why do people look down there nose at young mums?

Question

im a young mum (18)got a little girl and i think i am a very good mum just like older mums are!whats the difference?and i am still wi her dad and i am so happy!so why cant other people leave us alone instead of thinkin we are doing it for money or whatever

Answer 1

because people are narrow minded and think that u are 2 young to be having kids and u should be married who cares what people think im sure ur a great mum and u love ur girl heaps. when i was pregnant i was 19 and got the dirtiest looks ever from people i just gave them rude looks back tell who eva who puts u down to shove it. ur look after ur daughter and love her and u are raising her well so they can't judge a book by its cover so to speak. u should be proud of urself having a child at any age is a wonderful thing

Answer 2

Don't worry about whatever one else thinks, honey, just keep doing what you're doing.

But people think these days that young girls getting pregnant too early is a bad choice because they're just not ready. Which most of the time it's true and a lot of the times the grandmothers and other people have to pick up the slack. But what they don't realize is, many many many years ago if you didn't have two kids by the time you were your age, you were considered odd or looked down upon.

A lot of people have babies these days for government money, which is why they also look down on you. They may not know you well enough to know that you're doing it on your own.

Still, you would think in this day and age, the whole looking down on young mothers would stop. There are so many of them.

Answer 3

Doing it for money?? In America, that's a laugh. The LAST thing you do for money here is have a baby young. But I know what you mean. I had my first child when I was 16. I remember when I was pregnant with my 2nd child at 20 (still with the same guy, mind you; was until I was 23. We were together 9 years) and people would say, "Wow, you look so young to have a baby!" and I'd say, "Yeah, I'm 20." And they'd say, "Wow! That's young!" and I'd say, "Yeah, I have a daughter going into kindergarten this year." Then they didn't have sh!t to say. lol.
It's all stereotypes. We were never on welfare or anything like that. But you can't change people's attitudes. Just do what you can to be a good mother and tell them to kiss your @ss.

Answer 4

I am right there with you. I got pregnant at 17 and had the baby at 18. I now have a bueatiful daughter, a part-tome job and I am in college!! I don't rely on the state and I don't want their money either. I am still with her father and have been for two years! People are just so ******* narrow minded that they are conviced that we can't take care of our children and that we must be bad mothers! I think that I am a good Mom right along witht the rest of them! What the hell did they want me to do....have an aborotion! Don't think so... You just keep doing what you are doing. ignore everyone else and don't listen to them!!

Answer 5

Know what? Keep doing what your are doing, and stop worrying about what the rest of the world thinks. You are a good mom and you do not have to justify that to anyone but your child. Lots of young moms out there do treat thier kids lousy, but those are the ones that make it bad for all the good ones. Keep your head up, you are doing a great job, and it's not an easy job to have, parenting is hard. I have 2 kids, 18 and 22 and I know how tough it is out there for them and you. Good Luck!!!!

Answer 6

Many teenage pregnancies have occurred mostly due to a lack of using protection or just being promiscuous.
As a result many teenagers dont finish school and rely on governement agencies to administer care for the child.
tax payers become responsible for obligations they have no connection to. This is not Fair.
Some teenagers have babies because they think that it is cute.
Children suffer because people of all ages don't plan or think about the long term outcomes.
If you are able to finish high school and attend college and be a mother to your child, then I salute you for being multi-faceted.
One positive thing about your situation is that you and the father are still together. sometimes when teenagers have children and are forced to work and become independent, it can be very pressurizing.
My son's father was very accommodating during the first two years of my son's life. he worked and thought that buying pampers and cases of Similac would suffice.
he didn't bond with his son. when I started dating someone else, My son's father became enraged because my son was more familiar with my boyfriend. i ended that relationship because I wanted my child to be able to bond with his Dad.
You mentioned that people think that you are just doing it for the money. Are you on public assistance? What money are you referring to?
In conclusion: If your parenting doesn't increase my tax liability, you don't abuse your child and you are responsible, then Kudos to you. If it doesn't affect me financially or negatively no problemo.

Answer 7

a number of my closest acquaintances are youthful single mums. i think of it rather is principally to do with people who're slender minded and over-generalising. My buddy replaced into in a stable relationship, she replaced into employed, he replaced into employed and that that they had a healthy income. They lived jointly and life replaced into fantastically stable. She have been given pregnant, he knew what he replaced into doing yet while he found out, he ran away. He will pay little or no newborn help, if any in any respect. Hasn't paid a penny interior the final twelve months a minimum of. Now she's on her very own and people do no longer say something, yet they seem at her in undesirable techniques. i do no longer like it and by no skill do it, she's a stunning female and that i will't comprehend why people may be so harsh. it rather is actual that some people get a infant so they might get a house from their council and all of us pay for that. yet there's a distinction between somebody who threw themselves into that subject and expects the state to pay for them, and people who've been dropped into their subject by no fault of their very own. My buddy works, has carried out for an prolonged time. She will pay for her very own newborn care. She does get some reward from the state yet she's with the help of no skill sat at abode all day complaining approximately how unfair the international is to her, she's out at paintings for the main hours she would manage to arise with the money for childcare for and seems after her daughter for something. She is going to our paintings events the place they pay for the beverages yet this is approximately it. mum and dad ought to coach their babies approximately intercourse and maximum do yet some do no longer. severe college truancy is severe. some rather everyone seems to be there purely a tiny fraction of the time and purely study intercourse from their acquaintances, who're frequently incorrect. Society frequently fails those people then shuns them while they make the inevitable blunders of having pregnant. i do no longer look down on youthful mums that pull their way. on an identical time, i do in comparison to those who call for handouts, mum and dad or no longer. froggie

Answer 8

Unfortunately it's just society some older mums can't help but tell young mums what to do & how to raise your child i know from experience & young mums need encouragement they do'nt need to be frowned upon sounds like you are doing really well do'nt let them tell you what to do . do'nt be afraid to politely tell them to mind their business or tell them u are handling it .
be proud & it's good to hear u are with your baby's daddy but tell them it's none of their business whether u are or not as long as the kid has love food & a stable environment & clothed who cares tell them too bugger off!!! as u are busy nuturing tomorrows generation !!!! Take no notice hope u all have a lovely life together & i wish u all the best from one mum to another

Answer 9

I think most responsible people think that it's irresponsible to have a baby so young. How can you financially handle the responsibilities of a family when you don't have a career? (College graduates earn more money than high school graduates, generally.) So the assumption is probably that you are mooching off of someone, like parents, and that's seems irresponsible to many people.

Answer 10

when your 40 years old. and have missed out on running your own life and pampering to the needs of ever one else, as slaves do, you will understand that we are not looking down our nose at you, we are just sad to see you and be able to know that you may be wasting your talent. cause when it all boils down to it why not have children at 30 so you can have 14 years to enjoy your self be for your to old.