, for some reason, hang on to the hope that there is some logical explaination for his lack of connection & that somehow magically will be meeting you're family.

I think you need to step out of the fantasy & face reality.

Answer 7

Yep, he´s not ready for the next step. And by making him agree to meet the folks, you have sped up his evaluation if this is what he wants. Obviously it is not what he wants. You need to talk this out and get it over with.

Answer 8

Sounds like he's possibly freaking out about meeting your parents. Come right out and ask him what is going on and just tell him to be honest with you. If he's dumping you he should at least tell you.

Answer 9

Sounds like it. But ask him. Leave a message saying that you know what's going on and he at least needs to be a man and tell you himself.

Answer 10

Well, sometimes they really do forget. Just wait, don't call. If you don't know you got dumped, you didn't! Ypou are the only person who needs to know and you don't, so you haven't. he probably forgot or got busy, or something like that. Just wait, be patient.