my youngest daughter is 5 years old. she's in kindergarden. she thinks she's in charge. i've tryed so many times to get her to listen to me but she's very determined to do it her way. she'll ask for something (a snack ) and i'll say no ( dinner's in 30 min. ) and she'll keep asking over and over again. she won't do what we say. we've tryed everything. just the other day she frustrated me so much i cryed. her older sister didn't do this. what can i do to get her to mind me without such a big battle of wills?
2006-09-13 02:50:14 · 19 answers · asked by storm_magus3 2 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Parenting
Let her have her fit. Act like it does not bother you. I know it Will. It bothered me when I had to listen to mine do it. She is only doing it because she quickly learned that she gets what she wants when she does it. She Will eventually get over it. When she realizes that method does not work any more she may stop all together or she may try something new.
2006-09-13 02:57:58 · answer #1 · answered by passionparties_by_suzanne 2 · 1⤊ 2⤋
Don't worry! You're not a bad parent and you don't need to hit your child unless your calm and you think it is right. Sometimes reevaluating where you and she are coming from can help a lot. Like with the dinner issue give her a simple choice of two nutritious snacks that you don't mind her having before dinner. You have peace and she is not hungry. Also remember consistency is key if you stay clam and tell her no and stick to it she will eventually realize that when you say no it is not going to change. Sending her out of the room if she starts to get you frustrated is a good technique tell her You need some time to think over what she wants. Oh and lastly, give her lots of special time with you 5 is a hard age, everyone wants you to act like a big kid and you still need a lot of help. Good Luck
2006-09-13 03:00:54 · answer #2 · answered by Tetsi 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Explain to her that when you say no you mean no. Tell her if she keeps asking after you have told her no she will go sit in her room. A few times of making her leave the room and not getting what she asked for the entire day should help clear it up. I have 4 boys and a couple of them were really bad at nagging me - if you give in it reinforces the behavior and they just keep doing it. I know how frustrating it can be- there are times you just want to say I don't care, whatever, just quit pestering me. You have to be consistent or you will never stop it. Good Luck. Be very firm and it will pass in no time.
2006-09-13 02:58:47 · answer #3 · answered by therealprinsess 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Watch nanny 911 or the other nanny program on tv. As a nanny myself, those techniques really are the tools of the trade.
Her problem isnt hers, her problem is yours. Children dont create their own behaviors, they try them, and if the parents accept them in the child then there they are. So she's either learned this from you, or from school, its your job as a parent to reconize this sort of behavior problem in the future and nip it in the bud.
You just need a change of techniques is all. Check out that show, theres also books.
They make it look easy on tv and in books. It really is, the hard part is being commited to it and being consistant. If you're not those things, then you can just forget about any level of change.
2006-09-13 02:55:59 · answer #4 · answered by amosunknown 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to step up and let her know who is the boss. I'm not trying to be mean but I think she's gotten away with a lot for her to act like that. Sometimes though its just a cry for attention. The question is when she cries for snacks do you finally give in? If you do then its your fault she acts like that..because she knows that if I keep getting on mommy's nerves she'll give me what I want. DON'T LET HER SEE YOU CRY! thats a sign of weakness
I know its hard honey but we all gotta do it!
2006-09-13 02:55:38 · answer #5 · answered by cirnrab 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I have a little princess like that who is 5. We are really strict on time out's. 1min for every year. and if she keep's asking she repeat's it...It is slowwwwly getting better...But she is our only girl so she has been treated like she is the best since she was born so we kinda had to take her ego down some. I never had this problem with my older one. Try that if that is not helping IM me I have some other ideas I was given. But this one has worked the best for us.
2006-09-13 03:01:38 · answer #6 · answered by mysticalmoon1975 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
first of all, you must never cry in front of her. instead of showing your emotion, show her that you really won't give her anything. that way she will learn that you mean it when you said "NO" . a simple explanation of the cause is good. like, "you won't get your snack now, cause we will have our dinner soon. if you eat now, you won't be able to eat dinner which is way more delicious than just snack" . if she cries, screams or anything. just let her be, if you could distract her, get her attention into something else would be good. hope these help.. :)
2006-09-13 03:05:41 · answer #7 · answered by mbagus_st 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Be consistant and firm. Kids will constantly challenge your boundaries. Make sure that when you say something, you mean it and that it is consistant with your character. Don't give in one time or the work is wasted. The more consistant you are, the easier it will become, but be aware that every time you do something, it affects your consistancy.
Stand firm, it will get better.
2006-09-13 02:55:17 · answer #8 · answered by Todd B 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You need to toughen up on her and be consistant..,otherwise you will have problems more devasting when shes 12.Better take care of it now..,dont give in..,she does it because you always give in just to shut her up.Let her cry whale throw a fit but dont give in to her..,it will take a few times but it works.Sometimes a pop on the butt doesnt hurt either..,not talking abuse..,just one pop of the rear..it will shock her if you have never done it.
2006-09-13 03:00:12 · answer #9 · answered by halfbright 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you need to get tough love and tough skin. I watch Super Nanny quite a bit, I know it sounds corney but you should watch it too. They have parents going though the same thing. you have to punish her. Take away toys if she doesn't listen to what you ask her to do. Talk to her face to face in a firm voice. Don't feed into the whinning. Talk to her. You should really watch the show. I know it's just a tv show but it might help. What do you have to loose?
2006-09-13 02:52:40 · answer #10 · answered by sweetpea 3 · 4⤊ 0⤋